Just know this: the woman in your life? She's hiding more secrets than these, including a few you'd never imagine. Lucky you—you get to spend a lifetime learning them all.
1. Everything women buy for themselves—shoes, a skirt, even just stuff from the drugstore—really costs 20 percent more than they tell their spouse.
Just because it's a classic sitcom plot doesn't mean it isn't true. Sometimes my wife'll buy an outfit and charge half of it on our savings and pay for the other half in cash so I don't know what she's actually spending. Yeah, we know honesty is the best policy, hiding your spending habits is bad, blah blah blah. But sometimes women just don't want the hassle of arguing over the price of the fancy shampoo. Is that so wrong? Women don't think so.
2. Women actually think about sex—with you!—a lot.
Sometimes women think about it all day long. It's just that by the end of the day they're too damn tired to do anything about it. Now, if you could only catch her at lunchtime…
3. Women are just as nervous about commitment as you are.
True, many girls grow up dreaming of Prince Charming, the white wedding, and happily ever after. But women're human, just like you, and when it comes down to the reality of tying our life to another person's, they get scared, too. "The idea of getting married completely freaked me out at first," says a member, Bimbo on our facebook page from Nigeria. "I know this sounds like a guy cliché, but I saw it as giving up my independence and being tied down." The good news is, once we're hitched, we're generally pretty delighted about it. Says Bimbo, "Now that I am married, having a life commitment is so comforting and wonderful. I love knowing that we are a team and that we're going to be on the same team forever."
4. Women may be modern and independent, but they still want you to be "the man."
They do want you to be sensitive, caring 21st-century males, but even the most ass-kicking, take-no-prisoners woman still wants to feel taken care of by her man somehow. Whether that means you take charge in bed, know how to fix the car and kill spiders, or even just carry the big suitcase when we're on vacation—when you act all manly, even if you're 98 pounds soaking wet, it makes us feel more feminine, more safe.
"I love that my friends and family always comment on how my husband opens the door for me and does all kinds of other chivalrous things—especially when I was pregnant, when he was so protective of me and my belly," says Lola, 29, of Abuja, Nigeria. "At the end of the day, being in his strong arms is definitely a good feeling, no matter how independent I know I am."
5. A Women's ex-boyfriends were not completely terrible in bed.
You know how a woman is always telling you things like, "No one does it like you do"? Um, yeah. Well, she may have been stretching the truth just a teensy bit. But she'll never actually tell you that a past lover was a bedroom dynamo—she'is smarter than that. Just know that whatever toe-curling orgasms the other guy gave her, sex with you really is a million times better—because it's you, and you're the one she really want.
6. Women're scared that they'll turn into their mothers.
Women love their mothers, really. They admire them, They're grateful to them, They think they're the most amazing women on the planet. Women just don't want to be them. That's why one of the worst insults you can hurl at a woman is, "You're acting just like your mother."
But here's one that's even worse: "You're acting just like my mother." It sends a horrible oedipal shiver down her spines—did he marry me because I'm like his mom? Will he start expecting me to cut the crusts off his PB&J? So please, if you value your sex life, never ever compare your wife to your mother. Out loud, anyway.
7. Women want you to be jealous—but just a little bit.
She want you to notice—and care!—when the waiter flirts with her, or when other guys check her out on the street. It makes her feel that she matters to you. But please don't get all Neanderthal and possessive on her. "I'm very loyal, and if my guy can't understand that I would never do anything with anyone else, then that just makes me mad," says Kara from South Africa. So, to recap: Raising your eyebrows when she introduce you to her cute coworker—good. Punching him out—very, very bad.
8. Yes, she fantasize about hot celebrity guys, but that doesn't mean she want you to be them.
Ramsey Nouah is fsexy and all, but can you imagine having to put up with others sharing him with you.
9. She tell her girlfriends more than she admit to you (but less than you fear).
Yes, she tell them about the latest marital spat, complain about her mothers-in-law, and sigh over the hobby that sucks up all your free time. But she doesn't tell them how big your you-know-what is or that you cried in our arms when your dad died. Some things are just too important and intimate to share. "I definitely don't tell my girlfriends details like what my husband said when he proposed, the feeling I have every time I see him look at our daughter, and the little wonderful things he does for me every day," says cheryl. "Those are just for me."
10. She really do notice and appreciate all the chores you do.
Why don't she say so often enough? Because she can't get over all the things you don't do. As for me, for example, I'ms incredibly diligent about keeping a 6-by-10-foot carpeted patch of our apartment vacuumed and cat hair–free, and my wife love that. But it kills she that it never occurs to me to dust the furniture sitting on top of that piece of carpet, or to sweep the hardwood floor adjoining it. Not until she told me four years ago after our children became adults did I know. What a secret!
Blame a woman's lack of positive feedback on that stubborn female belief that there is Only One Right Way to do any given household task—our way. It's probably the real reason why men don't shoulder a greater share of housekeeping duties; women complain about how you did it wrong, so you never want to do it again. (Sounds familiar, right?) Let's make a deal: You promise to dust the lampshade (or wipe down the kitchen counter after you wash the dishes, or take out the garbage and then put a new liner in the can) once in a while, and we promise to sing your praises. Agreed
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