> Nothing would fit me, not even a blouse.
>
> The cookies I'd nibbled, the eggnog I'd taste
> At the holiday parties had gone to my waist.
>
> When I got on the scales there arose such a number!
> When I walked to the store (less a walk than a lumber).
>
> I'd remember the marvelous meals I'd prepared;
> The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,
>
> The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese
> And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please."
>
> As I dressed myself in my old shirt
> And prepared once again to do battle with dirt---
>
> I said to myself, as I only can
> "You can't spend a winter disguised as a man!"
>
> So--away with the last of the sour cream dip,
> Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip
>
> Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
> "Till all the additional ounces have vanished.
>
> I won't have a cookie--not even a lick.
> I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
>
> I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie,
> I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.
>
> I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore---
> But isn't that what January is for?
>
> Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.
> HAPPY NEW YEAR to all and to all a good DIET!!!
>
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