Mr. ikulomejakako's Son: Dad, what is the spelling of successful....is it one c or two c?
Mr. ikulomejakako: Make it three c to be sure!

Colleague: Sorry I'm late. I got stuck in an elevator for 4 hrs because of a power failure.
Mr. ikulomejakako: That's alright, me too...I got stuck on the escalator for 3 hrs.

Friend: How was the tape you borrowed from me, is it Ok?
Mr. ikulomejakako: What do you mean ok, I thought it's a horror film. I didn't see any picture.

Friend: What tape did you took anyway?
Mr. ikulomejakako: Head Cleaner.

Friend: How many women do you believe must a man marry?

Mr. ikulomejakajo : 16

Friend: Why?
Mr. ikulomeakako: Because the priest says 4 richer, 4 poorer, 4 better and 4worse.

mrdon u no go return that lapy if d owner come nw u go dey beg am

go sleep

Teacher: What is 5 plus 4?
Mr. Bean: 9

Teacher: What is 4 plus 5?
Mr. Bean: Are you trying to fool me, you've just twisted the figure, the answer is 6!!

BRAIN TUMOR:
Doctor: I regret to tell you that you have a brain tumor.
Mr. Bean: Yesss!!! (jumps in joy)

Doctor: Did you understand what I just told you?
Mr. Bean: Yes of course, do you think I'm dumb?

Doctor: Then why are you so happy?
Mr. Bean: Because that proves that I have a brain!

mr sule

na me n u no be so

mrdon u don forget say na 32face no be 16 as u said

brother sule no comment

Hello, can anyone please help me find any living relatives of my wife whos father ikulomejakako  was born in ile  ife, osun state in1921 but moved to gbagi after the war. We would like to visit osun state  next year so that my wife can see where her father was raised and perhaps meet her relatives. Thank you for reading this, I would apreciate any information.

After I completed the Spire quest and returned home after the 10 year period, I was unable to find my wife any where, and my child had grown up but only stood in once spot where the crib used to be, and no matter what I couldn't interact with her. And after so long I came back to the town and my daughter came running up to me, but there's still no sign of my wife, yet my kid and everyone else acknowledge her as if she's there. Can anyone give any helpful information? Such as a way to get a divorce, or something?

no na 4face

complete am u dis black racist

u r a black racist

can some1 help me o i forget my head at my girlfriend's house n i won go shoppin i dey hungry hw i go do am plz help

A rolling stone -> Na person push am
A stitch in time -> Dey avoid futher tear tear
Birds of the same feather -> Na de same mama
One good turn -> Na power steering be dat
A friend in need -> Na long throat kill am
A bird in hand -> Na chops be dat

 
I did not come to England to take pictures of Big Ben or tour London Bridge. I just wanted to get paid and get even with those colonials. With a name like Ogundele Kayode Omobrukutu, I could not even buy a bus pass let alone open a bank account. This is my story....
It took me 6 months to study the system, but I still could not figure out my squares and circus's. I could not travel from Leicester Circus to Oxford Square without getting lost. I was a YMCA (Young Money Chasing African) when I joined the FRAUD (Fine Rich Africans United in Deals). It took me 3 months to attain my ACCA (Advanced Certificate for Criminal Africans) and I needed an MBA (Major Bank Account) to do my first HND (Heavy Nigerian Deal). I arranged to meet this guy at Animal and Something, I mean Elephant and Castle. We were suppose to meet at 10.00am. I got there at 11.30am and he turned up at 1.30pm. He pulled up in a Mercedes 500SL with a private number plate - 419 ADE. He was a definite Nigerian, he had it all - leather jacket in summer, air condition on full blast with his roof and windows down whilst smoking cigar and choking on his smoke just to impress me.
Being a fellow Nigerian I was more than impressed. He introduced himself as Adepujo Kunle Babatunde and asked me to call him Ade or Babs. He spoke with a strong Nigerian accent but he messed the whole language up by slanging he sounded like a Canadian born Chinese living in Germany and studying French. I had not been in the country for long but I could tell that Omo(my man) was trying hard to be British. After hanging with Ade for about 2 months I became an OBE (Opportunist Bank Employee) and specialised in BBC (Breaking Bank Codes). Money was flowing and I wanted more so I did my PhD (Passport Handling Degree) and became an FBI(Fraudster Bringing Immigrants). My status changed drastically...., I had a BMW 328is convertible and a Porsche 911 with a private plate - 911 OMO and living in a council flat and signing on. I went to Moonlighting every Friday and drank champagne and danced to music supplied by DJ Pace and Skills. I became foolish - I remember one night I spent over a 1000 pounds on just champagne at the club and had no money for petrol so I walked home. My downfall.... Greed and selfishness inevitably led to my downfall - I got involved with a CIA (Cash Investing Agent) and we did a couple of GMTs (Good Money Transfers) but he later turned out to be a CID (Cop in Disguise). I was under surveillance and I did not even know. I left the NHS (Nigerian Housing Scheme) early that morning with about 12 different cheque books to go and do my business. They followed me unto the high road and it was then it hit me that something was wrong. I could not leave all that evidence in my car so I started chewing my cheque books. I ate 8 before they pulled me over. They read me my rights and all that crap and all I could say was - OGA, water please!