When cheating you must create a line between “partner A†and “partner Bâ€. This means never allowing the person you are messing around with to permeate your life completely. You should never allow this person into your home or even near your residence. If possible keep as much personal information, well, personal. Remember that you don’t really know “person B†and if and when you decide to stop communicating with them they may try to retaliate. If you don’t believe me, just watch Court TV sometime! So avoid all super personal details like where your partner works, your address, etc. In addition, you will need to “cover your tracks†at home. Here’s the best ways to do this:
1. Drop the Tried Excuses. The first red flag that someone is a cheater is when they continually use the same tired excuse for why they are going to be gone. The most common excuse is work – weather it’s working late or going in on days off. The bottom line is that people who are suspicious have ways of finding you and work is one of the easiest of them.
2. Keep Your Partner Happy – If you don’t want your partner to grow suspicious of your activity it’s imperative that you keep them happy. Get them flowers or write them a little note every now and again. Let them know that you care and they will be much less suspicious.
3. Avoid Phone Contact. Be sure that your new partner knows not to contact you on your home phone or cellular phone. Even text messages can be very risky. Instead communicate through a site like myspace or create a free email account with Yahoo or Hotmail.
4. Never Pay By Credit. A HUGE mistake is paying for anything by credit card or debit card. Not only can you forget to dispose of the receipt but if your partner gets a hold of your bank statement it will be near impossible to explain why you went out to dinner at a romantic restaurant “alone†or why you filled up your gas tank so far from home or work. So keep cash on hand.
5. Keep Expenses Under Control. A single relationship can be expensive enough, let alone trying to juggle two of them. Don’t fall into the trap of blowing money you don’t have on your “other†partner. It’s a lost cause and will catch up to you in the end. I have heard so many sob stories about people who have made the mistake of getting themselves thousands of dollars in debt by trying to impress another individual. So if you plan to step out on your partner, do it with realistic financial expectations.
6. Watch Yourself. Are you making up lie after lie? Do you have to fabricate huge stories to cover up for other huge stories? Even if you think you are dating a total idiot, you are not. People are eventually going to see through all of your lies and you will have no way of ever being trusted again. So instead of making up lies try and be truthful. Say only what you really did do and leave out the details. For example, if you did go to the grocery store, tell your partner that. Leave out the fact that you stopped by the coffee house and had a hot chocolate with “the other womanâ€. This way you are not creating lies. Basically, follow the “don’t ask don’t tell†policy.
7. Don’t Use Friends. Never try and have your friends cover for you. In fact, don’t even tell your friends about your affair. Friends can accidentally or on-purpose spill the beans about your activity. Keep your business to yourself and you won’t have to worry about getting told on.
8. Keep Your Distance – Don’t cheat with a neighbor, one of his coworkers, a relative or anybody that is in any way connected to your partner.
Finally, the best rule of advice is not to cheat. No matter how hard you try to do it you will have to live with knowing that you have been unfaithful. And, like the saying says, “All good things must come to an endâ€. Is it worth losing your husband or wife? Children? House? If you answered “yes†to those questions then why not just make the decision to leave those things?
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