"Stop Trying To Make A Marriage Work With A Gay Man" – Bisi Alimi Advice Nigerian Women

“Stop press!
Dear women, I have said t before and I will say it again if the man you are with loves men, pack your bag and move on. There is nothing you can do to stop a man who loves men from loving men. Staying around will make you sad and make your life hell.
This is a special message to Nigerian women, stop trying to make a marriage work with a gay man, no matter what he promised you, he will always go looking for the companionship of a man, and that’s the reality. Same goes for men who are married to women who love women.”

“You either speak up against the atrocities or keep being the victim,”

The weeks before my wedding were filled with all sorts of skin treatments, consumption of aphrodisiacs and honeypotl steaming all in anticipation of the big night. I looked forward to consummating our love on that special night.

On that special night, when all the glitz and glam of the wedding was done, it was just the two of us. I was so nervous and excited but Hamisu did not look interested. We talked for a while and then he fell asleep.Yes! My husband fell asleep on our first night. I did not know what do, whether to wake him up or to allow him sleep. I couldn’t hold myself I had to wake him up.

‘Honey, I don’t think we should be sleeping tonight. It is our first night, it is the Sunnah.. He cut me off with a kiss and we made out for a while; then he told me he couldn’t do anything that night because he was so tired from the activities of the wedding. Fair enough… so we slept off.

Two weeks later we were still sleeping together…that is we were only sleeping. At thi,s point I became fed up. No matter how hard I tried to get him in the mood my husband did not seem interested in making me a woman. He would rather go to sleep.

Three months after my wedding and I was still a virgin. My husband was not interested in that part of our marriage though he was a wonderful husband in other areas. He was very supportive of my career, he took care of me, he cooked and cleaned up after himself, he made me laugh, he was affectionate but that was the end of it… after a while I gave up trying.