Marriage wahala (Page 4)

God knows that you tried, atleast you never left her when she needed you most. You have a child with her which is such a big blessing cosidering the fact that it took alot of patience and prayers for her to concieve. But dear you also got your life to think about and as long as you are in that relationship with this woman that you call crazy, then you might end up being  crazy yourself. Your child needs atleast one level headed parent and that should be you. Life is hard just as relationships are...but sad as it is , it seems that you got to move on, knowing that you treid your best and the worst is over considering the fact that she atleast got some sanity back and was able to have a baby without complications. Anyways whatever people say or advise you, at the end of the day it has to be your choice and your's alone. Just listen to your inner voice cos that little voice will never lie to you. Good Luck!

Posted: at 21-11-2011 06:49 PM (13 years ago) | Newbie

Try my brother, it will get better i n the future.

Posted: at 21-11-2011 07:27 PM (13 years ago) | Gistmaniac

Well... you started the foundation of you family with disobedient, because you should have resolve it befor getten married so... what you really need to do is :
1) To pray very very hader.

2) To call all your family together and apologize to them & ask for their forgiveness, coz they must be something that makes them to refuse your marriage.

3) Ask them to pray for you & your family, becacuse if your parents tell you that it not be well with you, hmmm my brother only them can change it.

4) Ask them to bless your family, because you never know,if what your wife is going through is from your family, i'm not telling u that; is your family for your information, but in Nigeria anything can happen.

5) Take your woman back to where you live, because she wased all her life for you, base on what u wrote ,
 8 years of dateing + 3yrs of breaking her heart= 11 years +3yrs of marriage without child= 14 + 2 yrs since you send her back home= 16 good years, assumed that she's 29 yrs minus 16 = 13, that means u knew her when she was 13 years old & she had no problem since then.THINK ABOUT IT.

Posted: at 21-11-2011 07:45 PM (13 years ago) | Upcoming

You need serious prayers.

Posted: at 21-11-2011 07:52 PM (13 years ago) | Gistmaniac

you need prayer my brother

Posted: at 21-11-2011 08:35 PM (13 years ago) | Newbie

am not married yet,

Posted: at 21-11-2011 09:20 PM (13 years ago) | Upcoming

My advice to you is leave her in Nigeria, but give her all the support she will need financially.

Posted: at 21-11-2011 10:53 PM (13 years ago) | Gistmaniac

 

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Posted: at 21-11-2011 11:25 PM (13 years ago) | Gistmaniac

Reading through the story, you were in love with this woman for you to go against your family and marry her. You loved her when you said “I do and I will care for you in sickness and in health.” Your wife is sick mentally and you know it, it might have been triggered with a postpartum depression. The birth of a baby can trigger powerful emotions, from excitement to fear and anxiety. An extreme form of postpartum depression can lead to postpartum psychosis, all this can be treated with medication. But you mentioned her sister having the same problem, mental disorder probably runs in the family. Your wife needs you now, if you were in love with her at all this is the time to prove it. You are frustrated about her behavior, and she doesn't know she is doing this to you, she is sick and she needs help. Medically, sending her home will not help as much as living oversea. But spiritually, she can get deliverance faster but not the way you have cleverly sent her packing. Our Nigerian culture treat mental disorders like plaques instead of helping the one affected. A person abandoned and unattended is more dangerous than the mad person on the street. Mental disorder is not a short-term but it is also not necessarily permanent. Most mental disorder resolve after treatment with counseling and or medication, or simply the passing of time accompanied with prayers of course. Others are lifelong and cause ongoing problems for those afflicted and for their families. Mental disorder is a serious disturbances by definition, four out of ten leading causes of disability in the U.S are mental disorders – major depression, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, and obsessive/compulsive disorder and many people suffer from more than one mental disorder at a given time. Some people just struggle for a short time and others are able to live nearly normal lives with regular medication, supportive counseling and nurturing from a loved one. Some will suffer from constant emotional and behavioral chaos, and the risk of violence due to severe depression, feelings of hopelessness, or aggression. Pray for wisdom in helping your wife, this is not the time to abandon her and the child. Bring her back home and get all the resources you can get to help her and let the prayers be going up at the same time. Your nurturing and sincere love and affection is a great healing tool. She needs medical treatment as well as spiritual help. I believe in prayers and miracles, and that's what you should be doing as her husband, don't blame her or her condition. Trust God in healing your wife!

Posted: at 22-11-2011 09:10 AM (13 years ago) | Newbie

Nothing pass God.  Submit fully to him, ur story will surely change for better

Posted: at 22-11-2011 12:19 PM (13 years ago) | Hero