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Josè Mourinho - Inter (Getty Images)
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Portuguese coach Jose Mourinho has sent shockwaves through the world of football by resigning as coach of Inter, and revealing he will be the next coach of Real Madrid.
Mourinho has cited a number of reasons for his decision to leave the Serie A leaders. They include his troubled relationship with the Italian media, his recent falling out with Mario Balotelli, the discovery that his home telephone had been bugged by club president Massimo Moratti, as well as an “offer he couldn’t refuse” from Real Madrid.
‘The Special One’ arrived in Italy in the summer of 2008, but despite winning the Scudetto in his first season at Inter he has never seen eye-to-eye with the local press or with rival coaches and personnel. Only on Tuesday, Mourinho told the English media that he was “not happy in Italian football, because I don't like it and they don't like me”, further fuelling already red-hot rumours that he was to quit Serie A in the summer.
Perhaps this was the warning sign of what was around the corner, but this morning’s announcement has still taken everyone by complete surprise.
“I have resigned as coach of Inter with immediate effect. I leave now. I told my players last night after the game [against CSKA Moscow in the Champions League]. I then told Massimo Moratti while he was entertaining some oiligarchs in the hospitality suite,” Mourinho told Goal.com.
“The truth is that I have had enough of Italy. I am [the] best coach in [the] world, a phenomenon, but I have been treated with absolutely zero respect from day one.
“Instead the media shows respect to losers. Ranieri has won just a little tin cup in 80 years and they speak of him as a God. They talk of him being Italy coach after Lippi! Leonardo has won zeru tituli, Macaroni couldn’t even beat Fulham!
“All I see is intellectual prostitution. Inter are treated by the media as murderers. Tell me, who caused Calciopoli? Who has been robbed by referees for the last four years? Whose 75-year-old president goes out with 18-year-olds? Not Inter!
Mourinho went on to explain that his bust-up with troubled teenage superstar Mario Balotelli also played a role in his exit. The two fell out a number of weeks ago, and Mourinho had declined to select the young forward for six games since, citing Balotelli's refusal to apologise as the reason for his continued exclusion.
“Balotelli is a punk,” sniped the 47-year-old.
“He is the best talent I have ever worked with, but his head is all messed up. You want to know why we fell out? Well, I will tell you. The day before we played Catania, Balotelli turned up for training wearing an AC Milan thong and David Beckham bra.
“I sent him home and told him I was disgusted with his behaviour. He refused to say sorry, and said I have no sense of humour. I am a professional and I have no time for such punks. He is a spoilt child. Milan deserve him. But of course they'll only want him when he's 35.”
Mourinho was this week blasted by Palermo president Maurizio Zamparini, who claimed that he wasn't enough of a father-figure to effectively handle the teenage Balotelli.
Upon hearing the dramatic news of Mourinho's departure, Zamparini brashly announced to Goal.com: "I was right! The man has no class and no sense of man-management.
"The man is not even a man, he's a child. Balotelli behaved better than he did.
"Good riddance to him, I say. He loves England so much? Well, let him get on his boat and sail back to the land of the pirates!"
Mourinho went on to give details of how president Massimo Moratti had attempted to talk him out of resigning, and that he almost changed his mind until he was “betrayed”.
“Moratti begged me to stay at least until the end of the season. I almost agreed but then I dropped my phone onto the floor and this little chip fell out with ‘Telecom Italia’ writing on it.
“I felt betrayed. I have worked day and night for this club for almost two years. It makes me sick that they would bug my phone.”
Finally, Mourinho revealed some even more startling news – he will be Real Madrid’s coach for next season.
“Yes, it is true,” he confirmed.
“My agent called me and said that Manuel Pellegrini will be sacked in May. The job is mine if I say ‘yes’, and so I say to everyone now: ‘Yes’.
“It is an offer I couldn’t refuse. Clearly, Mr Perez at least can see that I'm still the Special One.”
When pressed on players he would like to sign for Real Madrid, Mourinho stressed: “That would be disrespectful of me, but I will tell you one thing. Ricardo will come with me.”
It is unclear whether the tactician was referring to Ricardo Quaresma, but one thing is for certain: Jose Mourinho is no longer coach of Inter.
April Fool
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