"Summarized" means for me a lot, among many other things that the person is not a Nigerian! Understanding how deep rooted this issue is, may take a lot of energy to explain. It may not be surprised if any relationship with a non-Nigerian and Nigerian may not last till Thy Kingdom come. I mean, the quote may be very high than when it's Nigerian - Nigerian families. Our values to marriage life is deep, very deep rooted, though it's not just cooking food. There A LOT.

I know also, upbringing and environment has a lot of role to play in all this regard.

@

Sumarized!

Thank you

@Bittersweet

It's quite normal that two or more persons can see life and approach it with different perspectives. Emancipation is doing it's job,. It's good so, but reasonable African values, customs and the embraced Christian ethics must not go like the whirlwind.

In as much as one may have and live with his believed principles, no problem. It's all a matter of who can live with that. I Know too well of the changing times, but sometimes it embarrasses me that some Africans imitate and live the Western life more than the westerners themselves.

Most of us are living in so-called developed world, which has it's rights and obligations. We must be equally ready to live with the obligation, outcome and responsibility to the life we choose to.

Take care and bye for now.

Chris

IGBO LADIES ARE PRICELESS FOR THEIR GUYS!

Igbo Princesses, we love you all! Agwa bu nma nwanyi.

Keep your lifestyle up!

Ihea bu "Egwu onye okara obi". Ana ekwu ekwu, ana eme eme. Obughi egbe onu ka eji eme.

Anam ekpe ekpere oge nile ka Chineke nyem 'onye nkem'. Ebe ka unu no gasi?

DECLARATION
"We, the Igbo guys, home and abroad love Igbo ladies and have no much reason to go for another ethnic group ladies (IN MARRIAGE) in Nigeria. Instead of another ethnic group in Naija, we go complete foreign - outside Nigeria.

Those who could not afford it or is not ready to pay the tag, please leave them in peace. Few Igbo ladies who choose other ethnic group men to date or marry, well, for love sake, go ahead, no more no less!"

May we embrace civil liberty than abuse and tribalism sentiments in NP. For God's sake, here is "world-wide-web - www" please. Non-Nigerians are here too.

Bye for now.

Chris

Dear Bittersweet,

Thanks very much for your response and expression of ur feelings towards my opinion. Thank you especially for reminding me to review my piece before posting them. There u are completely right because I rushed the writing and never proof-read it at all. That is nice of you.

However, I do not know if it's fair to refer a person u think you're advising that s/he knew nothing about the issue which you'd responded as well.

My problem with your statement does not portray that you do not know how to cook, nor there is less passion for the act, but for showing your hubby the oven in the same home two of you are living, may mean to me, that you cannot tolerate objective criticism. If he says, he does not like the taste of your food or a particular food, all these things are signs of love for u to improve. No one is perfect. Would you be happy if he keeps quiet and gently go to his other unseen person to feed himself, if you show him oven on several occasions?

I think it would have been better to try to find out where the problem lies. You may have tried your best, but your best may not be enough at all times. To drive him to the kitchen does not for me show sign of respect and obedience (or biblical "submissive woman") or of a virtuous woman which many crave for. He may also be same 'submissive' to you in other ways. To show me the kitchen oven, O God???

I do not mean to slight or insult you whatsoever, so please do not misconstrue me , rather I wish to portray my opinion.

The issue for me is not the passion and energy put it, but "Guys, how would feel if your babe does not know how to cook?"

My candid opinion is 'Learn, Teach, Learn, Teach, Learn Teach', but all with LOVE and JOY in doing that. And the learner should be more clever to do it better later. "Liebe geht durch den magen" - "Love passes through the stomach".

Thank you and bye now.

from
Chris

@Ngeri and Bittersweet,

We all have read and followed varied opinions here. These write-ups are not craps but the reality of.
The difference is clear. We love our Naija roots! Our babes, we must always come for you.

German adage says "liebe geht durch den magen" - "loves passes through the stomach".

There is no professionalism or career that abhors one (ladies in particular) to learn how to cook, and very well. Not just for the man, but for their kids. When this quality fails or becomes something of less important, then I wonder how the husband could be all confident that he's no more a bachelor.

Food is ingredient to life. I like the statement of our home breeds. Ladies learn from mother from childhood, men too, but not often. If you cannot cook and cannot learn from your hubby or boy friend, if he can and wish to teach, and you do not care to find a teacher, then I wonder what 'I' will be doing with such a lady?

Even I am a chef, I must do it to earn a living (money) for the home security and deserve my wife, while I do same cooking atimes.

German Chancellor (Leader/Prime Minister) Mrs. Angela Merkel still find time to cook for her husband, so I wonder what the hell is all about being a career woman, bla bla bla.

Thank you our responsible home-breed ladies. More grease to your elbows in this topic.

I feel that this is just complete nonsense. Cumming in her mouth cannot be the reason why he left his babe. Where are such babes? I think most guys dream of this, but find almost none.

It's complete scrap for one to believe this. There may be other causes for their separation, if the whole story is true.

I think we should be wiser than this at this computer age.

The main problem for living abroad Naija guys is to find the Naija babes nearby who are free, not only free, but those who actually come over here with a purpose than looking for money. Yes, looking for money is good, but we must all accept that the lifestyle overseas (Euro-America-Asia can turn one into a certain lifestyle which s/he may not have tried at all. Some guys turn to Dada (Rastafarians), Homoeosegxwals, Drug dealers and or Addicts, Gigolos, Ear ring wearers, shoplifting, and other vices while most women enter the aged long (old)  vocation - prostitution and unfaithful to their partners. Unfaithfulness is also much much more in Nigeria.
 
In all, I think it is still wiser to find a person where one is with a person who understands the reality on the ground, than travelling to Africa to later face the reality of life abroad after a few years with hard labour to trolley her over here with endless documentations.

The truth recently is that most of our guys have turned to Kenya women in Germany than  Nigerian ladies. A lot encourage us to look/check at those our East African sisters. I know at least, nine families (Naija men -Kenya woemn. They feel and live happily and work together to make showcase success in Nigeria.

Our ladies, I advise those who cares, to find ot what's wrong? Is it our/your too much love for money, our upbringing style, over zealous lifestyle or our Naija society value syndrome?

Thanks and bye for now.

from
Chris

Man, you have just said my mind. But where are all those our sisters that meant relationship with all seriousness, pains and goodies that it demands, especially here in Germany?

Could those who want them (our naija babes) be lucky to meet them? Or are they existing in particular clique or zone, may be, the one of which I do not belong or know about?

Searching, searching and searching. I think some just give up and travel home where it is a certainty and varied to find.

In summary, I think Divine intervention is the key to find the right one.

No one is right or right, but there are those who are ready for family life and those who are not naturally family orientated, be a man or woman.

Thanks and bye for now.

from
Chris

@Mallorca,

Spain did not develop with ogwu ego neither did entire Europe did, but with ideas, education and the blend of humanity, especially to their people.

Ogwu ego is being perpetuated by beasts in human form. They do not believe in specialized knowledge and education to achieve financial freedom.

They are empty vessels who believes that money is not made with IDEAS like that of Warren Buffet, the Microsoft's Bill G., the Albrecht brothers, etc.

The "Ogwu ego" lovers meet their waterloo at the tail of their so called success and cannot be trusted. Many have lost human feelings and what honesty is all about.

They are offsprings of kidnapping in Igbo land today, whose parents believed that money is all that is required to be a human being. Their children are replicas of parents.

Any defender of Ogwu ego (money making juju) has always aftermath repercussion, and that is good so.

@Treasure, I cherish your posting.

Take care.

from
Chris

Well, Parliaments of any nation can go ahead to enact any type of laws they want, be it stupid or senseless. I wonder why a learned person (any way, Nigeria type of educated people) should punish the minors.

Don't they realize that the United Nations Treaty of Children's Rights of 1989 prohibits lashing or flogging minors? Nigeria signed this Treaty. We ought to obey this directive, whether we like it or not. Why didn't the government provide them good lawyers? I am sorry for these children and the typical Nigeria injustices. How can you warn them to desist from acts without providing alternatives means of livelihood? Who will flog the corrupt public office holders?

In a country where the government did not provide any means of sustainability for its citizens, you enact stupid laws to prohibit them from fending for themselves to enable them live on this planet earth.

It is shameful to put it this on world-wide-web (www) for the world to read and see how backward thinking Nigeria is.

I am ashamed to be a Nigerian in in this act and decision and in consideration of the decision of the Court Judges in question.

May God help Nigeria.

from
Nwaorah C.

I noticed that most of the so-called cult guys and girls are very primitive, backward focused and dull students who are too lazy cannot read their books to pass their exams very well.

They will realize their problems after graduation and join millions of the joblessness and cannot further their education in many world universities because they cannot cope with the rigorous of academic life, only but few of them who mean their duty to education. After graduation, they will know themselves. That is exactly the problem with Nigeria. I am sorry for the cultists. They want to belong. Belong to no where, believing that it will help them in life, MAN FORGET IT! It's empty promises. You'll be used and dumped when the time comes.

They (cultists) misplace issues and priorities and accept it as norm.

Other world universities, Ghana inclusive train employable and job creators and not hanging on cultism.

Bye for now.

From
The Igbo man, Chris

May I refer those who cares to know to read my advice to Rose Gabriel underneath her complaint - 1st page.

Underexposure and myopic is a disease. What this lady did is very normal and natural all over the world. Who is not interested to have a successful person as partner? This guy is a German diplomat. Many Kenyans and other African ladies had married this way.

Those who love money of a person, just get some tips and not the bulk. Who tries luck and wins, wins the bulk, and that could happen through marriage or strong and honest relationship, unless you are a dirty crook.

I would never like to date a girl twice who I notice is after my money. No matter how she plays the game, a sceptical person like me would fairly find out, at least often times.

I am disappointed with some Nigerians here who accuse this lady of wrong doing.  More surprisingly from fellow women, who blame her, advise her why not go for the money, and bla bla bla. Anyway, this is what is obtainable in a country like Nigeria where rule of law is non-existent. May be, these people judge the world from that their environment they live.

She only needs information, facts and figures to work with, and present it correctly and at the appropriate quarters, and she will get redressed. She must not marry the man to have a baby, but she can one hundred per cent get a child support which is not a small money until the child is 18 years.

This is a law that is OPERATIONAL AND NORMAL in Germany, not in our Nigeria. She can stay in Nigeria and still get the law to her favour.

Her approach now, first making it open through the press, second the use of "well-informed and if possible Overseas educated lawyers practicing in Nigeria", third the use of the information available, presenting the complaints at the appropriate offices, and follow it up. It may take long time, but it MUST work at the end of the tunnel.

What is important here is not the right of the lady, but the right of the child, which we ignore in Africa in general.

I am sure that those who does not understand the workable "rule of law" will definitely misunderstand my writing.

Lady Rose, you are the correct babe. I like your wits and guts. Fight on!

For us in Nigeria to develop and survive: 

WE NEED CRITICAL THINKING NOT DOGMA.

WE NEED TO HAVE OPEN-MINDEDNESS IN COMMUNICATION NOT DISTRUST AND DECEITS.

WE NEED INFORMATION AND JOB NOT BLIND FAITH.

WE NEED REASON AND DEEPER REASONING, NOT REVELATIONS AND RELIGION ONLY

WE NEED EDUCATION, INDUSTRY AND TECHNOLOGY TO WORK NOT PRAYER ONLY.

WE NEED TOLERANCE, LOVE AND PASSION FOR OUR CITIZENS NOT HATRED AND SELF CRITICISM.

WE NEED SUITABLE DEMOCRACY AND STRONG INSTITUTIONS NOT AUTOCRACY AND BIG MAN SYNDROME

WE NEED SCEPTISM NOT PENTECOSTALISM.

So the blending of information, education, science, socio-economic, cultural, religions and technological disciplines is necessary

Thank you and bye once again.

From
Chris,
a Nigerian resident in Germany.

This is good move Rose. May God protect you and your child. Continue the fight. We all signed and accepted that Germany is a legal state, where rule of law is the ultimate. Germans can go to any level to protect themselves and their citizens, but when the axe of law dangles, they surrender.

I therefore, as a Nigerian resident in Germany and have tested the German legal system (bitter and sweet ones), I urge you to intensify efforts, include more Human Rights Organisations to fish out the German wherever he may be. Apart from that, everyone in Germany is in a data bank where the authorities can have access to your data.

Anybody can be fished out. Write to the Youths Office Head Office called "Jungendamt" in Berlin, German Federal Foreign Office in Berlin called "Auswaertiges Amt" c/o. Foreign Office Minister, Mr. Guido Westerwelle, through your lawyers, write to "Karawane" Germany, Human Rights Watch of the United States, Disckriminationsstelle Germany, etc. etc. To get full names and addresses, please Google them. Diskriminationsstelle means Discrimination's Office, etc.

Petition also to the German Embassy. But do not forget, the Embassy has limited actions they can take.

Do not forget, in Germany you must get your legal right as long as you are right in the case. The people and the government can go to any level to proof their case beyond reasonable doubts, like the use of DNA Test in this case at hand, etc. So do make sure that you are right in your submission and claim or the law may turn against you, which can equally be expensive. Law in Germany is no respecter of persons. Everybody is equal before the law. No big man or top people palaver as it is in Nigeria. So check yourself well and be sure of all the data about the Ferdinand, like his true name, date of birth and where he was born, if possible. Although the Embassy may have this, but they are not allowed to expose ones data like, or the Ferdinand can sue them in Germany.

Above all, Germans never play with the rights of kids at all. Children are well protected than in most part of the world. I love Germans for that. So your Gabriela rights supercedes yours and the so-called Ferdinand.

With these FOUR PARTICULAR INFORMATION: Name in full, Date of Birth and Place of Birth, the picture of the baby, then you have the person in your finger tip.

Take care and bye for now.

From
Chris,
A Nigerian, resident in
Germany

TOO LONG TEXT BUT INTERESTING.  READ ON!

Maradona (419 introducer) Ibrahim Badamasi Babangida.  One day, your Mina Mansion built with our oil money will turn to be a Museum for Nigeria. Wicked people who parade the corridors of power in Nigeria are too many.

Where is Nigeria's $12.9 billion oil windfall? Where is MKO Abiola? Where is Dele Giwa? Where is Fela's Mum? Where is your Chuba Okadigbo? What does this man want in Aso Rock again? May be to deal with other people who had told him the truth in the recent past and he took it as insult and impunity. You have not even commonly apologized to Nigeria? You take us all for granted. Your charms, amulets, spirits and gods had faded out.

IBB, YOUR ERA IS OVER AND OVER FOREVER. NIGERIANS WAKE UP!

For sure, many western countries who hates us blacks and Nigerians in particular that I know are solidly behind this day-devil campaigner.

Yesterday is gone, but your legacy remains.

There is no single serious services and polices than 419 that Nigerians can remember you about for eight years as No. 1 citizen. June 12 1993 was till today, the best election, Nigeria ever had. The most free and fair election most Nigerians accepted, but you and your racist western friends refused us the vote.

Your predecesors:
Abubakir Tafawa Balewa (though short-lived, but was not corrupt)
Nnamdi Azikiwe (though ceremonial president, but stood for One Nigeria.
General T. Y. U Aguiyi-Ironsi (short-lived through brutal means)
Yakubu Gowon - upheld One Nigeria and was not corrupt
Murtala Mohammed (very short, but created new states (that was new idea - he was creative)
Olusegun Obasanjo - handed over to Civilian Shehu Shagari
Shehu Shagari - corrupt administration with Umaru Diko and co.
Buhari - Idiagbo regime (very upright, honest, dedicated and creative). They instilled discipline among themselves and in Nigerians. There was rule-of-law. They were not corrupt, etc. Although dictatorial. And that was what Nigeria needed at that time, because Shagari administration bastardized Nigeria. In fact, Buhari - Tunde Idiagbo was the best government Nigeria had. They attacked the rich than the poor and average Nigerians, then others follow suit.

Ibrahim Badamasi Babangida (this IBB) toppled the government through wicked coup. Very painful.

He completed the bastardization and balkanization of Nigeria and crowned it all with cancellation of the BEST ELECTION AFRICA HAD - the June 12 and went into his mansion where his racist friends visits him to plot for our down total fall again.

Ernest Shonekan (short-lived)

Abacha (entrenched more discipline but too dictatorial without mercy.

Abubakir - he handed over to civilian ins a shabby but somewhat election, that brought in Obasanjo (OBJ) through his little past good record of handing over to civilians. At least, he left a fair legacy.

Olusegun Obasanjo brought in Nigeria's top brains and paid off Nigeria's external debt. Privatized never-do-well NITEL (Nigeria Telecommunications) and brought in MTN, Etisalat, Global telephone for all in Nigeria etc. but tried third term agenda, failed and still handed over to another person - Musa Yar'adua.

Out of divine providence and prayer of most churches and mosques in Nigeria, we now have Jonathan. Nigerians confidence are slowly returning, Babangida want to come and destroy it.


A people without the knowledge of their past history, origin and culture is like a tree without roots. --Marcus Garvey

Africa for the Africans... at home and abroad!  ---Marcus Garvey

Africa had fought racism to the level we are today, from slave trade to colony-neocolony to apartheid south Africa to stooge leaders to the present incredible corruption. We are marching forward.

So Mr. IBB, your old school is disappearing brother. You must leave the young talents to move on whether you like it or not.

A clarion-call to Nigerians.

Just to make it brief.

from
Nwaorah
Munich, Germany

Is it because most Pakistans are moslems like Dangote? Nigerians are reeling under poverty line. Anyway, to help is good

Unbelievable story which only little minds can jump into conclusion. IT MAY BE A SET-UP: ONE PASTOR AGAINST ANOTHER. LET'S WATCH STORY PART 2.

Having complex, cowardly acts, fear of loosing her to someone else, and a man not playing his own card right to a woman, living a double-faced life, jealousy, callousness and stupidity among many negative reasons could be the reason why the unknown car dealer could take the life of a human being.

He is a murderer and as such should face the full wrath of law.

Stupid man. Idiot.

He deserve to be hanged to teach lessons to women brutalizers in Nigeria and Africa in general. I hate such violence. It's uncivil, primitive and insensible.

Thank you Naija pals forumites.

From,
The Igbo man
Munich, Germany

Brother,

I am not a regular writer but a reader of most contributions made by reasonable people here. A lot are turn offs, but on this issue, all the commentators here sound reasonable.

Ochendo summarized it for you and more interestingly from the ladies mouths.

Experience had it that this ur girl may have somebody she needs but hold you as spare in case the light dims.

It depends on what you want in your life. Marriage is not dating, but TOGETHERNESS in raw form, day-in-day-out. It is not a limited affair but a limitless commitment. If you love her more than she does and worst of it, not ready to show remorse. For sure, she has her faults and good sides, but young man, open your eyes.

A word is enough for the wise.

Take care and bye for now.

From
the Igboman
Munich, Germany

Thank you men of reasoning here.

Bye.

from
Chris, Munich, Germany