d guy no understand the joke oh, na me cause am?

nah wah oh,, this kind thing make news too?! who no dey lie na?

I gas admit, our 9ja police no dey carry last ... in locating these stupid suicide bombers!

R.I.P??! wtf gurl? He's a phyuking mindless suicide bomber!!

oh so you have an ass? that's interesting... then why don't yo take your phyuking three pound hand you used to type,, turn it sideways and shove it up your ass, all up your ass!! moron!!!

oh boy wetin na 

that's why we're different hun!

that's life baby, grab it by the throat until you get what you want

mind your business!! ahh I really want to rip you into pieces with curses but you aint just worth it,,, just so you know, I'm really really indifferent to gurls as I am to guys! phyuk with me, I'll hand your ass back to you!

shut up turkey!

nahh, you just seem like the dimwitted type ok?

Think before you post a reply to something you don't understand!!

If you read it from right to left, it means if you drink coke in the desert, you'll be thirsty and exhausted.
sometimes make una try to think before una talk or reply to joke una no understand. Jokes are not necessarily easy to understand!

 

A disappointed salesman of coca cola returns from his Middle East assignment.
A friend asked, "why weren't you successful with the Arabs?"
The salesman replied "When I got posted to the middle east, I was very confident that I will make a good pitch as coca cola is virtually unknown there.
But I had a problem, I didn't know how to speak Arabic. So, I planned to convey the message through 3 posters ...
First poster, a man crawling through the hot desert sand, totally exhausted, thirsty and fainting.
Second, the man is drinking our cola and
Third, our man is now totally refreshed. Then these posters were pasted all over the place."
"That should have worked." said his friend.
The salesman replied. "well not only did I not speak Arabic, I also didn't realize that Arabs read from right to left ..."

Two guys were talking at work.

"I've got a problem," said the first one.

"What is it?"

"My wife has done it to me again. I'm supposed to buy my mother-in-law a present for her birthday, from the two of us. And, I am fresh out of ideas. I mean, it's HER mother, why can't she buy it?"

"What did you buy her last year?" the other one asked.

"Last year I bought her a VERY EXPENSIVE graveyard plot of land."

"Hmmmm, hard to top that one," said the other.

The two guys couldn't come up with anything. So the son-in-law didn't buy his mother-in-law anything for her birthday.

When the big day arrived the next weekend, she was a bit upset. At the family gathering for her birthday, she announced out loud to everyone, "Thank you all for the wonderful gifts. Too bad my daughter and son-in-law weren't so thoughtful!"

Thinking quickly, the son-in-law responded, "Well, you haven't used the gift I gave you last year!"

 

A man approached the window of a movie theater with a chicken on his shoulder and asked for two tickets.

"Who's the other ticket for?" the ticket girl asked.

"For my pet chicken." He said, pointing to the bird.

"I'm sorry," the girl tells him, "but we don't allow animals in the theater."

The man walked around the corner of the building, and stuffed the chicken into his pants. He returned to the ticket window and bought a ticket, entered the theater, and sat down.

The chicken started to get too hot, so the man, figuring it was okay because it was dark to unzipped his pants and let the chicken stick its head out.

The woman seated next to him looked down in horror. She nudged her friend Amanda and whispered, "Amanda! This man next to me just unzipped his pants!"

Amanda replied, "Oh, don't worry about it. Just ignore him. If you've seen one, you've seen them all."

The woman whispered back, "I know, I know, but this one's eating my popcorn!"