phyukingkris i think dat shld b ur phyukin new name. krisphyuker krisANUS FCK..R8)

mr don wat are u phyuking feelin like? who d phyuk named u don self?

wat do cool fm gat 2 do wit dis , abeg no bring wazobia join

kris wat eva d phyuk ur name is.... who d phyuk are u calling dis girl, if u try dat phyukin shit again i swear i will beat d phyukin daylight out of ur dumb phyuking head. fatherphyuker

wat d phyuk are u guys doin here? and just2sexy who phyuking asked u to re edit d topic of d joke u motherphyuker

Perhaps one of the most interesting and colorful words in the English language today is the word "phyuk".
It is the one just by its sound, can describe pain, pleasure, love, and hate.
In language, "phyuk" falls into many grammatical categories.
It can be used as a verb, both transitive (John phyuked Mary) and intra...nsitive (Mary was phyuked by John).
It can be an action verb (Mary phyuks like a rabbit), A passive verb (Mary really doesn't give a phyuk), an adverb (Mary is phyuking interested in John), or as a noun (Mary is a terrific phyuk).
It can also be used as an adjective (Mary is phyuking beautiful) or an interjection (phyuk! I'm late for my date with Mary).
It can even be used as a conjunction (Mary is easy, phyuk she's also stupid). As you can see, there are very few words with the overall versatility of the word "phyuk". Aside from its segxwal connotations, this incredible word can be used to describe many situations:
1. Fraud "I got phyuked by the car dealer."
2. Resignation "Oh, phyuk it!"
3. Trouble "I guess I'm phyuked now."
4. Aggression "phyuk YOU!"
5. Disgust "phyuk me."
6. Confusion "What the phyuk.......?"
7. Difficulty "I don't understand this phyuking business!"
8. Despair "phyuked again..."
9. Pleasure "I phyuking couldn't be happier."
10. Displeasure "What the phyuk is going on here?"
11. Lost "Where the phyuk are we."
12. Disbelief "UNphyukINGBELIEVABLE!"
13. Retaliation "Up your phyuking ass!"
14. Denial "I didn't phyuking do it."
15. Perplexity "I know phyuk all about it."
16. Apathy "Who really gives a phyuk, anyhow?"
17. Greetings "How the phyuk are ya?"
18. Suspicion "Who the phyuk are you?"
19. Panic "Let's get the phyuk out of here."
20. Directions "phyuk off."
21. Disbelief "How the phyuk did you do that?"
It can be used in an anatomical description- "He's a phyuking A*#S."
It can be used to tell time- "It's five phyuking thirty."
It can be used in business- "How did I wind up with this phyuking job?"
It can be maternal- "Motherphyuker."
It can be political- "phyuk Clinton!"
It has also been used by many notable people throughout history:
"What the phyuk was that?" Mayor of Hiroshima
"Where did all these phyuking Indians come from?" General Custer
"Where the phyuk is all this water coming from?" Captain of the Titanic
"That's not a real phyuking gun." John Lennon
"Who's gonna phyuking find out?" Richard Nixon
"Heads are going to phyuking roll." Anne Boleyn
"Who let the phyuking woman drive?" Commander of Space Shuttle Challenger
"What phyuking map?" Mark Thatcher
"Any phyuking idiot could understand that." Albert Einstein
"phyuk STELA DON DIE" OBJ
"It does so phyuking look like her!" Picasso
"How the phyuk did you work that out?" Pythagoras
"You want what on the phyuking ceiling?" Michaelangelo
"na the phyuk phyuk dey sweet dem pass" Fela
"phyuk a duck." Walt Disney
"Why?- Because its phyuking there!" Edmund Hilary
"I don't suppose its gonna phyuking rain?" Joan of Arc
"Scattered phyuking showers my ass." Noah
"For phyuk sakes STOP phyukING phyuk" PRETTYB4EVA

A woman decides to have a facelift for her 50th birthday. She spends $15,000 and feels pretty good about the results.
 
On her way home, she stops at a newsstand to buy a newspaper..
 
Before leaving, she says to the clerk, 'I hope you don't mind my asking, but how old do you think I am
 
'About 32,' is the reply.'
 
'Nope! I'm exactly 50,' the woman says happily.
 
A little while later she goes into McDonald's and asks the counter girl the very same question.
 
The girl replies, 'I'd guess about 29.'
 
The woman replies with a big smile, 'Nope, I'm 50.'

Now she's feeling really good about herself. She stops in a drug store on her way down the street.
 
She goes up to the counter to get some mints and asks the clerk this burning question.
 
The clerk responds, 'Oh, I'd say 30.'
 
Again she proudly responds, 'I'm 50, but thank you!'
 
While waiting for the bus to go home, she asks an old man waiting next to her the same question.
 
He replies, ' Lady, I'm 78 and my eyesight is going.  Although, when I was young there was a sure-fire way to tell how old a woman was.
 
It sounds very forward, but it requires you to let me put my hands under your bra.  Then, and only then can I tell you EXACTLY how old you are.'
 
They wait in silence on the empty street until her curiosity gets the best of her.
 
She finally blurts out, 'What the hell, go ahead.'
 
He slips both of his hands under her blouse and begins to feel around very slowly and carefully. He bounces and weighs each Bosom  and he gently pinches each nipple.
 
He pushes her Bosom s together and rubs them against each other.
 
After a couple of minutes of this, she says, 'Okay, okay....How old am I?'
 
He completes one last squeeze of her Bosom s, removes his hands, and says, 'Madam, you are 50.'
 
Stunned and amazed, the woman says, 'That was incredible, how could you tell?'
 
The old man says, 'Promise you won't get mad?'
 
'I promise I won't' she says.
 
'I was behind you at McDonalds.'

 

thanks sha

no but i get belle

just2sexy abeg tell me dem dey carry belle on top of belle?

Three guys were on a trip to Saudi Arabia. One day, they came upon this harem with over 100 beautiful women. They started getting friendly with all the women, when suddenly the Sheik came in. "I am the master of all these women. No one else can touch them except me. You three men must pay for what you have done to...day. You will each be punished, and in a way corresponding to your profession."

The sheik turns to the first man and asks him what he does for a living.

"I'm a cop", says the first man. "Alright, shoot his penis off", said the sheik. He then turned to the second man and asked him what he did for a living.

"I'm a fireman", said the second man. "Alright, burn his penis off", said the sheik.

Finally, he asked the last man, "And you, what do you do for a living?"

And the third man answered, with a big smile on his face, "I'm a lollipop salesman!"

wat i said is dat u guys shld take a break, hav a kit kat.lol

toks hav not tasted it b4 oh and pls which place are u guys talkin abt

ok just2sexy mayb u hav seen it b4 and orders havnt seen it b4, so y not let dem enjoy it and thanks 4 not callin me newbie i no gbadu dat name at all and i bet u havnt seen d pics i posted wit d joke b4

ro thanks oh i will try sha 

Little J went up 2 his fada & askd him,"Dad,wot is d diff btw potentialy and realisticaly?" D fada tot 4 a moment,den ans'd, "Go ask ur moda if she wld sleep
wit Robert Redford 4 $1m. Den ask ur sis if she wld sleep wit Brad Pitt for $1m, & ask ur broda if he'd sleep wit Tom Cruise 4 $1m.... Come back & tell me wot u learnt."
So little J went to his moda & askd, "Wld u sleep wit Robert Redford 4 $1m?"
D moda replied, "Of course I wld! I wldn't pass up an opportunity like dat."
J den went 2 his sis & askd,"Wld u sleep wit Brad Pitt 4 $1m?" D girl replied,"Oh absolutely,I'd just luv 2 do dat 4 free!" Den he went 2 his broda & askd, Wld u sleep wit Tom Cruise 4 $1m?" ''Of course,"d broda replied."Do u knw wot $1m cld buy?" Johnny pondered,den went back 2 his dad. His fada askd him,"Did u find out d diff btw potentialy & realistically? Little J replied,"Yes sir.Potentially,we're sitting on $3m,but realisticaly,we're living with 2 sluts & a fag.Read More

e yi eki egege na e mi omo si oyibo abi black orkposo, orlor di simbi abi television
elor e hwe varay ah na.    lol

thanks guys

Two little boys playing in a park find a condom. They take it to show their mum. She gets really angry telling them its dirty and not to touch things they find. One boy says to other one, mum was really angry about that ballon. Yeah says the other on...e, we'd better not tell her we ate the yoghurt out of it!