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2041
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Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / Forgetful Friends |
on: 8-05-2011 11:40 PM
| | Three friends (Diane, Wikisoot and Udo), ages 92, 94, and 96, live together. One night the 96-year-0ld Diane, draws a bath. She puts one foot in and pauses. "Was I getting in the tub or out?" she yells.
The 94-year-old Wikisoot, hollers back, "I don't know, I'll come up to see." She starts up the stairs and stops. She shouts, "Was I going up or going down?"
The 92-year-old Udo, is sitting at the kitchen table having tea, listening to her friends. She shakes her head and says, "I sure hope I never get that forgetful", and she knocks on a cutting wood with her vegetable knife. Then she yells, "I'll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who's at the door." | | | | |
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Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / Why? |
on: 8-05-2011 11:06 PM
| | Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, "why is the bride dressed in white?"
"Because white is the color of happiness," her mother explained. "And today is the happiest day in her life."
The child thought about this for a moment. "So why is the groom wearing black?" | | | | |
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Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / Why? |
on: 8-05-2011 11:05 PM
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Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, "why is the bride dressed in white?"
"Because white is the color of happiness," her mother explained. "And today is the happiest day in her life."
The child thought about this for a moment. "So why is the groom wearing black?"[/size]
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2046
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Forum / Relationships & Romance / Re: Ladies, what do you think is your first impression on a guy? |
on: 8-05-2011 08:44 PM
| | Hmm..I know for sure that it's a psychological fact that when human beings meet each other for the first time, the very first impressions are physical attributes; tall, short, handsome, etc.. From then on, it depends on the individual. As for me, the next impression I get depends on the attitude the guy gives me. If he gives off a nasty or self-centered attitude, I will then get the impression that that is the way he is always.
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Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / Re: Only in America.. |
on: 7-05-2011 07:40 PM
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Thanks for the laughs, Maryclaret. Funny how people behave.
True, the American culture is different but not necessarily better.
dan fulani
Agreed! See some crazy things going on  | | | | |
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Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / 10 Commandments of Marriage |
on: 7-05-2011 04:18 AM
| | Commandment 1.
Marriages are made in heaven. But so again, are thunder and lightning.
Commandment 2.
If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
Commandment 3.
Marriage is grand -- and divorce is at least 100 grand!
Commandment 4.
Married life is very frustrating. In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens. In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens. In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.
Commandment 5.
When a man opens the door of his car for his wife, you can be sure of one thing: Either the car is new or the wife is.
Commandment 6.
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one; the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.
Commandment 7.
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you said. After marriage, he will fall asleep before you finish talking. | | | | |
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Forum / FunnyHub (Jokes + Comedy) / After the Wedding |
on: 7-05-2011 04:09 AM
| | A young couple got married and left on their honeymoon. When they got back, the bride immediately called her mother.
"Well," said her mother, "so - how was the honeymoon?"
"Oh, mama," she replied, "the honeymoon was wonderful! So romantic..."
Suddenly she burst out crying. "But, mama, as soon as we returned Sam started using the most horrible language - things I'd never heard before! I mean, all these awful 4-letter words! You've got to come get me and take me home... PLEASE MAMA!"
"Sarah, Sarah," her mother said, "calm down! Tell me, what could be so awful? WHAT 4-letter words?"
"Please don't make me tell you, mama," wept the daughter, "I'm so embarrassed - they're just too awful! COME GET ME, PLEASE !!!"
"Darling, baby, you must tell me what has you so upset... Tell your mother these horrible 4-letter words!"
Still sobbing, the bride said, "Oh, mama...words like: Dust, Wash, Iron, Cook..." | | | | |
