#15 Make Yourself an Alibi
Provided you don’t keep regular meetings with your lover, you should always think of a good reason to lie to your official partner. Something which is truthful, realistic, and fits in the norms of your everyday life. Don’t say something like I need to go fix a friend’s computer or my boss just got hit by a car. Not gonna work.
#14 Travel Far Far Away
If your desire to cheat suddenly erupts in you and you can’t handle it, the safest thing to do for an immediate meeting will be for you two to go somewhere away from the city, where there will be no possible chance to get caught. Since those are merely occasional, you need to sound occasional. Missed buss, driver heart attack or something more believable.
#13 Don’t be Brave Enough To Bring The Lover Home
This is far too risky. She or he may forget something, she/he may leave a smell of some sort, a mark, anything which will spark off jealousy in a suspicious wife faster than she/ he can say “Get out of my House!” Well, provided it is her/his house.
#12 Don’t Be Stupid Enough To Go To The Other Lover’s Home
The opposite action is just as ridiculously inappropriate since you can just as easily get caught by your lover’s real partner. And be absolutely sure-if he or she finds out, your wife/ husband, boyfriend/ girlfriend will find out as well. They don’t make sure this happens just because to help your partner, they do it to make you pay. The Dark Side of the Force…
#11 Remember! DON’T call from your home number!
A particularly stupid thing to do is to call your lover from your phone number. There is about ten billion million zillion reasons to get caught this way-if your partner pays the bills for your phone and sees the calls, if you have a messenger, if she is on another phone in the house and overhears your conversation…The most frequent mistakes are the most obvious ones.
#10 Remember! DON’T give your home number!
This is probably one of the most foolishly stupid mistakes to do. It is so easy to get caught that you will perform a direct face-palm when you see your actual partner’s pissed off face while she/he is holding the phone on speaker and makes you listen your lover’s seducing words.
#9 Avoid Obvious Places
You will be very surprised to learn how many gazes a passionately kissing couple would attract and how many people you get in contact every day. It is obvious-do not got with your lover to obvious places-go to tiny corners, or to restaurant bathrooms, or to Mall closed phone cabins, just try to avoid people and rumors.
#8 The Gym Trick
The first and quickest hint to your real partner that you are cheating is the smell of your clothes. Now, to make sure that you have removed any smelly evidence, buy a gym card and spray or change (worse option) your clothes so that they do not give away anything. It takes a lot of work but that is the path of the Unrighteous Ones.
#7 Nickname Disguise
Now, more or less, it is almost impossible to avoid visible contact with your lover in front of others. So act, disguise your actual intentions for one another. Make appropriate nicknames-like she/he can call you Fatty, you can call him/her Stinky. Okay, maybe something more believable but let others know, especially your real partner that you are not on good terms.
#6 Do Not Use Facebook
We will repeat that twice. Do not use Facebook. Do not use Facebook. Nowadays, any sort of comment, like, post, messages, with the existence of total lack of privacy is a credible danger for the ruining of the secret.
#5 Evidence: Eliminate
A perfect cheater leaves no evidence: like a perfect criminal. Ow, yeah, you got how there is no need for “like” huh? Well, you need to take care of every possible little hint that can spark off in your beloved official partner jealousy in terms of time, appearance and behavior. Take off all doubts and the affair might be over without he or she ever learns. Thumbs up!
#4 Match Cheating With Expectation
It may sound a little bit out of place but good cheating requires a lot of discipline. Yes. my dear fellows, you need to be completely devoted to cheating on your partner, to dedicate your entire being on accurately altering your daily life so that cheating can occur without suspicion. A good cheater is a faithful and accurate cheater! For instance: Tell your lover-”I want to meet you in Thursday and Friday night” because it is then that your actual partner believes you to be working up to late.
#3 Throw Away Trust
Yes, it may be difficult to bear, but this is the price every cheater needs to pay and frankly spoken the less people know the more safe you will be. If you can hold out, tell no one. Anyway, if you have cheated on your actual partner, you are supposed to be saying bye bye to trust in general already.
#2 Never Promise to Your Lover Something That You Can’t Give
“Let’s go to the Hawaii, we’ll buy a house there!” or “Let’s make lots and lots of cheating babies!” or “I promise I will kill him/her, just give me some time!” NO! You need to follow strict regulations without overestimating yourselves. If you feel prepared to play hero cheater well, good luck with the getting caught part.
#1 Forget Overconfidence
Never allow yourself to believe that you owe complete control over the situation. Remember-you are doing something wrong and luck is unlikely to be on your side. If you want to cheat on your partner the right way, you must not satisfy yourself with the necessities-you need to also be prepared for the unexpected surprises. Do it properly, people!
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