THE LAST KID STANDING

Date: 29-10-2011 11:32 am (12 years ago) | Author: D bwoi in d block
[1] 2 3 4 ... 12
- at 29-10-2011 11:32 AM (12 years ago)
(m)
These are from a book called Disorder in the American Courts, and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

Q: Are you segxwally active?
A: No, I just lie there.
__________________________________
... Q: What is your date of birth?
A: July 15th.
Q: What year?
A: Every year. __________________________________
Q: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
A: Gucci sweats and Reeboks. _______________________________________
Q: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
A: Yes.
Q: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A: I forget.
Q: You forget? Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten? _____________________________________ Q: How old is your son, the one living with you?
A: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
Q: How long has he lived with you?
A: Forty-five years. ______________________________________ Q: What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke up that morning?
A: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Q: And why did that upset you?
A: My name is Susan. ______________________________________ Q: Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or the occult?
A: We both do.
Q: Voodoo? A: We do.
Q: You do?
A: Yes, voodoo. __________________________________
Q: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning? A: Did you actually pass the bar exam? __________________________________
Q: The youngest son, the twenty-year-old, how old is he? __________________________________
Q: Were you present when your picture was taken? __________________________________
Q: So the date of conception of your baby was August 8th?
A: Yes.
Q: And what were you doing at that time? __________________________________
Q: She had three children, right?
A: Yes.
Q: How many were boys?
A: None.
Q: Were there any girls? __________________________________
Q: How was your first marriage terminated?
A: By death.
Q: And by whose death was it terminated? ______________________________________ Q: Can you describe the individual?
A: He was about medium height and had a beard.
Q: Was this a male, or a female? __________________________________
Q: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney? A: No, this is how I dress when I go to work. ______________________________________ Q: Doctor, how many autopsies have you performed on dead people? A: All my autopsies are performed on dead people. __________________________________
Q: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?
A: Oral. __________________________________
Q: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
A: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
Q: And Mr. Dennington was dead at the time?
A: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy. __________________________________
Q: Are you qualified to give a urine sample? __________________________________
Q: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?
A: No.
Q: Did you check for blood pressure? A: No.
Q: Did you check for breathing?
A: No.
Q: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
A: No.
Q: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
A: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
Q: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
A: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law somewhere.

Posted: at 29-10-2011 11:32 AM (12 years ago) | Upcoming
- jeffrey4u at 29-10-2011 12:26 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
ok
Posted: at 29-10-2011 12:26 PM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
Reply
- Ak33m at 29-10-2011 06:14 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
you sure?
Posted: at 29-10-2011 06:14 PM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
Reply
- jaolab at 30-10-2011 02:03 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
it was ok at inception but latter u miss the arrangement
Posted: at 30-10-2011 02:03 PM (12 years ago) | Upcoming
Reply
- jeffrey4u at 30-10-2011 05:51 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
ok
Posted: at 30-10-2011 05:51 PM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
Reply
- Skypon2002 at 30-10-2011 08:14 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
boko haram  Undecided Undecided

Posted: at 30-10-2011 08:14 PM (12 years ago) | Addicted Hero
Reply
- jeffrey4u at 30-10-2011 09:00 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
 Tongue Tongue Tongue
Posted: at 30-10-2011 09:00 PM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
Reply
- Skypon2002 at 30-10-2011 09:40 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
boko haram  Undecided Undecided

Posted: at 30-10-2011 09:40 PM (12 years ago) | Addicted Hero
Reply
- mixbrown at 30-10-2011 10:16 PM (12 years ago)
(f)
BRB Cool
Posted: at 30-10-2011 10:16 PM (12 years ago) | Upcoming
Reply
- jeffrey4u at 30-10-2011 10:28 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
ok
Posted: at 30-10-2011 10:28 PM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
Reply
- Skypon2002 at 30-10-2011 10:48 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
boko haram  Undecided Undecided

Posted: at 30-10-2011 10:48 PM (12 years ago) | Addicted Hero
Reply
- Ak33m at 31-10-2011 12:08 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
hahahahahahaha
haram dey col person boko
Posted: at 31-10-2011 12:08 PM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
Reply
- Skypon2002 at 31-10-2011 08:51 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
boko haram  Undecided Undecided

Posted: at 31-10-2011 08:51 PM (12 years ago) | Addicted Hero
Reply
- Ak33m at 31-10-2011 10:48 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
make i go slp oooooo
Posted: at 31-10-2011 10:48 PM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
Reply
- jeffrey4u at 31-10-2011 10:54 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
hmmm
Posted: at 31-10-2011 10:54 PM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
Reply
- Skypon2002 at 31-10-2011 11:38 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
boko haram  Undecided Undecided

Posted: at 31-10-2011 11:38 PM (12 years ago) | Addicted Hero
Reply
- Splendidndy at 1-11-2011 09:47 AM (12 years ago)
(m)
JAMB QUESTIONS
Posted: at 1-11-2011 09:47 AM (12 years ago) | Upcoming
Reply
- giftmurphy at 1-11-2011 11:09 AM (12 years ago)
(f)
hmmn
Posted: at 1-11-2011 11:09 AM (12 years ago) | Hero
Reply
- Ak33m at 1-11-2011 12:30 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
 Kiss Kiss Kiss Kiss Kiss
Posted: at 1-11-2011 12:30 PM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
Reply
- Emmagency9 at 1-11-2011 12:36 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
mtcheeew

Posted: at 1-11-2011 12:36 PM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
Reply
[1] 2 3 4 ... 12

fire TRENDING GISTS fire

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