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1  Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / ZOO on: 17-09-2009 12:14 AM
A man drives to a gas station and has his tank filled up. The gas pumper spots two penguins sitting in the back seat of the car.
He asks the driver, "What's up with the penguins in the back seat?"

The man in the car says "I found them. I asked myself what to do with them, but I haven't had a clue."

The clerk ponders a bit then says, "You should take them to the zoo."

"Hey, that's a good idea," says the man in the car and drives away.

The next day the man with the car is back at the same gas station. The clerk sees the penguins are still in the back seat of the car.

"Hey, they're still here! I thought you were going to take them to the zoo."

"Oh, I did," says the driver, "And we had a swell time. Today I am taking them to the beach."
2  Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / insulting parrot on: 10-08-2009 10:20 PM
A lady was walking past a pet store when a parrot said, "Hey, lady! You're really ugly!" The lady was angry, but she continued on her way.

On the way home, she passed by the pet store again, and again, the parrot said, "Hey, lady! You're really ugly!" Furious, the lady stormed into the store and threatened to sue the store.

The store manager apologized profusely and promised he would make sure the parrot didn't say it again.

The next day, she deliberately passed by the store to test the parrot. "Hey, lady!" it said.


"You know...."
3  Forum / Sports / Best finisher on: 4-08-2009 11:28 PM
Who is the best finisher among dis players ronaldo,messi,and torres...
4  Forum / Sports / Alonso deal on: 4-08-2009 11:17 PM
Alonso is leaving liverpool for real that the right decision for him to make...send ur comments about what u feel about dis decision....
5  Forum / Sports / TORRES AND ROBBINO on: 22-07-2009 12:14 AM
Who is better between fernando torres and robino.......say ur opinion...
6  Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / Re: mistake on a weddin cake on: 19-07-2009 01:59 AM
keep it up
7  Forum / Sports / Bright future on: 19-07-2009 01:53 AM
I believe glen johnson will have a brighter future in liverpool following the signing of the left back.....
8  Forum / Sports / Who is the best Torres ? Drogba on: 8-05-2009 12:55 AM
Who among the two striker is the best
9  Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / WAHALA on: 8-05-2009 12:46 AM
A woman went to her priest with a problem. "Father, I have two female parrots, and they only know how to say one thing. All they ever say is, 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Wanna have some fun?' "
"That's terrible!" exclaimed the priest. "But I think I can help. Bring your two female parrots over to my house, and I will put them with my two male parrots whom I taught to pray and read the Bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase, and your female parrots will learn to praise and worship."

The next day, the woman brought her female parrots to the priest's house. His two male parrots were holding rosary beads and quietly praying in their cage. The woman put her two female parrots in the cage with the male parrots. The females said, "Hi, we're prostitutes. Wanna have some fun?"

One male parrot looked over at the other male parrot and exclaimed "Put those beads away, our prayers have been answered!"
10  Forum / Sports / Final Btwn Man U and Barca on: 8-05-2009 12:42 AM
Who will be the latest defending champion of the uefa champions league coming forth on may 27 2009 between the defending champion and the la liga winner of this season.
11  Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / Three Explorers Chooses Their Death on: 7-02-2009 12:48 AM
A Frenchman, an Englishman and a New Yorker are exploring the jungle and are captured by a fierce tribe.

The chief tells them, "The bad news is that we've caught you, we're going to kill you, and then use your skins to build a canoe. The good news is that you get to choose how you die."

The Frenchman says, "I take ze poison." The chief gives him some poison; the Frenchman says, "Vive la France!" and drinks it down.

The Englishman says, "A pistol for me, please." The chief gives him a pistol; the Brit points it at his head, says, "God save the Queen!" and blows his brains out.

The New Yorker says, "Gimme a fork." The chief is puzzled, but he shrugs and gives him a fork. The New Yorker takes the fork and jabs himself all over -- the stomach, the sides, the chest, everywhere. Blood gushes from every hole.

The chief screams, "What are you doing?"

The New Yorker looks at the chief and says, "So much for your canoe, a**hole!"
12  Forum / Sports / MAN OF THE MATCH on: 3-02-2009 12:22 AM
Who is your man of the match,liverpool versus chelsea
13  Forum / Sports / Re: who's best STEVEN GERRARD OR FRANK LAMPARD on: 3-02-2009 12:20 AM
14  Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / FINAL EXAM FAILURE on: 3-02-2009 12:08 AM
Last semester I took macroeconomics and didn't have a clue what I was doing (as cited on the final exam). There were 80 multiple choice questions. For some reason I decided to play the game of probability and choose the letter "A" for everything. In that game, the only thing probable was that I failed.
The following day, the professor asked to see me after class. "Is everything okay?" "Sure," I said, "why? "Well, here's your test," he said and handed me a piece of paper that was covered with red ink. "Can you explain why you chose an 'A' for everything?"

Knowing that there was nothing I could do at this point, I said, "Well, I've always wanted to be an 'A' student."
15  Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / Re: THE TOMATO SELLER on: 30-01-2009 01:09 AM
thanks for all ur contribution
16  Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / Re: HOW TO IMPRESS A WOMAN/MAN on: 25-01-2009 11:24 PM
why arguement now
17  Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / Re: THE DONKEY on: 25-01-2009 11:07 PM
nice joke
18  Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / Re: check this.. on: 25-01-2009 09:44 PM
wetin be this now
19  Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / Alligator shoes on: 25-01-2009 09:39 PM
A blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes, but didn't want to pay the high prices.

After unsuccessfully haggling with of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde said, "Maybe I'll just go out and catch my own alligator, so I can get a pair of shoes at a reasonable price."

Later in the day, the shopkeeper spotted the young woman standing waist deep in the water, shotgun in hand. She took aim at an alligator, killed it and hauled it onto the swamp bank.

Lying nearby were several more of the dead creatures. The shopkeeper watched in amazement as the blonde flipped the alligator on its back and shouted in frustration, "Damn, this one isn't wearing any shoes either."
20  Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / HOW TO IMPRESS A WOMAN/MAN on: 19-01-2009 10:43 AM
How to Impress a Woman:
compliment her,
kiss her,
caress her,
love her,
comfort her,
protect her,
hold her,
spend money on her,
wine & dine her,
listen to her,
stand by her,
support her,
go to the ends of the earth for her.

How to Impress a Man:
show up naked,
bring beer.
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