When His Problems Shouldn't Be Yours? How true is this?

Naijapal Divas, Is this really true?

When you care about someone, you want to take on their life, and that includes their problems. And while you should absolutely be a source of support and even of good advice for your partner, there are some areas of his life that is neither your business nor your problem.

Fights with his family
If your guy is in a fight with his family, don’t make it your mission to fix it. Don’t nudge him to patch things up, and give him apology scripts to read on the phone with him. So long as he is still treating you well, be happy for that and let him work things out. On top of that, if the stress of his fight with his family is making him lash out at you, don’t take that. Don’t walk on eggshells or just take verbal abuse. Tell him to figure it out with his family, and not bring that tension home to you.

Trouble at work
If he is struggling to discover a way to get a promotion, or get a special project, if you continuously pitch him ways to get what he wants at work, he will start to feel that you see him as a failure or lacking ambition. If he asks for your advice on how you would handle it, give it. But don’t check up too much on his progress. He’ll tell you if he wants to.

Emotional baggage
Did his ex leave a few emotional scars? Maybe paranoia over cheating? Or, being ultra sensitive to anyone seeming controlling? Emotional baggage possibilities are endless, but if your guy is aware that he has it, he needs to keep it on lockdown. He can’t irrationally blow up at you and say, “Sorry, just triggered something from my past relationship.” He needs to learn to handle those irrational emotions. You shouldn’t be taking the brunt for damage you didn’t’ do.

Fights with his friends
Similar to fights with the family, don’t push him to resolve things with his friends. He will feel like you think he can’t handle his personal relationships. Also, men just settle things differently than women do.

How he treated exes
We’ve all done things in relationships we’re not proud of. But, we learn. Your boyfriend may have treated his exes in a way that makes you cringe to hear about, but if you have no problem with the way he treats you, you can’t really freak out about the update on his history. He has obviously learned his lesson.

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Posted: at 9-03-2012 12:24 PM (13 years ago) | Addicted Hero

 

Posted: at 9-03-2012 04:28 PM (13 years ago) | Gistmaniac

Am  swity.....wht abt u 

Posted: at 10-03-2012 09:09 AM (13 years ago) | Addicted Hero

Doin great   

Posted: at 10-03-2012 07:38 PM (13 years ago) | Addicted Hero

lol thx...how was ur weekend? 

Posted: at 12-03-2012 09:57 AM (13 years ago) | Addicted Hero

Gud!

Posted: at 12-03-2012 10:33 AM (13 years ago) | Addicted Hero

How i dress nah   

Posted: at 12-03-2012 10:51 AM (13 years ago) | Addicted Hero

interestin...cent

Posted: at 12-03-2012 06:01 PM (13 years ago) | Hero

There is no way a man can have his full freedom with a controlled woman, or a lady who claim to know it all. Our job is to help them out when they are going thru some difficulties. For example, tell him that he look so sexy/sweet whenever he is upset or under stress. But don't try to take over his fight.

Nice one 50bonnies

Posted: at 13-03-2012 12:50 AM (13 years ago) | Hero

huh oyinbo, im not jor 

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Posted: at 13-03-2012 06:30 PM (13 years ago) | Addicted Hero