I had the good fortune to celebrate a wedding anniversary and birthday last weekend. The former was a quarter of a century and twelve moons as a dear friend so beautifully put it in a card and the latter was five decades and a half.  While the numbers are a little unnerving, they are certainly something to be very proud of.

What is even more significant to me is that I can still remember the emotions I felt on  the day I got married and comparing it to how I feel today about my spouse, the only difference is in the depth, quality and understanding, all of which are much richer, heightened and of a superior quality. I find this indeed something to celebrate. People tend to ask couples who have been married for long periods what their secrets are. I always find it an odd question because by virtue of the word secret, that would suggest it is not something you want to share. Besides, one couple’s successful ingredients may not work for another couple.

We were further blessed to have our wonderful children, close family and dear friends share this happy time with us. As the evening wore on and we got more relaxed and happier (if you know what I mean), the conversations also got more interesting and polarised. There were different camps, some spoke about politics and the state of the nation. While others held dialogue about family life and the difficulties in making ends meet. The camp I belonged (which I considered the most interesting), entered into that murky, complex discourse about how men and women relate.

The two most important questions asked relating to the dynamics between the genders are what do men want from women and what do women want from men? It’s one thing to know the answer and make a decision how to respond to it, however it’s a whole different ball game as it’s mostly the case not to have a clue!

When we strip away all the confusion and complexities of 21st century living where gender roles are not so defined, sometimes tipping the balance to the point of non recognition, there have been and will continue to be some basic primordial impulses and needs between the sexes.

Women primarily want a strong man to protect them, to provide strong genes to father their offspring. Men want a woman with child bearing hips to produce their babies and they want their women to be a mother to the children and to them.

Fast forward to modern day living where we would all agree the story and attitudes are somewhat different. Although some argue that the intentions and needs are really still the same and that is why relations are in so much chaos because coupled are trying to go against the grain and are fighting their basic nature. I am being somewhat of a coward here and putting all cases of the argument in this article, trying not to pitch my tent on any particular side (I will probably fail in this attempt).

Women now appear to be demanding a whole new set of conditions, which focus on economics, segxwal fulfilment or liberation, equality, excitement, risks. Therein lies a lot of the upsets observed in relationships today. On the other hand, men appear to have lost the plot and don’t seem to have a clue to what exactly they want or seem to feel they have endless options, as a result they seem unable to focus on maintaining a stable home.

One of the young gentlemen in my camp said he happened to know a lot of young women who were completely clueless about what it meant to be a wife. Naturally I was intrigued and enquired what his opinion was of what a wife was meant to be. He said he knew of young wives who had no concept of compromise, responsibility and self restraint .He said he had heard women saying they didn’t cook and didn’t see anything wrong with that. He said a lot of the women entered into marriage completely naive about the institution and with the belief that if there were problems in the marriage, they would just up and leave, or the man would have to deal with it.

One of the women (of an older generation), in the discussion said in her opinion she felt men had the emotions of children (regardless of their ages). She said she felt men were ‘easily led, were infantile in their thought process, and seemed to believe that ‘all that glitters was gold’. Asking her to expand on this, she went on to say that she felt that it didn’t take much to convince a man that the ‘grass was greener elsewhere and that they were gullible,’ which was why a lot of men ended up in compromising and messy situations they cannot extricate themselves from.

Another male discussant said his pet peeve was wives withholding sex from their husbands as a means of controlling or punishing them, not fighting fair. He said he felt this was a big mistake women made and it usually did not have the desired effect they thought it would. He said to him it was a deep rejection and left him feeling hurt much longer after the quarrel is over. I’m not sure women should agree to physical intimacy if they are not feeling emotionally good themselves. Women need emotional intimacy in order to make love, while men express emotional intimacy through sex. He also went on to say that he felt involving other person in their marriage was humiliating and felt it was a form of betrayal.

What is evident from these discussions is that men and women are wired differently. A case in point is when a guy calls up his mates and invites them for a pint later on. This is exactly what he means and they hook up for a drink later in the day. When a woman arranges to meet with her girlfriends there is less spontaneity, it takes lots of forward planning (sometimes weeks), and emails (sometimes group emails). Then again she has many more things to consider before she can get away. The challenge for both sexes is to continuously attempt to understand the other’s perspective, compromise when you can’t make head or tail of it and possibly the most important is to talk to each other. You can find out a lot when you just ask. I invite comments and suggestions on this topic. I’m sure readers have a lot to say on it.

sourcewww.olokunbolablessing.blogspot.com

A bride refused to show up at her wedding at the Cathedral Church of Emmanuel, Okesa, Ado-Ekiti, on Saturday resulting in the cancellation of the wedding. The groom, who is from Ifaki-Ekiti in Ido-Osi Local Government Area of the state, was already in the church but waited in vain for the arrival of his bride.

Her whereabouts remain unknown several hours after the service had started...
All efforts to track her down failed. The failure of the bride to show up, it was gathered, forced the clerics to cancel the wedding and invited guests reportedly left one after the other, when it dawned on them that the ceremony would no longer hold.

The Dean of the Cathedral, Very Reverend, F.O Bankole, when contacted on the telephone confirmed the incident to Punch. He said, “It is true that a wedding which was planned to hold in the church today was cancelled. The bride did not show up.”

He said that he did not know why she failed to showed up, but added that the groom and the lady he wanted to marry had been “having some issues since they started courting.”

The groom, his friends and family members later left the venue in shame.

source www.olokunbolablessing.blogspot.com

National Enquirer Magazine This week has on its front cover this very interesting story.
Miracles are definitely happening everyday!

Read the story.

''Many people would almost immediately disregard you, the moment you tell them that you work as a driver, especially in Nigeria. But it’s a whole different ball game, with the driver of silver tongued, stylish man of God, Pastor Chris Oyakhilome, pastor of Believers Love World (BLW). a.k.a Christ Embassy.

His name is Sunshine Samuel Imumholen, apparently hails from the same town with his boss, he is in his late 30’s, and doesn’t  have a degree yet, but National Enquirer scooped that he is under immense pressure from his boss to acquire a degree by all means. So he has enrolled in one of the universities in Lagos state. He lives in a lavish apartment in Magodo G.R.A, where he has fleet of exotic cars. We learnt that he spent well over 20 million naira for his wedding, on the 22nd of March 2013, in Lagos and Aba. He bought a red Rav 4 Jeep for his wife as a wedding, gift, after he had already showered her with car gifts, whilst they were dating.

According to reliable church sources, the first car Pastor Oyakhilome`s driver bought for his wife to be was a white Honda Civic, and then a Silver Ticco Mini Jeep, flew her to London for shopping, and to Dubai for vacation.

We gathered that he actually met his wife at the staff car park and fell in love with the way she took her time to park her car, he walked up to her, told her his intentions, and that was it, like they, say, the rest became history. The wife, Stellamaris  has been overwhelmed since  after marriage, as she keeps posting it on  facebook, and tweeter,” o what more can I ask for, the Lord has done it all” they were in the United States of America, for their honeymoon, and the moment they came back, he surprised her with a white  2009 model of Infinity Jeep. Hnmmm, now I can almost visualize many single ladies fasting and praying for a driver as a life partner. Well, then don’t miss the opportunity, find your way to the church on Sunday, you just might be lucky and win the heart of a driver''.

source www.olokunbolablessing.blogspot.com

The actress and business woman has moved into her multi million Naira home in Lekki. Heard the house has a swimming pool, gym room, private office, car port, garden, massive walk in closet and a state of art interior. Balling!
The all purpose lady recently got a whopping N5 million check for cutting her shaving her hair for a movie role.
Few weeks ago, the actress finalized her divorce from her husband of many years. She is single and ready to mingle.
Tell me is this beautiful lady going to stay in this mansion all by herself? That is left for her to answer.

source www.olokunbolablessing.blogspot.com

 Probably these ladies are dragging something and whatever it is must be very strong. How else do one even start to explain the fact that actress Tonto Dikeh had time to retweet a negative tweet about Linda Ikeji on her inability to find a man to marry her, while she was suppose to be celebrating her birthday?

Whatever is between them, I hope they get over it soon. See the tweet and video below:

source www.olokunbolablessing.blogspot.com

    FILE - This Aug. 29, 2012 file photo shows Paris Jackson, left, daughter of the late pop icon Michael Jackson, poses with a fan outside Jackson's boyhood home during a celebration on what would have been Jackson's 54th birthday in Gary, Ind. Jackson is physically fine after being taken to a hospital early Wednesday, June 5, 2013, an attorney for Jackson's mother said. Perry Sanders Jr. writes in a statement that Paris Jackson is getting appropriate medical attention and the family is seeking privacy. (AP)

LOS ANGELES –  An investigation into Paris Jackson's well-being has been ordered by a judge overseeing the guardianship of Michael Jackson's three children, court records show.

Superior Court Judge Mitchell Beckloff ordered an investigator to look into Paris Jackson's health, education and welfare and recommend whether any changes are necessary on Thursday, one day after she was taken by ambulance from her family's home and hospitalized.

Authorities have said they were dispatched to the home on a report of a possible overdose, but have not released any additional details.

"There have been communications between the court and counsel and we're completely supportive of the court's actions," Katherine Jackson's attorney, Perry Sanders Jr., said Friday.

He has said the 15-year-old is physically fine and receiving appropriate medical treatment. He declined further comment on her health status Friday.

Beckloff issued a similar inquiry into the well-being of Michael Jackson's three children, Prince, Paris and Blanket, last year after an incident in which Katherine Jackson was out of communication with them for several days. The Jackson family matriarch had been taken by some of her children to a resort in Arizona, prompting an agreement that led to another guardian being temporarily instated.

Tito Jackson's son, TJ, was appointed co-guardian over the children.

"This is standard protocol in a high profile case," his attorney Charles Shultz wrote in an email. "The court is doing what we fully expected the court to do."

The earlier report to Beckloff was not made public, although he has stated that he believed Katherine Jackson was doing a good job of raising her son's children.

Beckloff's order requires an investigator to prepare a report that only he will be allowed to review. He did not include instructions on how the review should occur or when the report was due. Last year, Beckloff required an investigator to interview each of the children separately.

The filing was first reported Friday by celebrity website TMZ.

source www.olokunbolablessing.blogspot.com

Police in southern city of Chennai found scapegoats after their new patrol car is damaged.
Aljazeera.com has reported that Three goats were caught and detained by police in the southern Indian city of Chennai after they allegedly vandalised a new police patrol vehicle, the Times of India has reported.
The trio were held as “scapegoats” for the crime which reportedly involved a dozen of their tribe trampling over the car – the latest example of anti-social behaviour in the Kilpauk district of the city.
Police said the goats had a record of damaging vehicles of residents, but had “crossed the line” with an attack on a new patrol vehicle, a maroon Innova. “We got the vehicle two days ago,” said an officer on duty.
According to the complaint, about 12 goats dented the vehicle when they and climbed on top of it, “damaging the wipers and glass, and scratching the paint of the bonnet and body”.
Police however found only three goats in their subsequent inquiries. “We took the animals to the station and made inquiries about the owner,” the officer told the newspaper.
Their owner, Mary Arogynathan, 37, faces charges of negligent conduct of her animals, which were later handed over to the Society for the Protection of Animals.

source www.olokunbolablessing.blogspot.com

After months of playing hide and seek, singer Omawumi finally opened up on how she was impregnated by a man who is not in the entertainment industry at the time her career was taking shape. She admitted that she is not married to him (yet), so she can't be flaunting her baby's daddy as she would love to.

Below is the very interesting chat she had with Seun Apara about her love life...

    I never hid my child's paternity but I felt that since I'm not married, I don't need to come out and say this is the father of my child. It is always ideal for someone who wants to marry you to be the one to identify himself. Another thing is that he might not want to identify himself because he is not an artiste. He might not want that part of my life. He might just love me and my child. So I like to respect people's privacy. 

    I also strongly feel that it is my job as a musician to entertain you and if you feel like my personal life is your business, it doesn't mean I feel the same way.

    Initially when I got pregnant, I didn't feel the need to come out and start telling people that this is the father of my child. I didn't feel I owed it to anyone.

    My family and my close friends know who the father of my child is because we’re in a relationship. We have a very healthy relationship and our families are intertwined. I don't think I need to start telling people all this.

    I felt so bad about the stories people are writing about my child's paternity because normally, controversies don't get to me and my daughter don’t have to be part of this. So when people start putting that kind of stuffs in print and my daughter stumbles upon it when she is old enough to read, it will hurt her.

    Considering the kind of upbringing I had, I'm not that morally bankrupt that I will now fraternize with a married man that is like a father figure to me.

You want to reveal his identity?

    I don't feel that will be necessary. I just want to use this opportunity to tell people that I will try as much as possible to be a normal artiste and I want to encourage people to try and enjoy my music. They should know that I'm a human being and they should try to understand that I tried to be a person that people can look up to.

    It’s not easy but they should just try not to be concerned about my private life.

source www.olokunbolablessing.blogspot.com

For the first time, Lekan Abiola, one of the sons of late Chief MKO Abiola, the acclaimed winner of the free and fair June 12, 1993, revealed certain facts that his dad told him about the election, the dirty politics in Nigeria and what he told him the last day they met in his detention cell before his death.

The interview is indeed an interesting read. Except:
What do you think about the annulment of the outcome of the 1993 presidential election which your father was believed to have won?Of course, I was very disappointed and I felt a sense of betrayal because IBB was someone we knew very well. This was somebody who assured the nation that he was leaving, how can he do that? If all along, he knew that he had no intention to leave, why did he allow my dad to go all the way, do all the campaigns and spend all that he spent? He could have told my father. But as a family, we have forgiven him; we have taken it as act of God.

Have you had an opportunity to speak with IBB since then and what transpired?
Yes, I met him (IBB) about three years ago and we discussed. But he could not explain much but that he himself regretted what happened and that the whole situation was out of his hands. He said that his hands were tied and that there were many things that he could not discuss. He said we should let bygones be bygones and to bury the hatchet.

Wednesday will make it 20 years since the historic June 12 presidential election was held. Where were you when you heard about your father’s death?I was in the United States when I heard the news. We were preparing to watch a World Cup game between Brazil and Holland. I had expected my father to have been released. I was expecting a call. I went to pray and when I came back, I saw all my friends who had gathered together to watch the game but they were all looking gloomy. Instead of the television to be tuned to a football channel, I noticed that it was tuned to CNN. I put all of these together and asked ‘is my father dead’? They replied that they were just finding that out. It was really shocking because we were expecting that he would be released. Instead, what we got was the news that he was dead. And remember that my mum had died two years before, so losing both parents on the same issue hurt very much. It was painful for all of us but more painful for some of us who are Kudirat’s children, in particular, because his death meant that we had lost both our parents. So, where do you start from? It was a disaster; the worst case scenario.

Why do you consider yourself luckier than your siblings?
The last time I saw my father alive, he was in detention and there were about 10 of us – all siblings – waiting to see him. It was at the police commissioner’s office in Abuja. This was like four years before his death. We were there waiting and we had waited for like two hours. I remember thinking to myself that when daddy comes out, I would like to be the one that he would see first. Like five minutes after I thought of it, they all left, some to get drinks because we were all thirsty. Almost immediately they all left, they brought my dad out and I had my wish because I was the only one there. It was after like 10 or 15 minutes before others came back. I had an extra 10 minutes with him and you can’t buy that with N1 million. That was the last time all the 10 of us that went saw him. Before they came, my father and I chatted and joked one on one. He had a beard and I said ‘daddy, this beard fits you’. It was totally black and he had always been clean shaven; that’s why I said I was fortunate to have that extra moment with him.

The last time you saw your father, when you had about 10 extra minutes with him, what did he tell you?
He (MKO) told me to be strong and to make sure I pray a lot. He said he would never back down and that we should not be discouraged. He said he was sure that he would win back his mandate and that I should be very prayerful, hold on to God and to tell my younger ones to do the same.

How would you describe your relationship with your late father?
We had a good and wonderful relationship. He was a good father and I wasn’t a terrible son. I was lucky and fortunate to get more from him than a lot of my siblings. I looked up to him because he was a problem solver; I respected him a lot. If you had a problem, just call dad to say these are the problems. He was always there for us. I wish I can be half as good to my children as he was to me. He was a good husband to my mother and a good dad to me because you need to be both to be considered a good dad. You can’t be a good dad and be a bad husband.

How would you like him to be remembered?
Nigeria needs someone that actually cares. We didn’t need a school to be named after him or any specific thing. He did what he did to bring about change in the country, and that is the only thing that would truly make him happy. He gave his life for this country, but I have to say that the public reaction that followed the attempt to rename UNILAG (University of Lagos) after him was bad. Even if people had issues with it, there are ways to go about it; they can go to court, write letters and things like that. But the way some people went about it, blocking the road, and going on Twitter, and social media and insulting the man is just sad. Maybe Nigerians are not worth all the sacrifice because they are ungrateful. This was someone who gave up everything, including his life. I would like to commend President Goodluck Jonathan for being the first president to try to do something to remember our father. We appreciate what he tried to do; I wish to say that he should not be discouraged by the reaction from the public. Our father and mother gave their lives for this country. My mum took a bullet; what is worth doing at all is worth doing well.

How has it been for the family?
The elections cost a lost of money – billions. The struggle against Ibrahim Babangida to get back his mandate, after that, the interim government of Shonekan and then Sani Abacha cost him a lot. Government did not pay the debts owed to him for projects he had done; all the contracts he had were cancelled. They locked him up; no compensation for the family. My mother got shot in the head; her businesses too were shut down. But we thank God that he died for something honourable and just. For like 14 years, government has not done anything, they have not really apologised, and they have not done anything to compensate us. So I’m not going to hold my breath that government will still compensate the family for everything they did to us. After all, all that we have in the end is our deeds.

You lost your mother two years before you lost your dad. How did you and your dad take the loss?
I was in the US at the time; someone called to say that somebody in our family had been shot. It was the last thing any of us expected. When I was told, I remember repeating ‘daddy’, but they said it wasn’t daddy but mummy. I couldn’t imagine that it would be mummy because she was free; it was daddy who was in detention.

I came back home to see dad and to try to get back my mum’s containers that were held but we were not allowed to see him. We wanted to know what we should do but they did not allow us to see him in detention.

We met with Oladipo Diya, who was the second-in-command then. He asked us to talk to Hamza al-Mustapha, but al-Mustapha would say we should call back the next day. He just said, ‘Call back tomorrow’. Then one day, he banged the phone. So we didn’t get to see him (MKO Abiola) to know his reaction to it. It must have been very painful for him, to hear that the woman that had seven children for you was shot just like that. It was injustice on top of injustice, but I know that Allah will judge.

My younger brother, Jamiu, had told me to get our mother out. He said the government would kill her but I said that the worst they would do was to lock her up, that who would want to kill a woman? That’s to show how wicked some people can be. You shot someone in the head and did not allow the children to see their father.

When she died, it was the last thing I could ever imagine, that these people could descend so low. My mother knew Mariam Abacha; my sister and her kids were in school together. My dad also knew Abacha. Last year, I met Mariam Abacha in Mecca and some of the kids. I told her that I don’t have any animosity against her family. I told her that I expect God to forgive my father and her husband too. I know that when Abacha died, my father wrote Mariam a condolence letter. So if my dad buried the hatchet, why not me? As Muslims, we are brothers and sisters.

How do you remember him today?
I’m glad that he was a good Muslim; both my late parents actually. At the end of the day, we have nothing except our faith and our good deeds – no money, no shoes, no cars, we have nothing.

When Abiola was alive, there used to be so many visitors coming and going, but the premises are very quiet now. Why is that?He was always helping people a lot; if you have a place where the owner helps people, there will be crowds. People were always coming to come and collect something. Now, my father is no longer alive and his businesses have been crumbled. The family is no longer in a good shape to be able to continue doing that kind of thing anymore. Obviously, you will not see people coming like they used to, but some of his children are still here. Two of his wives are still living here and the mosque is still open. So maybe not as many people as before, but we still have people coming in.

Abiola had many wives and many more children. How was growing up for you?
He only had four wives as a Muslim. The ones outside were concubines and they were not inside the house. So it was just us – the four wives and their children – and we had a good relationship with one other. Out of the children belonging to the four wives, I had a good relationship with about 15 of them. The other four that I was not so close with, it was not because of animosity or anything like that. It was just because they were older than me and I didn’t get to see them often. The wives also got along fine but sometimes you know women, they sometimes don’t get along. But generally, the relationship was okay.

After Abiola’s death, many people wonder why his businesses have gone down. Why is this so?
There is no guarantee that your business will survive over time. Today, the exchange rate is so high. During Abacha’s time, it was N80 to a dollar, but now, it’s about N160. It’s very difficult to do business in Nigeria. There have been efforts to improve the rail system but the Central Bank of Nigeria should do something about the interest rate which is above 20 per cent. As it is, products made here will find it difficult to compete against those of other countries.

If countries like US and the UK where their interest rate is like two or three per cent, their economies are still shaky, so what can we say about Nigeria where the interest rate is over 20 per cent? We’ve seen improvement in electricity generation but we still need more improvement in electricity. No compensation for the family: you called an election, campaigns were held, money went into these campaigns because materials like posters were made, etc.

He now won the election, you now annulled the election and followed that up by locking him up. You closed down his businesses, you killed his wife and before that, you crippled her businesses too. No compensation till now.

Source: Punch
www.olokunbolablessing.blogspot.com

The Presidency got serious knocks on Friday as the Federal Government grounded a helicopter chartered by Edo State Governor, Adams Oshiomhole, at the Benin Airport, just 42 days after a similar fate was visited on the "hunted" Governor of Rivers State, Rotimi Amaechi.

Oshiomhole and his aides were on their way from Government House, Benin to Awka, Anambra State in the chartered OAS helicopter marked 5N-BPX AS335 for the burial of his friend's wife, Mrs. Collette Obi, when the Filipino pilot, Capt. James Manahash, received a funny signal...

The signal was from the airport’s control tower, ordering him to immediately altered course and return to the airport. He did so, disembarked and went to enquire why he was recalled.

He was told he did not pay aerodrome and landing fees and that he did not also file passengers’ manifest.

Strangely, the pilot was, however, told that he would not be allowed to fly the helicopter for reasons which were not stated to him. Not even the intervention of the governor, who was forced to disembark after sitting in the aircraft for one hour, could make the airport staff to allow the aircraft to continue with the journey.

When it became obvious he would not be allowed to fly, Oshiomhole and his aides cancelled the journey.

General Manager, Public Affairs, Nigerian Airspace Management Agency, Mr. Supo Atobatele, confirmed the incident to Punch, claiming that the pilot refused to pay because he was carrying a governor.

But, the governor’s Special Adviser (Media), Kassim Afegbua, pointed an accusing finger at the Presidency, saying they “are at it again.”

He said, “I think the government of the day is competing with too many crises. It is disturbing that governors are no longer recognised and respected in the scheme of things even when it is known that they were duly elected by the people.

“How do you explain the role of the NAMA clerk who grounded the governor’s helicopter and prevented him from keeping his appointment in Anambra because he was acting out a script that has become the rule of engagement by a dictatorial regime? We remain unprovoked because we are civilised people.”

But speaking to newsmen, the helicopter pilot said, “I was surprised that I was recalled after taking-off from Government House because I had communicated with the control tower on radio.

“We were already airborne when we got a call to return to the airport and they even threatened that failure to do so would lead to the complete grounding of the aircraft. The governor prevailed on me to return and listen to them.

“When we got back to the airport, I was told to pay landing and aerodrome fees which ordinarily we could pay later because we were already airborne. Even after completion of the process of payment within 10 minutes, we were still delayed for one hour fifteen minutes, with the governor still seated and thereafter left in anger.

“I’m surprised by this development because this is not the first time I would be coming to Benin to fly the governor. I was even threatened after payment, that the aircraft would be grounded completely if I argued with them. I have flown for 35 years, seven of which I spent in Nigeria and this is the first time I’m encountering a situation like this. I did not know what problem they have with the governor.”

How opposition reacted to the ugly issue, which they say has the imprint of the Presidency:
The CPC described the grounding of the aircraft as the antics of a “dying regime.” CPC National Publicity Secretary, Mr. Rotimi Fashakin, said “That is what you see with dying regimes. They lose focus, vision and start to bare their fangs.

“Can you imagine President Obama grounding the aircraft of an opponent just because they disagree politically? May be we are getting to a level where pedestrians will be grounded.

“I wonder if Oshiomole had declared intention to run for the office of President in 2015, because that is usually what happens when someone shows interest.”

National Publicity Secretary, ANPP, Chief Emma Eneukwu, said, “Aggression is the outward manifestation of frustration. The present federal government is frustrated and has resorted to hunting imaginary opponents. Suspending governors, grounding aircraft and issuing threats are all signs of despondency. A popular government has no business intimidating and coercing the opposition.”

sourcewww.olokunbolablessing.blogspot.com

“It always seems impossible until it is done”
– Nelson Mandela

Fellow Nigerians, please let’s not deceive ourselves, the race for the 2015 elections has started in earnest. The gladiators are virtually ready and the bullets are already flying. In our clime, elections are fought like war. And nothing is spared because a Nigerian politician believes all is fair on the battlefield. I shall endeavour to lay my permutations bare, and try to situate the strengths and weaknesses of the different groups.

Let me begin with President Goodluck Ebele Jonathan...
If the presidential election is to hold today, the gentleman will win. He will certainly get his party ticket even more readily than the last time Alhaji Atiku Abubakar attempted to wrestle with him in what turned out to be a mismatch. The reasons for Jonathan’s anticipated victory are legion. Unlike the last time, he has since settled down comfortably in power. You must remember that he has spent a total of three years as a full-time President and Commander-in-Chief of the Armed Forces of Nigeria. In those years, he’s had the rare opportunity of approving so many appointments and distributing stupendous largesse through award of contracts at home and abroad.

Those who have benefited from him would be ready to die, if necessary, to protect their privileges and not necessarily the President. Those who are shouting at the loudest voices on the rooftops are only trying to secure their relevance and slippery grip on power. They know the truth, like you and I, that on a good day and in a clean contest it is impossible for Jonathan to win again, not because he is not trying enough but because his enough seems not to be gelling with the people. That is the simple reason his acolytes are barking like dogs to see if his opponents can be intimidated. The growling will continue and progressively become the roaring of a lion. They are not going to repeat the spin of Fresh Air this time around since the evidence on ground obviously points to the contrary.

The battle-line has been drawn and the blackmail is very direct; the South-South Region says it will not accept the number two position. In cause and effect, there should be no election they seem to be telling us since they want an automatic second term for their beloved son, studiously ignoring the rest of us from the same zone. Nigerians should just accept their fate with equanimity and know they are stranded and stuck with President Jonathan for another four years beyond 2015. If the bullies succeed, they may even spring a bigger surprise by seeking a Constitutional amendment that will make it possible for a third term. We live in a country of anything and everything is possible, even though former President Obasanjo tried it but failed spectacularly.

The PDP-led Federal Government and its followers in the states still wield enormous clout and awesome power. Nigerian politicians have never been known for principle or ideology. That is seemingly an ideal and idealism for another day before the second coming of Christ. That is why it is so convenient for them to migrate like locusts forth and back. They would rather stick to Jonathan warts and all and hope to be accommodated in the next spending spree. Hope is their staple diet and their entire being hangs on him.

Moreover, Jonathan will win today because the opposition is yet to organise itself properly. I had wished we won’t allow our groups to be bogged down and distracted with the mundane issue of nomenclature. What’s in a name after-all? Our friends have dissipated too much energy and wasted so much resources on trying to register a new party and its acronym. I cautioned against this conundrum in a private chat with a very senior member of ACN. My reasoning is simple. Jonathan did not go into a merger when he entered into secret collaboration with the South West that made it possible to defeat General Mohammadu Buhari and others. Nigeria is a Mafia country and an occultist nation where things that are done in secret are always more profitable than those done in the open. The name you will give your new baby is never disclosed until the pregnancy has been safely delivered. By playing to the gallery, the opposition danced into the hands of the Dracula who wasted no time in biting them hard and sucking them dry.

I had also raised the issue of those who would prefer to reign in hell than to serve in heaven. Many of the opposition members who have refused to join the proposed APC today are paranoid about what status awaits them in the new party. A man who’s currently a Chairman in his own party may soon become a nonentity in the merger. I doubt if many Nigerians are that generous and selfless to collapse their personal ambition for the common good of all. That is the dilemma of most of the Governors and National Assembly members who are visibly opposed to Jonathan but are prevaricating on what to do next and how to jump a fast-sinking ship. Some of them think they should join the opposition while majority of the supposed renegades feel they should take over an already existing political party. It beats me hollow why we don’t ever learn from the past.

I wish to state publicly, and for any avoidance of doubt, that they will fail miserably if they start to make such a move. As things stand right now, there is only one road leading to Paradise and the other meandering to hell. There is no third road in sight. And no third party has the humongous resources to challenge the ruling party in Nigeria today. The Grumblers Party is the only workable alternative to PDP. We must force and form a semblance of a two party system even if some of us decide to remain in our individual parties. The permutation is that it should be possible for all opposition forces to queue behind a chosen presidential candidate and still be viable to contest other posts in our individual parties. That would allay the fears of those who think the bigger parties would swallow them up and reduce their chances of picking a ticket for other contests. It is a major reservation that must not be discountenanced offhandedly.

The Governors who are worried about the avuncular disposition of Buhari and Tinubu need not lose their sleep. I know both reasonably well and they don’t seem as desperate for power as many people think. I even know Tinubu better. He’s one of the brightest political strategists in Africa today. He’s enjoying the status which it has pleased God to bestow on him by working hard to grab many states from PDP. He understands the political sophistication of the South-West and will never risk demystification. His next and final achievement would be to lead his troop to defeat the Goliaths at the top as the ultimate kingmaker. That would be easier to achieve if he remains the generalissimo that he is today than being a belittling Vice Presidential candidate.

I know for a fact that, contrary to opinion in certain circles, Tinubu, The Jagaban Borgu, is the single biggest threat to PDP today while General Buhari comes next. In Nigerian politics, money is the biggest factor before ethnicity and religion. Tinubu is the one who can mobilise financial resources at different levels. His influence in Lagos alone is of incredible advantage. All the big players in the Nigerian economy are domiciled in Lagos. While they can conveniently ignore Buhari, none would risk Tinubu’s wrath. Campaign donations would flow in if the opposition presents a mega-force. If most of the 19 Governors that supported Rotimi Amaechi can join forces with their counterparts in the National Assembly, the opposition will coast home to victory. The other layer of society that the opposition must key into is the mass army of frustrated and disillusioned youths. The figures will never add up for the opposition until they ignite the political passion in the floaters that account for about 70 percent of the electorate.

Let me now examine the possible candidates for the presidential configuration. The surest bet for me remains the Speaker of the House of Representatives, Aminu Waziri Tambuwal. I narrowed my choice to him because he readily has a nationwide template and network to work with. He has shown himself as a bridge-builder while the others continue to live in the cocoon of ethnicity. The next leader of Nigeria must be someone who feels comfortable with all Nigerians. The greatest disservice to Jonathan is the desperate attempt by his supporters to turn him into a jingoist whose only qualification to govern is where he comes from.

That was one of the mistakes of June 12, when some people either deliberately or inadvertently reduced a powerful national mandate to a localised South West affair. Jonathan will soon realise like we did that his people alone cannot make him President no matter the threat of war. The same argument they are using to justify Jonathan’s compulsory second time is the same the North would marshal to say President Yar’Adua did not complete his terms and they were therefore short-changed. If I were Jonathan, I would hinge my campaign on performance rather than drums of hostilities. I will quickly bury the hatchet and settle with Amaechi and others, like President Obasanjo did with Atiku Abubakar, James Ibori and company, before he pummelled them later.

I think Tambuwal stands a better chance than the Jigawa State Governor Sule Lamido who has been publicly endorsed by President Olusegun Obasanjo. Lamido’s albatross will be that open fraternisation with Obasanjo who is no longer in control of the apparatus of power and political party unlike when he forced Alhaji Umaru Musa Yar’Adua on the nation. Obasanjo does not even command enough followership in the South West today to install a Governor. That’s not to say he is irrelevant in the scheme of things. His biggest influence is our unregistered political party, the Nigerian Armed Forces, in which he’s not just a General but one of its biggest players. Tambuwal (born January 10, 1966) fits the current trend in the world of politics and leadership. He’s charismatic and brilliant. A lawyer by training and profession, he has been exposed to international standards and best practices through courses at various institutions in Africa, United Kingdom and the United States of America.

Strategically, in order to appease the South-South, the number two position should go to them. And the best candidate to fill that spot is their ‘enfant terrible’ Governor Rotimi Amaechi (born May 27, 1965 with a Bachelor’s degree in English from the University of Port Harcourt). He’s currently the most visible political figure after the President. He’s young and confident. Furthermore, leadership across the world has become a beauty contest.

That is why the Conservatives in England found their own Prince Charming in David Cameron (born October 9, 1966), who became British Prime Minister on May 11, 2010, to counter the suavity of a Tony Blair (born May 6, 1953, and became British Prime Minister from May 2, 1997 to June 27, 2007). Now the British Labour Party is back with a finer and even younger leader, Ed Miliband (born December 24, 1969), after the drab tenure of Gordon Brown. Even the Liberal Democrats were not left behind. They found their own ‘fine boy’ in Nick Clegg (born January 7, 1967), who miraculously became Deputy Prime Minister on May 11, 2010. Most of those who voted for Barack Obama as the first Black President of America were probably hypnotised by his good looks before they were mesmerised by his brains.

If this combination fails, the opposition must challenge the supremacy of Jonathan in the South-South by attracting and presenting a young, intelligentand more charismatic personality.We need vibrant leaders to ignite the fire of the urgently needed development in Nigeria. Our nation can be transfigured into a Dubai or Hong Kong with urbane leaders in the saddle. I see no reason why the South-South Elders should mortgage and monopolise our eight years, if they so insist, to President Jonathan alone without giving others a chance.

In any event, the best package would be for the opposition to form a very formidable second force to PDP and they must do this by speedily coming up with a shadow cabinet type of arrangement comprising of a star-studded team.Until we begin to field our best materials, Nigeria is not likely to know peace or witness significant development. There is no better time and chance than now for the opposition to open a new vista for our country.

source www.olokunbolablessing.blogspot.com

 Sanusi Lamido Sanusi, Governor of Nigeria’s Central Bank , appears unable to shake off a report that he funneled Nigeria's scarce resources to Maryam Yaro, a married mistress whom he gave a job at the bank he oversees. The scandal, in which Sanusi was accused of abusing his office in order to advance an amorous relationship with a woman, broke last week.

What is going on underground about the sex scandal? Details below...
Sources told Sahara Reporters that Premium Times has been under intense pressure from associates of the CBN Governor since the expose was published.

In the wake of the report, the CBN also issued a widely circulated rebuttal claiming that Ms. Yaro was never a staff of the bank, that she was employed at Nigeria Incentive-based Risk Sharing Systems For Agricultural Lending (NIRSAL), and that the governor had no hand in her recruitment.

But records obtained by Sahara Reporters suggest that the bank’s claims are an attempt to muddle up the facts. NIRSAL, to which Ms. Yaro is attached, is a special purpose vehicle (SPV) set up by the Federal Government through a partnership between the CBN and the Federal Ministry of Agriculture. Besides, the project is domiciled in the Development Finance Department of the CBN.

It is the CBN’s human resource department that hires staff for NIRSAL, and it is Mr. Sanusi who approves all recruitments into the agency, insiders say.

Records available to us indeed showed that, contrary to CBN’s claims, Mr. Sanusi directly and personally approved Ms. Yaro’s recruitment.

Investigations by Sahara Reporters revealed that, after approving Ms. Yaro’s hiring and sending her file back to the bank’s human resource department, Mr. Sanusi sent a message to his mistress on June 25, 2012 saying, “I’m in South Africa. I approved your recruitment last week.”

Ten minutes later, Ms. Yaro responded: “You have made my day. Thank you so much. Let me know when you are back.”

When the human resource department delayed in sending her appointment letter, Ms. Yaro contacted Mr. Sanusi to complain.

“I have not heard anything from CBN since you approved my recruitment,” she wrote in a July 9, 2012 message. “Is there anything I need to do?”

A source told Sahara Reporters that, following her complaint, Sanusi contacted the CBN human resource department urging them to expedite action on her case.

Eight days later, on July 17, 2012, Ms. Yaro informed Mr. Sanusi that the human resource department had finally acted on his instruction. “Allah nguro, I have been issued my letter of offer,” she said in a message. “Thank you so much. When can I come and see you?”

When she submitted her acceptance letter to human resource, Ms. Yaro promptly informed Mr Sanusi and thanked him again for helping her to get the job.

After Ms. Yaro assumed duties at the CBN headquarters in Abuja, human resource department produced a business card for her. She was described as follows: “Dr. Maryam W. Yaro, Nirsal Project Implementation Office (NPIO), Development Finance Department, Central Bank of Nigeria.”

Even the documents released by the CBN are clear as to whether Ms. Yaro could be regarded as a staff of the CBN, and whether the governor played a role in her recruitment.

For instance, official memos detailing the processes leading to her recruitment are marked “internal,” originating from NIRSAL to other units of the bank. Her appointment letter, written on CBN letterhead, was signed by Chizoba Mojekwu, director, human resources department of the bank.

The CBN’s so-called rebuttal did not say why its human resource director would sign an appointment letter for a staff or consultant of another agency independent of the bank.

In its rebuttal, the bank provided evidence of communications leading to Ms. Yaro’s employment in 2012, but provided none relating to any public announcement of the vacancy she filled. The law requires that such a post must be publicly announced to enable interested candidates to apply.

The details show that the bank treated Ms. Yaro’s employment expressly, with memos between NIRSAL office and CBN’s top management indicating how Mr. Sanusi endorsed her recruitment.

In one document seen by Sahara Reporters, a helpless staff of the bank raised concern about Ms. Yaro’s recruitment. In a memo requesting Mr. Sanusi’s approval of the recruitment, the concerned staff minuted: “Please approve as prayed above. [But] We should take into account diversity in future recruitment.”

In approving the recruitment, Mr. Sanusi dismissed the staff’s concern, and wrote: “Approved. I think gender is a good basis for diversity here and candidate is qualified.”

Ms. Yaro’s recruitment process took a matter of weeks, and she received her letter of offer in July 17, 2012 and promptly communicated same to the CBN boss while also informing him of her planned date of assumption of duties.

Some sources within the CBN suggested to Sahara Reporters that some of the documents circulated by the CBN were forged and backdated as a face-saving measure.

Sahara Reporters learned that the details of the affair between Mr. Sanusi and Ms. Yaro have stirred anger and outrage within the bank and beyond. Critics have focused on the fact that Mr. Sanusi, a public officer, traveled on jets funded by taxpayers to keep appointments with Ms. Yaro at expensive hotels. Until this scandal broke, Mr. Sanusi was highly respected even if some of his policies, like doling cash to victims of terrorist attacks in Kano, were controversial.

Premium Times has said: “We stand firmly by our story and look forward to the moment the CBN Governor will boldly look Nigerians in the face and say any of the things we reported did not happen.
source www.olokunbolablessing.blogspot.com

Folk songstress, Lillian Engel (aka Lamili) tells Ademola Olonilua of the Punch about her 'wild' life, her music and why some call her "Prostitute". Read the chat below...
My stage name
The actual spelling is Lhame-li and it means Lord has appointed me, Lillian. Due to difficulty in pronouncing it, I decided to shorten it to Lamili. It is simpler to pronounce.

My kind of music
My music is for the young and the old. I’m a very versatile singer. I do folk songs, techno sometimes and RnB too. I am a versatile singer, I fit in everywhere.

Acceptance level
I started professionally in 2002. I was in a band then, going all over Nigeria for gigs. I started recording in 2007, that was when I recorded my single, a folk song. I released my first album in 2008 and since then, we have been working, going for shows, doing more songs.

How music began for me
I grew up in a family where everybody does music. My mother was in a choir although she did not go professional with it. My father – in his local group – is a konga drummer. My aunty is a gospel singer. We are all music lovers; I grew up listening to lots of songs. I just had it in it.

Why I decided to go professional
I always knew I was going to be a star, an artiste. I was just waiting for the right moment. When I was still a teenager, I remember wanting to go and sing. I used to sing in the choir. I went into it after the death of my mother, she died of Bosom  cancer.

Stage fright
I have the passion for music, when I was a teenager, I used to wear my sister’s mini clothes and stand in front of the mirror. The first time I was on stage, I was shaking. That was in 2002. I went on stage and I remember singing Celine Dion’s My heart will go on. I did it so well, but being my first time in front of a massive crowd all looking at a smallish girl on stage, I was so shy. I was shaking but I managed. With time I got used to it, I got over it. Whenever I think of that day now, it is funny.

About my mother
My mother and I were very close. I lost her to Bosom  cancer when I was ten. I was devastated. I am the first born of my family. In Igboland, everyone looks up to you as a mum. I felt very empty because I am not as close to my dad the way I am close to my mother. It was as if my world came to an end but somehow I survived.

Challenges faced building my career
Initially, there was no support. I was the only one doing it. It was hard to get a record label, sponsors, and it was more difficult because I am a female artiste. I got kicked out of places a lot. When I started, I was the one going to bands, asking them to give me a chance and listen to me. I remember most of the people I met told me off and called me a prostitute. They told me to get out as the place was not for a ‘little prostitute’ like me. They did not want to listen. I’m a very stubborn person, so I persisted. I had a chance to perform, that was when I had the stage fright. I met people on the street and asked them to beg on my behalf so that I would be given a chance to perform. It was hard, but my challenge now is breaking out of Port Harcourt.

My plans to break into the Lagos market
I took a little break to have my son, who is now six months old. As I came back from maternity leave, I released a single, Bend down. While in Lagos, I’ll be on a promo tour; we’ll move to South Africa soon for the video. I’m already doing it.

My petite stature
Before, it used to be a disadvantage but not anymore. I started singing when I was 16. They told me that music is not for smallish people like me, I was a teenager then, so small and innocent. People find it difficult to believe that I just had a baby, I get that a lot and when it happens, I just smile. I am happy inside because I am happily married with a lovely son and people still admire me. It is nice.

My family
Right from the beginning, even before I got married, my husband had always been supportive. We always used to plan ahead because I don’t plan to stop. Music is my life. We have always been planning towards when we’ll have a child and the career, how we are going to manage it; so it has never been a problem. Having my son is the most wonderful feeling in the world. I feel very fulfilled and I am grateful to God. I am very happy with the way things are with me. I believe I’ll cope with my work and family because my husband is very supportive. My husband believes in me and in my dream. He supports me fully.

My early days
I grew up partly in Onitsha and in Ghana. When my mum died, my uncle took us to Ghana to continue our education. I grew up partly in Onitsha. I was very shy growing up, in school, in church, I was not a loud person and I loved music. I was always singing everywhere. Sometimes people ask me if I am not going crazy.

Growing up was really good and comfortable till I lost my mother. It devastated my father too. It kind of destroyed the family because we separated. We went to Ghana and my dad was in Nigeria. I’d say growing up was good till I lost my mother. My mother was the one keeping the home together. My dad was always working and travelling. I used to look up to my mother as my everything. I confided in her. When she died, she dragged everything down with her.

sourcewww.olokunbolablessing.blogspot.com