Both parents should be jailed. stupid mother...........
 

GUYS, WE ARE TALKING ABOUT MAKING PEOPLE LAUGH, U DONT HAVE TO SEND ABUSIVE WORDS HERE. CAREFUL, MILLIONS OF PEOPLE READ ALL THESE THINGS U POST HERE. TAKE CAUTION. MAKE PEOPLE HAPPY N NOT ABUSE MOTHERS.......CIAO

ME DONATE DIESEL SO THAT THEM NO GO SMELL, BECOS WE NO GO SEE ANYTHING AFTER THE BURNING...HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHA

A wife came home early and found her husband in their bedroom making love to a very attractive young woman and she was somewhat upset. 'You are a disrespectful pig!' she cried. 'How dare you do this to me – a faithful wife, the mother of your children! I'm leaving you. I want a divorce right away!'   And the husband replied, 'Hang on just a minute love so at least I can tell you what happened.' 'Fine, go ahead,' she sobbed,' but they'll be the last words you'll say to me!'  And the husband began -- 'Well, I was getting into the car to drive home, and this young lady here asked me for a lift. She looked so down and out and defense that I took pity on her and let her into the car. I noticed that she was very thin, not well dressed and very dirty. She told me that she hadn't eaten for three days. So, in my compassion, I brought her home and warmed up the enchiladas I made for you last night, the ones you wouldn't eat because you're afraid you'll put on weight. The poor thing devoured them in moments. Since she needed a good clean-up, suggested a shower, and while she was doing that, I noticed her clothes were dirty and full of holes, so I threw them away.  Then, as she needed clothes, I gave her the designer jeans that you have had for a few years, but don't wear because you say they are too tight l also gave her the underwear that was your anniversary present, which you don't wear because I don't have good taste. I found the sexy blouse my sister gave you for Christmas that you don't wear just to annoy her, and I also donated those boots you bought at the expensive boutique and don't wear because someone at work has a pair the same. The husband took a quick breath and continued –'She was so grateful for my understanding and helps as I walked her to the door, she turned to me with tears in her eyes and said..... Please ......do you have anything else that your wife doesn't use?

Bakari is a house boy who every day drinks the wine of his Boss and puts water in the bottle to replace what he drank. But the Boss was suspicious and decided to buy pastis (a French wine that changes colour if you add water).

Bakari as usual, drank from the wine and topped it up with water (to replace what he drank).

But unfortunately for him, immediately he added water the pastis became milky. And when the Boss came back and noticed it, he knew he had nailed Bakari. Bakari also knew that he was in trouble and decided to stay put in the kitchen when his boss came home.

The Boss told his wife and said he would call Bakari to come and acknowledge his evil ways.

"Bakari!", he called from the sitting room.

Bakari answered: "Yes, Boss".

"Who drank my pastis?".

No answer.

The Boss asked again: still no answer.
Then the Boss went to the kitchen to meet him there: "Are you insane or what? Why when I call you you say "yes boss" but when I ask you a question you don't answer me? "
Bakari retorted that "when you are in the kitchen you don't understand anything at all, except your name"

"Is that so?" asked the boss, "Okay, you stay beside Madam, while I'll go in the kitchen, and you will ask me a question ".

Bakari accepted.

The Boss went in the kitchen and Bakari shouted: "Boss".

He answered: "Yes, Bakari".

"Who goes into the maid's bedroom when the Madam is not there? "

No answer.

Bakari shouted again: "Boss, I say who made the maid pregnant?"

No answer.

Third time; "Boss, I say who made the maid pregnant?"

The Boss runs back from the kitchen shouting "Wonders will never cease! Bakari, It is true, when one is in the kitchen, one does not hear anything, except one's name ".

A young man goes into a pharmacy and says to the pharmacist?? > "Hello, could you give me condom ..............??I'm going to my girlfriends for dinner and I think I may be in with a chance!"?
The pharmacist gives him the condom and as the young man is going out he returns and says, "Give me another condom
because my girlfriend's sister is very cute too. She always
crosses her legs in a provocative manner when she sees me
and I think I might strike it lucky there too."
The pharmacist gives him a second condom and as the boy is
leaving he turns back and says "Go on, give me one more
condom because my girlfriend's mum is still pretty cute and
when she sees me she always makes eyes and since she invited me for dinner I think she is expecting me to make a move?  During dinner, the young man is sitting with his girlfriend on his left, the sister on his right and the mum facing him. When the dad gets there, the boy lowers his head and starts the dinner prayer.
"Dear Lord, bless this dinner and thank you for all you
gave us".
A minute later the boy is still praying "Thank you Lord for
your kindness.”Ten minutes go by and the boy is still
praying, keeping his head down. The others look at each other surprised and his girlfriend is even more surprised
than the others. She gets close to the boy and says in his ear, "I didn't know you were so religious."
The boy replies, "I didn't know your dad was a
 pharmacist!"....

OBASANJO,IBB & ATIKU were on a plane. OBJ said, I can throw N1000 note down & make someone happy. IBB said I can throw 2 N500 notes  & make 2 people happy. Atiku said I can throw 5 N200 notes & make 5 people happy. The pilot heard them & said to himself, "Idiots" , I can throw all 3 of u down & make 150million people happy....PLZ VOTE WISELY 2011!