man the guy fugly self! him fit do better than him!

A man walks into a drug store with his 8 year old son. They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks,

"What are these, Dad?"

To which the man matter-of -factly replies, "Those are called condoms, son.....Men use them to have safe sex."

"Oh, I see," replied the boy pensively. "Yes, I've heard of that in health class at school."

He looks over the display and picks up a package of 3 and asks, "Why are there 3 in this package?"

The Dad replies, "Those are for high school boys. One for Friday, one for Saturday and one for Sunday."

"Cool, says the boy. He notices a 6 pack and asks, "Then who are these for?"

"Those are for college men." the Dad answers, "Two for Friday, Two for Saturday and Two for Sunday."

"WOW!" exclaimed the boy, "then who uses THESE?" he asks, picking up the 12 pack.

With a sigh, the Dad replied, "Those are for married men, one for January, one for February, one for March..."

A young boy went to his father and asked, “Dad, what’s the difference between theory and reality?”

“Well, son, the best way to explain this is a practical exercise. Go ask your Mom if she’d sleep with a stranger a million dollars”

The boy returned and said, ” She said she would, Dad.” “OK,” replied the father, “Go ask your sister the same question.”

The boy returned and said that his sister also answered yes to the question and then asked his Dad, “What’s this got to do with theory and reality?”

“It’s simple, son. In theory, we live with millionaires. In reality, we live with a two sluts.”

    Bill, Jim, and Scott were at a convention together and were
    sharing a large suite on the top of a 75 story sky scraper.
    After a long day of meetings they were shocked to hear that the
    elevators in their hotel were broken and they would have to climb
    75 flights of stairs to get to their room.  Bill said to Jim and
    Scott, let's break the monotony of this unpleasant task by
    concentrating on something interesting.  I'll tell jokes for 25
    flights, and Jim can sing songs for 25 flights, and Scott can
    tell sad stories the rest of the way.  At the 26th floor Bill
    stopped telling jokes and Jim began to sing.  At the 51st floor
    Jim stopped singing and Scott began to tell sad stories.  "I will
    tell my saddest story first," he said.  "I left the room key in
    the car!"

haba, na me be the teacher!

if dem dey zuzu, dem no deserve any preferential treatment even if dem be girls! wetin concern me!

ok show me where it was posted before hussy!

hey bitch, if it's posted before, read it and phyuk off without saying a word aite?

oh boy na the question me self dey ask oh!!

wetin concern me?

Two women friends had gone out for a Girls Night Out, and had been decidedly over-enthusiastic on the beers. Incredibly drunk and walking home they suddenly realized they both needed to pee. They were very near a graveyard and one of them suggested they do their business behind a headstone or something. The first woman had nothing to wipe with so she took off her panties, used them and threw them away. Her friend however was wearing an expensive underwear set and didn't want to ruin hers, but was lucky enough to salvage a large ribbon from a wreath that was on a grave and proceeded to wipe herself with it. After finishing, they made their way home.

The next day the first woman's husband phones the other husband and said, "These damn girls nights out have got to stop. My wife came home last night without her panties." "That's nothing," said the other. "Mine came back with a sympathy card stuck between the cheeks of her butt that said, 'From all of us at the Fire Station, Well never forget you!'

A local United Way office realized that the organization had never received a donation from the town's most successful lawyer. The person in charge of contributions called him to persuade him to contribute.

"Our research shows that out of a yearly income of at least $500,000, you give not a penny to charity. Wouldn't you like to give back to the community in some way?"

The lawyer mulled this over for a moment and replied, "First, did your research also show that my mother is dying after a long illness, and has medical bills that are several times her annual income?"

Embarrassed, the United Way rep mumbled, "Um ... no."

The lawyer interrupts, "or that my brother, a disabled veteran, is blind and confined to a wheelchair?"

The stricken United Way rep began to stammer out an apology, but was interrupted again.

"or that my sister's husband died in a traffic accident," the lawyer's voice rising in indignation, "leaving her penniless with three children?!"

The humiliated United Way rep, completely beaten, said simply, "I had no idea..."

On a roll, the lawyer cut him off once again, "So if I don't give any money to them, why should I give any to you?"

mumu girl

hey stupid, you shouldn't appreciate some bunch of nobodies tryna be somebodies with a song that's opprobrious at best! you're a dick,, honeypot!

oh boy see these mumu them oh! their brains dey touch? owaa,, M.I/Henry X/ruggedy baba? 9ice where una dey... make una start to relax the disses oh... if una no release tracks dem go think say we dey carry last oh!

nna ehn na wao for D'banj and Don Jazzy oh! now them dey chop american dollarz for Kanye West hand!

LOL james bond!! kudos oga sire!

you sure say you mean the congratz? 

na wao how you carry know say she ney dey wear bra? you bin dey there or see am?

no be small thing indeed!!