Thirty Silly excuses not to wear a condom

hmmmm...my husband is online..can we talk about that another day?

1. I’ll pull out before I ejaculate.
2. I left them in the car’s glove compartment and they melted!
3. They hurt me, they cut the blood off.
4. I’m too big, I cannot wear them.
5. We didn’t use one last time and it was ok, wasn’t it?
6.There wasn’t any left in the machine.
7. It’s like having a bath with your socks on.
8. I never wear them and I am ok, I’ve never had an STD
9. I’m too embarrassed to buy them.
10. They are too expensive, I don’t have money for that, I’d rather spend 11.my money on you.
12.We don’t need condoms, you’re on the pill.
13.I had a vasectomy, we don’t need them.
14.Why? I don’t have any disease!
15.Don’t you trust me?
16.If you love me you wouldn’t ask me to wear one.
17.We’ve already gone this far, we can’t stop now.
18.I am better at it without one.
19.It ruins the mood.
20.Do you think you would catch something from me? Come on, I had a  shower this morning!
21.They don’t work, my sister got pregnant with one.
22.Only if you can put it on with your mouth (with a big smile).
23.Why don’t YOU wear one?
24.My religion forbids me from wearing condoms.
25.Better not wear one, I know a girl who had to go to hospital to have a condom removed!
26.I don’t enjoy it with a condom.
27.YOU wouldn’t like it with a condom!
28.We only need them if you are sleeping around, because I am not. Are you?
29.They could give you a rash!
30.It’s my birthday!