to define what I thought women
meant when they say they look for
confidence in a man. Why do so
many women say they find
confidence attractive and yet find the brash brother arrogance so off-
putting? What is the difference? And
how do you go about being
confident, when you’re not a very
extroverted person? The answer is quite simple, but not
that easy to internalise, which is I
guess why a lot of men looking to
impress women turn to dating
advice sites that are often rife with
pick up artist tricks and techniques. The problem with this type of thing
is that even though it sometimes
works – especially in the short run –
the entire concept is based on
trickery and faking. And there is
something undeniably icky about falsifying your personality to get
someone to like you. Sure, I know - everybody does it to
some extent. Obviously when you
want someone to like you, whether
it’s for a date or a job interview, you
want to present your best self. BUT
– the key here is that it still has to be yourself. And that for me is the crux:
confidence is about authenticity. Confidence is being your true self,
the self you are at your core. Even if
that self is shy, a bit awkward or an
introvert. Think of the difference
between a nervous teenager who
hasn’t really developed his personality yet and a nervous adult
who has. Confidence is being in
touch with your own disaster, and
liking yourself despite your flaws. If you accept, appreciate and
empathise with yourself, chances
are other people will too. Being
confident is having enough self-
worth and self-knowledge to know
that people will find you interesting, lovable and worthy of love, despite
your shortcomings and mistakes. I’ve asked the others around the
office how they define confidence
and this is what they said. Aneeqah: When he’s comfortable being himself around you and
everyone else. Marisa: I would say confidence in the sense that the man is not clingy,
he trusts you to go your own way.
He is not jealous or over protective.
He is confident in you and your
relationship that he backs off when
he needs to and is there when he needs to be. Carmen: Confidence is honesty, authenticity and wanting something
enough to try for it. Whether he’s
shy, or a little brash. I think it’s also
knowing yourself well enough to ask
for what you want. Caira-Lee: Some men overcompensate by being overly
confident...that’s not sexy. Sexy
confidence: a firm handshake,
humour and the ability to laugh at
himself. Confidence has direction. A
goal. And the ability to know which tools to use to reach that goal. Chanté: I think it’s in their kindness, gentleness and pureness
of heart. One of the things I look for
in a man is their ability to respect
the spirit world and to think with his
heart. It takes a lot to do this
because it takes a lot to be that confident in your own soul.
| Posted: at | |
moralemike07
TRENDING GISTS 
Suspected Sextortion Blackmailer, Olamide Made £2m Vows To Release Embarrassing PIC/VID Of Boys
VIDEO; "Grammy Don Cast, Make We Manage Headies" – BBnaija’s Whitemoney
Crystal Palace v Manchester Utd: English Premier League Match,Team News,Goal Scorers and Stats
Heartbroken Father Mourns His 14yr Old Daughter Who Was Reportedly Poisoned in School
Nigeria's VP, Shettima Departs Abuja For 2024 US-Africa Business Summit in Dallas
Yvonne Jegede Reveals The Truth About Colleague, Mercy Johnson, While Calling Her Out (Video)