A quite clear argument
Many Nigerian men will ally to your position, I know :-) That has a lot to do with socialtradition and culture. In Africa, not just in Nigeria, you might agree with me that most partners that break up end up becoming "enemies" in the sense that they do wipe all contacts with each other, they don`t talk to each other anymore etc. If any woman breakes up with her man and still has good contacts with him, the society thinks otherwise because it is, to the sight of the society, not "normal"
Again, because of the very wide gap between boys and girls in Africa, parners tend to beeing extremly protective and possessive in marriage. Boys and girls are forbidden by the societal norms and morality to socialized normally with each other (abnormal socialism). This has great effects on individual lives of adults and in relationships and families. Sex education is not a topic in Nigerian high schools not even at the higher lernings. The natural pressure for sex grows as one grows. Many Nigerian youths desire sex but have no access to it due to abnormal socialism, societal norms, religion etc. Due to unsatisfied sex life, people become, for instance, more adventurious about sex and take the REAR sex oppotunities they have to enjoy it maybe with ex cos it might be easier.
Religion has widened this gap the more and goes on to subject the woman under the authority of the man, thereby making the man a tyrant and the woman an inferrior subject (hierarchy) which was partly why I used the word slave earlier. In reality, over 60% of Nigerian women are slaves in the marriages. To worsen it all, the societal traditions and religion do not allow for divorce.
This constellation builds a "wrong and sick" mindset and mentality that make us want to cage control our women like a senior commander would do to his squad in military camp.
Keeping cordial relationships with exes is a normal and common practice in Europe. It`s even seen as social competence. The cordial relationship between exes are not kept secret.
It doesn`t rule out the fact that exes might engage in segxwal activities but that is not common in societies where male & female children and youth are well sicialised.
Lastly, one can do little or nothing about it as both parties in marriage are dependent but at the same time independent of each other.
Hello again bro. I can see you are a man given to equal right opportunity and am not in any way against that. Let's talk a little bit about the Europe you just gave as an example. Do you know how easily families break down. Does not matter whether you live in Europe or not. It is all over the news and that is because of what they call civilization and let every man do what pleases him or her. You may choose to ignore the bible as the word of God or don't believe in God. I believe the word of God and yes the bible makes it clear that wives should submit to the husband but it also commands the man to love his wife as his own body. How can a man love a woman as is own body and see her as a slave. it is not possible.
Besides that I'd like you to understand that I am not restricting this issue of not communicating with an ex to just the woman. The same goes for the man. I still repeat 99% of ex's friendship after marriage will one day lead to something else (fanning back the flame). I am not even saying don't talk to them or say hello when a situation calls for it. But man .. chatting, BBMing, hanging out and other related stuff will surely lead to something at some point except we don't want to be sincere with ourselves. They both know the button to turn on. If you want a healthy marriage then you need to cut off and keep communication to minimal. The western world has brought so much decay to what we know as holy matrimony. It has been reduced to what you now call contract.
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