Top 5 big lies about marriage

Marriage is often seen as fix-all – dreamy singles think it will make them happy, restless men and women think it will make them feel complete. We take apart the five most popular cons that mar marriage.

I won’t be lonely

Being lonely or having company has nothing to do with getting married. Many loners remain so even after marriage. A long-suffering woman shared her woes, she said that though she was married, she was always lonely. “I never felt that we shared anything. When I spoke, he heard but never listened. On holidays, I never felt that we were together.” Those who are lonely and feel that marriage will be a solution, need to analyse and identify what they are feeling.

Anytime sex

segxwal desire and frequency is dependent on libido, compatibility and the acceptance of the word ‘sex’ among both partners. Many partners, who have a deep-seated resentment for each other and are constantly bickering, are not having enough sex. Maybe one of them thought that marriage would satisfy their segxwal desires, but that didn’t happen, and so, the blame-game continues in other spheres of life.

I won’t work

This is quite an unrealistic thought, as increasingly, more couples realise that marriage does not mean financial security. Especially women realise that the lifestyle and aspirations one has calls for both spouses to generate income. Financial security is rare if you are not taking care of it yourself; there is no escape route. And if you have not discussed this with your partner, he or she may feel resentful of being considered a meal ticket.

Big happy family

Most of us are conditioned to win over the love and affection of the in-laws. We bend over backwards, expect to be loved immediately and are baffled when the feeling is not reciprocated. The biological imperative of birthing gives rise to a lot of unconditional love and acceptance which is hormonally absent in in-laws. So it is advised to give respect, love and attention, but don’t expect much.

Kids can fix it all

Couples feel that unhappiness in a marriage will be sorted by parenthood. This is another misconception because if there is incompatibility, a child would actually come into an unwelcoming environment and may even be resented. Parenthood should be a well-thought out decision considering aspects such as – Are we ready? Do both of us want children? Do we have all the help we need? Do we agree on core values?

Posted: at 17-05-2012 11:41 PM (12 years ago) | Upcoming

Marriage it's a big lie itself!

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Posted: at 18-05-2012 08:41 AM (12 years ago) | Hero

Two people come together to deceive themselves in the name of marriage. Pure pretence.

Posted: at 18-05-2012 08:56 AM (12 years ago) | Hero

marriage is a big institution it d only institution u get certificate bfor u enter in2 it............. obtain ur nd hnd bsc msc phd nd death

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Posted: at 18-05-2012 10:04 AM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac

U re very correct.

Posted: at 18-05-2012 10:13 AM (12 years ago) | Hero

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Posted: at 18-05-2012 10:19 AM (12 years ago) | Addicted Hero

seconded

Posted: at 18-05-2012 10:23 AM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac

MARRIAGES IS A MISERIES

Posted: at 18-05-2012 10:26 AM (12 years ago) | Upcoming

U didnt add these two, 1) we r in luv n dats all dat matas.since we luv each oda evri oda problem is solved. HELL NO! Rlatnshp is fantasy,marriage is al abt reality.love isnt jst enof.its one tin 2 claim 2 luv,its anoda 2 practise it.wen u enta d marriage,u go 4get luv. 2)  we r a perfect match bcos we neva disagree. U neva disagree probably bcos uve carefuly managed 2 avoid issues dat cause arguements.bt i tel u,u wont be able 2 do dat wen u eventualy marry. Young pple esp ladies fantasize a lot.its high tym we all woke up n smell d coffee. Marriage is work work work. If ure nt ready 2 wrk,pls dnt get married.

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Posted: at 18-05-2012 10:37 AM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac

marring someone cause of their money,because the lady got too old and want to belong,because a lady just want to be known as a Mrs so and so,because a lady got pregnant during the relationship and to pprevent scandal she quickly marries the dude.should i keep going

Posted: at 18-05-2012 10:43 AM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac