typical nigerians

There was a guy in a bar one night that got really drunk, I mean really, really, really drunk. When the bar closed he got up to go home. As he stumbled out the door he saw a nun walking on the sidewalk. So he stumbled over to the nun and punched her in the face. Well the nun was really surprised but before she could do or say anything he punched her again. This time she fell down and he stumbled over to her and kicked her in the butt. Then he picked her up and threw her into a wall. By this time the nun was pretty weak and couldn't move. So then he stumbled over to her, put his face right next to hers and said. "Not very strong tonight, are you Batman?"

A man walks into the front door of a bar. He is obviously drunk and staggers up to the bar, seats himself on a stool and, with a belch, asks the bartender for a drink. The bartender politely informs the man that it appears he has already had plenty to drink and that he could not be served additional liquor. The bartender offers to call a cab for him.

The drunk is briefly surprised, then softly scoffs, grumbles, climbs down from the bar stool, and staggers out the front door. A few minutes later, the same drunk stumbles in the side door of the bar. He wobbles up to the bar and hollers for a drink. The bartender comes over and - still politely if not more firmly - refuses service to the man and again offers to call a cab. The drunk looks at the bartender for a moment angrily, curses, and shows himself out the side door, all the while grumbling and shaking his head.

A few minutes later, the same drunk bursts in through the back door of the bar. He plops himself up on a bar stool, gathers his wits and belligerently orders a drink. The bartender comes over and emphatically reminds the man that he is drunk and will be served no drinks. He then tells him that he can either call a cab or the police immediately.

The surprised drunk looks at the bartender and in hopeless anguish cries, "Man! How many bars do you work at?"

How many women does it take to change a light bulb?
11 - 10 to form a committee and 1 to get her boyfriend to do it...


How many men does it take to please a woman.
Impossible. u  wan  die


Whats d difference between a beer n a woman
a beer  is always a virgin, u are d first 2 open it

1. Between the ages of 16 and 18, she is like Africa, virgin and unexplored.
2. Between the ages of 19 and 35, she is like Asia, hot and exotic.
3. Between the ages of 36 and 45, she is like America, fully explored, breathtakingly beautiful, and free with her resources.
4. Between the ages of 46 and 56, she is like Europe, exhausted but still has points of interest.
5. After 56 she is like Australia, everybody knows it's down there but who gives a damn?

u try sha

two  women met in hell  n among  gnashing of  teeth this conversation ensued

1st woman; wat brought u here
2nd woman; curiosity
1st woman; how
2nd woman;well, i came earlier than  usual cos  i tut my  husband was having an affair n wanted to catch
                him  unaware, wen i went  in i knew the bitch was hiding  somewhere so i checked everywhere i
                cud
                but  cudnt get her.after bout 10 mins of  searching my  husband suddenly ran 2 the fridge as if to
                get a beer,ran back n smashed my head n i died
                   
1st woman; well he was late, if  u or  himself had cum 2 that fridge earlier, we both wud still be alive

A big-game hunter went on safari with his wife and mother-in- law. One evening, while still deep in the jungle, the Mrs. awoke to find her mother gone. Rushing to her husband, she insisted on them both trying to find her mother.

The hunter picked up his rifle, took a swig of whiskey, and started to look for her. In a clearing not far from the camp, they came upon a chilling sight: the mother-in-law was backed up against a thick, impenetrable bush, and a large male lion stood facing her. The wife cried, "What are we going to do?"

"Nothing," said the hunter husband. "The lion got herself into this mess, let him get herself out of it."

tesh-tesh,  kparaga, monkey tail, gbago  oboy u 4get many names

how is it possible that a dumb man told a deaf man that a blind man saw a cripple cross the road to help a barren woman carry her child? tis cos they all serve a living GOD! u all pals n friends shouild expect a miracle this ember season. loveknight.

a private jet with a damaged engine thousands of feet above the ground has a 2 pilots, a politician, his son a school boy.the boy was supposed to be taken to a foreign school.since there was only 3 parachutes for 4 persons,the politician hurriedly took off first having in mind the pilots wont leave his son.the boy noticed and informed the pilots his father just stole his school bag

gifts like condoms abi,strip dancers indeed,aids is real e no dey show 4 strip dancers body

You see this young lad walks out of a store and sees an elderly man sitting on a bench crying. This young lad walks over to the man to check to see if he is O.k.!
Young Lad: Sir, are you Okay?

Old Man: Yes, it's my birthday today (and he is still crying)

Young Lad: Wow, it's a special day for you.

Old Man.: Yes it is. I'm 82 today (and still crying.)

Young Lad: Even better, you look great for your age.

Old Man: Thank you, and I just got married (and he is still crying.)

Young Lad: Married!! Gee, that's great! 82 and married, wow! You've got a whole new life ahead of you.

Old Man: I married a 25 year old.

Young Lad: Holly Molly!! Even better.

Old Man: We have sex every day! (he's till crying)

Young Lad: I don't even have sex everyday, you lucky person you.

Old Man: Yes, I am, and I've forgotten where I lived

old joke bobby find new 1.dis is like 20 years old joke

u miss d koko

he is not a complete man

none of them agree they married the right man any longer, they are never satisfied

a boy once asked his father how he could identify a drunk man,the dad pointed @ d table n said u c see those 3 cups there,a drunk man will tell u they are six.the boy looked n saw 1 cup[/b]