One Mr. Adejo Emmanuel, a widower from the Igala speaking part of Kogi state, has cried out over the treatments he got from his in-laws from Akenze, Ebonyi State following his wife’s demise.
Emmanuel’s wife, Margaret, had given up the ghost few hours after delivery.
According to The Nation, Emmanuel has been ordered by his in-laws to fulfil a vital aspect of their culture before the burial ceremonies would commence.
While lamenting his predicament, Emmanuel said, “My life is like a balloon that was punctured with a pin, which immediately deflated it of all the joy. When a woman is pregnant the prayer is to hear the babies’ cries and that of the mother’s joy; but now the mother is gone, leaving the babies.”
Emmanuel, a peasant farmer, said as if the agony of mourning his wife was not enough, his late wife’s family members sent a message to him that he had to obey their custom and tradition by performing certain rituals and rites.
“Chief among these rites includes performing the mandatory marriage ceremonies with my deceased wife, an activity we didn’t perform while Margaret was alive. Without that, they told me that I will be barred from coming to my wife’s village and I won’t be allowed to bury her corpse.
“I have been called upon to go through wedding ceremonies with my wife’s corpse.
“Coming from Igala ethnic background, this is rather bizarre and unimaginable. I don’t know what went wrong and I don’t know my sin. I was preparing for the safe delivery of my wife and a successful naming ceremony for the babies; not knowing that I had another thing coming,” he lamented.
“My wife went into labour and was delivered of the twin girls. She was attended to by Traditional Birth Attendants, but the placenta did not come out. We quickly got her into a vehicle and headed for the General Hospital at Oke-Ogun in Owo. Unfortunately she did not make it, as she gave up the ghost at the entrance of the hospital. I noticed that her condition had worsened and she was getting dizzy. She thus got to the hospital, dead.
“To say the least, I was devastated. I became confused and almost ran mad.
Emmanuel of No 44, Igboroko Nla Street, added that a good Samaritan, one Mrs. Femisola Akilamilo, a prophetess who is also called Mother of Children (Iya Ewe) in her Cherubim and Seraphim Church, is taking care of the twins.
Speaking further, Emmanuel said, “The family of my late wife has asked me to come and do marriage ceremonies with my wife and come up with the sum of 350,000 naira before anything could even take off. Where would I get the money from? I am confused. They should pity my condition and understand that I’m still taking care of the children. Three of them are in secondary school, not to talk of the twins.
“I have no money to pay for the mortuary; I also have no money to feed the children; and my in-laws are demanding for the death certificate of their daughter, which they say I must bring along whenever I am coming. They also say it is compulsory for me to come over and do a compulsory marriage with her before she could be buried.
“They say some rituals must be performed and 350,000 naira must be paid to her family as part of her bride-price, before talking about the burial at all. Where do I get the money from? Am I not in trouble now?”
When asked how he met his wife, Emmanuel said, “You can meet your wife anywhere, so far there is love and the woman agrees to marry you. I am from Idah in Igala, Kogi State, and we met here in Owo, Ondo State. I never knew this is what I would face.
“My in-laws don’t even want to entertain or listen to any excuse or explanation; all they care about is for me to fulfil all the necessary requirements,” Emmanuel lamented.
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Posted: at 14-02-2016 05:59 PM (8 years ago) | Addicted Hero
Ennyolalekan at 14-02-2016 06:37 PM (8 years ago) (m)
what a wicked world
Posted: at 14-02-2016 06:37 PM (8 years ago) | Gistmaniac
It's a normal thing. Though they should have been considerate. My colleague that was married to an Akwa ibom woman did the same when the woman died during child labor. He didn't Marry her when she was alive. That's the tradition but I suggest that they should bring down the whole cost, for the sake of the man. It's a lesson for couples who cohabit without proper marriage.
Posted: at 14-02-2016 09:55 PM (8 years ago) | Gistmaniac
Dont blame the man alone. Why did the woman lived with a man that has not paid her bride price talk less of given birth to about 3 children for him? l agree that it is culture and should be respected. But it culture mandatory? Many have waited till 30-35-40-yrs before they got married bcos the culture is demanding so much from them and working their life hard to meet up with the culture demand. Culture should give room for its people happiness to be proud of it not to make life miserable for its people. For exple, a cousin of mine cut off a wedding because the culture is demanding over N700,000 for bride price + gift items. This exclude the ceremonial expenses. That is why we get too late to get married.
Posted: at 15-02-2016 06:09 AM (8 years ago) | Gistmaniac
They would have been considerate when she was alive. How will this mad man cohabit wit a woman for that long without doing the right tins. I believe some of u here talking nonsense will one day have children then when one yeye man impregnates your daughter and before u know it another belle don enta you will understand how it feels. Many men have done that and the woman you won't expect to go back to her parent's house after the shame she brought upon her family. I also know she would have been begging the man to go and see her family. Truth is that it's not about money but the family is pained and want to punish him
Posted: at 15-02-2016 07:12 AM (8 years ago) | Upcoming
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