Please i need help seriously, am 28 yrs old guy dating a 26 yrs old Igbo girl, we love ourselves very well & we are planning of settling down 2gada & to be frank with you guys-i have never love a girl b4 eva though i hav dated some girl in d past. The major problem now is dat am 4rm the middle belt & she is an Igbo girl & all my friends are saying dat Igbo first daughter are not allow to marry outside their tribe & that my girl parent will do anything to keep us apart & dis is seriously disturbing me causing me sleepless night. Eva when i discuss with my girl about it, she said it's not true & re-assure me of her love 4 me, dat it's me she love & dat she didn't want to marry someone else & her heart will still be with me. My relationship in d past didn't work bcos i always hide my real identity but my girl now know virtually everything about me likewise myself & she is a dedication Catholic member. Please & please pals i need help bcos dis is eating me up & am tempted to double date in d event where d worse happen (my girl parent opposing me), at dsame time am afraid my girl will be highly disappointed in me if i cheat on her & even if she didn't know, i can't stand the guilt. Your kind & mature advice will highly be appreciated. Please help!
Posted: at 23-04-2011 06:23 PM (14 years ago) | Newbie
l am not from there anyway.bt l don,t think is true.cos l have seen igbo women as in first daugter married to benin man.and another one to an ishan man both been married for over tweenty years now and happy with their children.click to ur babe and don.t make any mistake that will cause u ur relationship.
Posted: at 23-04-2011 06:40 PM (14 years ago) | Upcoming
@-poster where did you get that information from huh get your fact right ok! cuz any Igbo first daughter can marry any tribe or nationality with or without the family approval.but its always advisable and nice if the family is behind the person involve.
Posted: at 23-04-2011 07:04 PM (14 years ago) | Gistmaniac
thanks dearie. l think hapiness is what matter not what people say.this guy has not meet the family of this girl and he is already scared.what will hapen if he get to meet the family and they say no at the first instance.that means he will run away for the second alternative not trying atall to fight and prove to the family that he really love their daugter enough to give her security in marriage.
Posted: at 23-04-2011 07:50 PM (14 years ago) | Upcoming
Why can't we tell him the truth, it really exists my brother, it normally a problem in the family but with love you guys can conquer it. Nigerians discriminates alot. Thats why our First Lady said, "we should love our fellow Nigerians irrespective of their NATIONALITY".lol
Posted: at 24-04-2011 12:27 PM (14 years ago) | Newbie
akunneobosi at 24-04-2011 12:38 PM (14 years ago) (m)
pls this is not true talk that 1st igbo Daugther not allow to marry another tribes ,its happening in all tribes it depends on an individuals ,so ur telling if Dangota son come to your family to marry yoour 1st DAUGTHER you will say that your Daugther cant marry another tribe?please igbos are not like that oh,my elder sister i1st DAUGTHER married a yaruba man oh,am igbo from Anambra state ok
Posted: at 24-04-2011 12:38 PM (14 years ago) | Newbie
ugochuks at 24-04-2011 12:50 PM (14 years ago) (m)
Quote from: Ezeoha1 on 24-04-2011 12:27 PM
Why can't we tell him the truth, it really exists my brother, it normally a problem in the family but with love you guys can conquer it. Nigerians discriminates alot. Thats why our First Lady said, "we should love our fellow Nigerians irrespective of their NATIONALITY".lol
well maybe it happened only in ur family,,,are u really sure u re igbo? even if u re then sorry cos in my family ANYBODY FIT MARRY ANYBODY!!! OUR FIRST LADY TOO MUCH OOH!!
I MISS U WHEN I KNOW U RE MISSIN ME
Posted: at 24-04-2011 12:50 PM (14 years ago) | Upcoming
soljurn16 at 24-04-2011 12:57 PM (14 years ago) (m)
@poster.., start making marriage plans becos that tell-tale story about igbo 1st daughter is not true Q.E.D, and dnt make a mistake of double dating cos u will definitely hurt her...,send my I.V...,
Posted: at 24-04-2011 12:57 PM (14 years ago) | Upcoming
oladunsegun at 24-04-2011 01:03 PM (14 years ago) (m)
its quite unfortunate that you find your self in this situation First, your lady has promised you on the fact she know, why don't you believed her second, have you get intouch with her perent to know your stand third, have you find out the fact or situation about this - found out the truth and you shall be saved read history and facts about Igbo tradiction to get yourself the true so why borther get on my brother
Posted: at 24-04-2011 01:03 PM (14 years ago) | Newbie
Chimereze at 24-04-2011 01:07 PM (14 years ago) (m)
Why are you afraid? Why do you want to allow biased theory to cloud your mind? Have you propose to the lady? Have you paid a visit to her family?. Issues concerning marriage is based on different families views, your prospective inlaw may love you irrespective of your tribe. My elder sister ( she is my father 's first daughter) married an Edo man and they are living happily. There is no law in Igboland that forbids her first daughters not to marry a foreigner/or somebody from another tribe. The more likely problem may be the outcaste issue in which most Igbos still practise( not allowing freeborn/son of the soil to marry the untouchables). Do not be afraid rather be encouraged.
Posted: at 24-04-2011 01:07 PM (14 years ago) | Newbie
Poor NP forum. We are now saddled with this unorganized and self-deceit request. It is all about love and you seem to be lacking in it for the Igbo girl.
Igbo people are the most versatile people in Nigeria. In addition, Igbo women are the most compromising women in the country. I am not sure how old the Poster/Author is and how far he has traveled the country. One thing is certain here, he has not made up his mind as to who to love. He has already thrown in the towel before the fight began. In addition, he has organized a spare woman in case the in-laws to-be reject him. How wonderful. Men, he is not ready for marriage, and for the fear he has, truth be told, is that he may be a Muslim and his parents would not allow him marry a Christian. The reverse-psychology he trying to adopt is haunting his ego and his thinking peripheries.
In my extended family back home, Orlu, Imo State, Nigeria, two Middle Belt women have been married to the family over 30 yrs. They speak Igbo, belong to all the groups and enjoy all the cultural things with other women. Igbo people are not stuck-ups like other people in Nigeria period.
Posted: at 24-04-2011 01:34 PM (14 years ago) | Upcoming
dirtykid at 24-04-2011 01:38 PM (14 years ago) (m)
@ Poster: Who feed you up with all those lies ? or is that a way/trick you want to hook hands on, to start cheating on your girl ? Why don't you try to visit the family first and hear from the parents what they have to say to you, than listening to untruthful words from your source. With my experience the Igbo's don't have time for such discrimination when it comes to their Daughters choices for marriage.
DirtyKid is a Happy Kid !!.....FATHER !! I've cast my bread on the waters long time ago. Now it's time 4u to return it, well buttered !!
Posted: at 24-04-2011 01:38 PM (14 years ago) | Hero
ogelamod at 24-04-2011 01:39 PM (14 years ago) (f)
i am an addicted reader of naijapals,i had to sign up to post a comment about this issue. 1st @poster i commend u for giving us all the infos.but this one is not correct. 2ndly the guy in question has not even met the ladies parents and he is already thinking of double dating,he is not a serious guy.no offence meant. 3rdly i am a proud first ibo daughter,from abia and imo state respectively,and there is no such law or tradition as to not marry who u want.a friend of mine just married a british man his father is an ibo chief ,my cousin married a delta guy,all 1st daughters.so pls dont generalise issues.
Posted: at 24-04-2011 01:39 PM (14 years ago) | Newbie
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