I LOVE HER BUT I CAN'T MARRY HER (Page 10)

tell ram

Posted: at 10-07-2011 01:51 AM (12 years ago) | Hero

 

Posted: at 10-07-2011 07:34 AM (12 years ago) | Grande Master

While it is easy to answer that question straight up. it will be wrong to ignore the underlying cause of your probles. Despite the fact that the internet has been around for a long time, this reply is one of the few reply(less than half a dozen) i have ever responded to. Dnt try to guess why, except i felt your pain strongly.
Now i will make some few assumptions here which only you could determine and conclude if it's the truth. while you have disclosed that she disrespects you in the absence others, her attitude in the mist of other is highly indicative of her dissatisfaction of persumed ideals of a relationship(this means what she wants in her head) . i bet she those other things as well like hit you, refuse to sleep with you except when she wants to, cook, doesn't listen to you, get angery easily, kiss you, hug you, even cuddle when going to bed at night etc. if this things takes place. well, be warned there is little you can do, as  one of the post stated earlier, her proposal for marriage is a way of securing whatever good thought she has of you, e.g financial security, your declaration of your undying love, your looks, if she found you extremely physically attractive from the off., anything that she liked of you. but it is buy no means sufficient to base a marriage on. if you. i can go on and on, but i dont want to bore you. i will try and offer yo some guide line if you are in agreement with 50% of my points here.

Remember.despite your love for a women, if she is not happy, and you are not capable of making her happy, you must walk away( and i wont tell you why)

you know. i have had this phase that timing is very inportant when dealing with complex issue, but i tell you this there is no better time to do anything especially when dealing with an agry lover.

this is what you do.

Make an arrangement with her to meet on a day and time of choosing. dont tell her what you want to talk about.
on the day of the meeting seat her down, close the door get a drink of your choosing.

Tell her that you know as of late things hasn't be great, and you but are not perfect. but only by knowing will (you and her) if she want are able to work things out. Point out that you are to to have a discussion as an adult and ther will be no urguement or abuse or hitting and fighting. and that you both can say whatever is on your mind. ask her if she is ok with this before proceeding. if she is not then, there is noting more to say to each other, because a woman you cannot reason with is not worthy your time.. if she said ok. Question one. Ask her why she not happy with you? and dnt say a thing. let her do the talking , if she struggle to say a word, point out that you have notice that is nice when your friends are around and cold to you when they aren't. then let her talk. take it from there in a slow pace depending on how the conversation went. you are likely to learn 3 thing. she probably just hate how thing has turn out in her life ( in order word she has leaved out her life imaginarily and she is not happy with the distinct difference from the real world) thats why she envy your friend as she likes certain aspect of what and how they leave their life., or she does not love you, but choose to settle for you, or that you r the problem something you will have to acknowledge for example, you do things certain ways of which she do not like e.g you dont help her out around the house, take her out, passionate with her,  dont brush your teeth regularly.  you must accept your fault, and once known only you can decide to fix it or not to fix it. Just remember, always remember, just because in your last 10 relationship all your girlfriend cooks for you don't expect the 11th one to cook for you, one persons passion is another persons dislike in every aspect of life. the less expection you have, the less the disappointment you will have to face.  if you dont expect a present on your birthday, if know buys you a present, u have know reason to be disappointted, even yours girlfriend.....have to stop now go luck. update me on how it went... if you can.....

Posted: at 10-07-2011 08:32 PM (12 years ago) | Newbie

unbelievable, what is this??

Posted: at 11-07-2011 01:17 AM (12 years ago) | Hero

am out

Posted: at 11-07-2011 01:49 AM (12 years ago) | Hero

advicer

Posted: at 11-07-2011 08:49 AM (12 years ago) | Grande Master

bring it out

Posted: at 11-07-2011 09:27 AM (12 years ago) | Grande Master

i don,t have any

Posted: at 11-07-2011 02:56 PM (12 years ago) | Grande Master

Oh boy eeeeeeeee,what essss do u want?instead of u 2 appreciate GOD 4 what he gave u,u're there complaining.better don't make a mistake becos if u leave her d nest ll be BAD.

Posted: at 12-07-2011 10:38 AM (12 years ago) | Newbie

 

Posted: at 13-07-2011 11:46 PM (12 years ago) | Grande Master