Am afraid of evn d slightest tin, life  & me.

I've seen dis exact story b4 nw, & it's rily bin long oh. Where did u get dis 4rm again.

Na u saka!

An English teacher walks in2 d class 2 teach & in d course of it realizes dat John(1 of her students) didn't submit his assignment. D followin dialogue took place.
TEACHER: John y didn't u submit ur assignment wen odas did.
JOHN: Excuse me ma,i came 2 ur office yesterday bt u didn't in.
TEACHER(who was angry): What! Wil u correct dat sentence of urs.
JOHN: Sori ma,i came 2 ur office yesterday bt u didn't around.
(D teacher who was very angry now,decides 2 call on d most brilliant boy in d class 2 help out).
TEACHER: Iyke dear,wil u pls help dis empty head out.
IYKE( stands up confidently & says): i came 2 ur office yesterday bt U DIDN'T DEY. 

Ahh na beef? Just a joke though.

E get d way u as a lady go take dey wey go determine d kind toastin u go receive 4rm guys.

If u dey dirty,tattered,d guy go dey consida d kind english e go use,u go hear somtin lyk dis.
Guy: hey u gal,show show. Na toastin make me cal u o. Go ask dose gals wey i toast 4 our area wey no gree,i burn dia house.Burn house neva tire me o! Unles u wan slip 4 bunk.

But if u dey neat & fine,d guy go dey construct d kind english e go use,u go hear sometin lyk dis.
Guy: Excuse me princess,d luv i hav 4 u is greata dan d luv adam hav 4 eve,far greata dan d luv obasanjo had in d increase in fuel price.Dat's y my luv is built upon u & d gate of hell shal not prevail.Excuse me princess,hav u eva bin in luv b4? If @ all,dat must b d fotocopy dis is d original,dat's y i want u 2 sip 4rm my luv not wit a straw but a hose.

Some kind gals wey è enta dia head go respond lyk so.
Girl: Rily? Wøt u jst said now is a  RHAPSODY OF REALITY.Wen i 1st saw u,i knew u wie comin 2 giv my lyf A MEANING. Wen u came closer,i discovad u wie flowin in an ATMOSPHERE OF MIRACLE & wen u shook hands wit me Jesus! I felt a TOTAL EXPERIENCE,becos last night was a NIGHT OF BLISS let's make 2day a SUPER SUNDAY.

Sunny,a young boy went wit his camera 2 his village 2 c his old grandmother. He asked her 2 pose 4 a snapshot which she did. As d flashlight shone on her,she ran inside d house. D boy was startled & asked his granny y she was running,d old woman replied,"my pikin enta house quick quick,e be like sey thunder wan strike".

Gudluck 2 dem.