how much do you think should be the maximum amount a parent should collect as bride price, a gistmanian who is on the verge of losing a lady he loves because he can not afford her parent's demand share this:
Quote
My name is Adeyemi Phillips and I am about to lose a woman I love and hope to get married to, all because her family are not being reasonable over their demands on our wedding. I met Chinwe while we were in the university in Lagos and she is from the eastern part of the country while I am from the Yoruba speaking part of the west. We have been dating for over six years and this year, we decided to make our union formal by tying the knots. We went for our introduction and it went smoothly and I had high hopes that the traditional marriage, the one they 'Igba Nkwu' would be as smooth but when the gave me a list of things to provide, I had to sit back and have a rethink. The items they requested was so much and ridiculous that one would think they are selling their daughter. When my family and I sat down and made the calculations, it amounted to N2.2 million and that is far from the budget I have in mind. My parents have advised me to look for a Yoruba girl to marry and forget Chinwe but I love her so much and do not want to lose her. But my problem is that I cannot afford such an amount and even if I do, how will we start life as a young couple? Adeyemi, Lagos."
your advice is needed
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Posted: at 27-10-2015 11:00 AM (9 years ago) | Gistmaniac
Onebabyallen at 27-10-2015 11:48 AM (9 years ago) (m)
You may think it as if,you a yoruba is for all off us weather ibo,USA, Canada Yoruba you will spend the money mostly Mbaise lga. The best thing you will do pageant the girl after they will come and tell bring even 200 hundred thousand naira.
Posted: at 27-10-2015 11:48 AM (9 years ago) | Newbie
whoisuche at 27-10-2015 01:42 PM (9 years ago) (m)
Dear Adeyemi don't take that way. In Igbo language there is saying that says, you cant marry wife finish. you can the parents how much u budgeted and they will c how they will do it for booth of u.
Posted: at 27-10-2015 01:42 PM (9 years ago) | Newbie
Adeyemi pls don't see it cus u are yoruba. Dats how some eastern pple collect money especially if she d first daughter. Talk to d parent of d gal and if they are educated, they will reason wit u and accept whatever u have. I have seen so many yorubas marry igbo and many igbos marry yorubas. I don't kn how they did it but talk to d parent.
Posted: at 27-10-2015 02:10 PM (9 years ago) | Addicted Hero
this bride price nonsense represents old inherited believes,it has no place in our modern society....if two people love each and decides to marry,they should go ahead and marry as they so please..Its time for us to get rid of a lot of our old inherited traditional believes...its a changing world...let also change accordingly
Posted: at 27-10-2015 03:37 PM (9 years ago) | Gistmaniac
Like seriously? Hmmm, am from Enugu State. Our list is 150k including bride price which is 5k. I don't know the part of Igbo land that you are talking about and if this story is real.
Posted: at 27-10-2015 04:21 PM (9 years ago) | Gistmaniac
I see where the poster is coming from. He is right about Mbaise people, their marriage is expensive more than other parts of Igbo. However, if the woman loves u and u love her, Mbaise or any other part of Igbo would not hold u hostage till u are prepared to do those things. Just pay the bride price, make a promise, take your wife and waka, comeback when u can. Keep your relationship with them very cordial and don't abuse their daughter. They are only asking u for so much because there is a belief that u may not show up or be of any help after taking your wife. Go ahead and spoil your father and mother in-laws, and their children; I bet u, they will not worry u about doing anything till u are ready. One thing u will be sure of is that Mbaise women are very hard working and productive; good help and support for their husbands.
Posted: at 27-10-2015 04:37 PM (9 years ago) | Gistmaniac
jossy4reall at 27-10-2015 10:48 PM (9 years ago) (m)
something wey u suppose discuss with ur wife to be and find solution,,u carry am go internet.....if u no get moni and the parents no fit reduce moni for u den u take ur love back and leave dia daughter for dem,,after all dia is still part of Igbo wia u can marry a woman with 30kobo and u have to provide the exact change.... any other thing wey u dey give the family is ur choice.....sometimes other parts of Nigeria dey talk am like say to marry woman from all Igbo land u go spend millions as if na for dia land,,dem go dash Igbo man wife for free of charge.... I believe say person wey put dis thing for internet no wan marry any Igbo girl.....na wetin he or she hear other people dey talk,, e come carry am put for internet
Love or Hate me its ur Biz, I have more important things to think abt since u never gonna change me
Posted: at 27-10-2015 10:48 PM (9 years ago) | Hero
dickieponga at 28-10-2015 12:07 AM (9 years ago) (m)
Abeg give am belle, wen u give am belle demsef go cut d price to just 15k and na dat time u sef go talk say u no wan marry am again... Trust me on dis u can't go wrong...How much go remain to rent or buy house....? In dis modern world dem dey demand, me i no care if she be 1st daughter wey get degree, dis is modern day slavery.. Dis same woman go tire u wen una start to live together na dat time u go no her true colours... Na love wan tintin una dey do...Anoda solution is both of u save una money by running away...To hell wit tradition..
Posted: at 28-10-2015 12:07 AM (9 years ago) | Hero
dickieponga at 28-10-2015 12:10 AM (9 years ago) (m)
Quote from: chylind5 on 27-10-2015 04:21 PM
Like seriously? Hmmm, am from Enugu State. Our list is 150k including bride price which is 5k. I don't know the part of Igbo land that you are talking about and if this story is real.
So u go charge me 155k, na me we dey talk about o.. U go dey lucky if dem see 10k... Make we siddon negotiate about d 10k sef cos na 5k i get rite now...
Posted: at 28-10-2015 12:10 AM (9 years ago) | Hero
I feel say the parents of the girl no too like you,talk to ur girl make she follow the parents yarn say things no too gallant for ur side,abi u self go play high profile for them nah him make dem bill u anyhow?
Posted: at 28-10-2015 07:08 PM (9 years ago) | Hero