I can’t marry a man whose mother is still alive
The Yoruba have a saying: it is not every wet fabric that can be dried in the sun. Fine, you have heard all kinds of stories about mean mothers-in-law, but must you say it to your guy’s face? Has it occurred to you that most women who praise their mothers-in-law to high heavens are really secretly planning how to kill them? Must you express everything going on in your mind? Anyways, now that your guy knows that you prefer motherless men, you can bet your last kobo that the relationship is dead. Yes, dead as a dodo. Right now, he sees you as a mother-killer. Until you make your final exit from his life, his eyes are on your bag which he thinks are filled with everything from arsenic to otapiapia to dispatch his mother to her ancestors.
I prefer ribbed condom to smooth ones
Geez, you are not supposed to know the difference between one condom and the other. Your knowledge of condoms and their flavours is not for public consumption. What am I going to do with you? Blurting out such stuff is as bad as offering a man a condom the first time you allow him into your bed.
You are so much better than the other jerks in my past
I guess you think that is one big compliment that would make him grow a few inches taller but when a guy hears a line like that, his alarms go off. Why? Because you sound like a girl with a past as long as from Lagos to Zaria. What’s worse, you sound like all your past affairs have been awful. That’s not all. He’ll also assume that since you think all the men you have dated till date are jerks, he’d be joining the league of former jerks one day. In case nobody ever told you that men don’t like to be reminded of a girl’s exes, especially if they were jerks, now you know. If you must complement him, say something like ‘I’ve never met anyone like you’ or ‘ you make me feel so special.’ Otherwise, keep your past where it belongs, in your far away past and out of sight.
I met this great guy and I think you two should get together, even become friends
Girlfriend, match making does not suit you and choosing your guy’s friends is so totally against the rules of good affairs. Sure, your intentions may be cool but a man’s mind doesn’t work like a woman’s. As soon as he hears that line, the green-eyed monster kicks in. His first thought is ‘are you in to this new guy and you are trying to cover it up?’ It’s like you are the one who really wants to befriend the guy. He can choose his own friends, so don’t bother directing his social network. Don’t indict yourself or make him suspicious of your business relationships by pushing your successful business partners in his face.
Can you really afford that?
Maybe he just bought the latest HD flat screen television set, a couple of other cutting-edge electronics and a pricey jewelry set for you, it is not your place to tell him he’s a spendthrift. No, not if you are married. You are not his mother and unless you want him to start treating you like his mum, don’t act like her. If you nag him about his money-handling abilities (or lack of them), he’ll flip his lid and you’ll nag, then he’d flip some more and you’d nag some more. And where would that leave you? Out of a relationship with a guy who wants to spoil you with gifts. Dearie, let him, please.
If you are married to him, it is another ball game for another day but if you are just dating, what he does with his money is none of your business.
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