Married to nigerian wife

Date: 16-06-2009 11:33 pm (14 years ago) | Author: Heinz
[1] 2
- at 16-06-2009 11:33 PM (14 years ago)
(m)
I am a swedish man married to my nigerian wife since october last year. We are not doing so good, i wonder if you have any good advice to give.

Before she arrived she always said in the chatroom that she can not live without me, she is deeply in love with me, she loves me more than I can imagine. I cannot understand this. Now when she finally has the opportunity to express all this love, she does nothing. She is happy watching TV alone. She don’t care if I sit close to her or not. If I try to kiss her when she is watching TV I never know if she is in the mood, if she is going to turn her face away or not. This makes me very insecure about our relation. I never know when to express my love, when the time is right for her. I have started to ask her “may I kiss you”, “may I hug you” which I find stupid and unromantic. But the fear of being rejected by her is so devastating.

Since the very first day we met in chatroom I explained to her how important physical contact is to me. I explained to her I need lots of kisses, hugs and other expressions of love. She said she was fine with this. She even told me she need this herself.

I cannot endure the fact that my wife prefer not to touch me, she do not want my kisses, she turns away her mouth when I am trying to kiss her. I find it hard not to receive any hugs or other signs of affection to me. I find it difficult she always having a lot of excuses about why she don’t want physical contact with me. Either she freezes, she is tired, she is watching TV or she has any other excuse of avoiding me. It is true that when I am hugging her and she is in the right mood, she returns my hugs. But not even once since she arrived has she spontaneously hugged me or kissed me. I wonder if she really loves me.

What is love to her? Is it only a commitment, a decision once taken in the past? Should not love result in something sweet, emotional in the presence? Are spouses supposed to live together in an apartment physically separated, as if they were brother or sister, or two friends? When we wake up in the morning she don’t even greets me with a hug or a kiss. Maybe she greets me ‘good morning’, that is all. And when we go to bed she does not want to kiss me or hug me even then.

She says it is because of her African heritage and culture she behaves like this. She says African husband and wife can sit apart from each other, they don’t need any closeness. They don’t hug and kiss, this is something Europeans do. And Europeans they divorce all the time she says.

She had to wait several months to get to see me, her husband. And when she finally sees me and lives with me, she seems to be uninterested in me. She says I am fat, she don’t like my tobacco, she don’t like my country’s food. She complaints about my snoring, and our bed being too small.

Posted: at 16-06-2009 11:33 PM (14 years ago) | Newbie
- shanique at 16-06-2009 11:33 PM (14 years ago)
(f)
what the shitty 4kery 4k is this?

WTSFFIS Huh?

Posted: at 16-06-2009 11:33 PM (14 years ago) | Hero
Reply
- Toks-E at 16-06-2009 11:34 PM (14 years ago)
(m)
Quote from: shanique on 16-06-2009 11:33 PM
what the shitty 4kery 4k is this?

WTSFFIS Huh?

 Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin

Posted: at 16-06-2009 11:34 PM (14 years ago) | Addicted Hero
Reply
- shanique at 16-06-2009 11:34 PM (14 years ago)
(f)
Quote from: Toks-E on 16-06-2009 11:34 PM
Quote from: shanique on 16-06-2009 11:33 PM
what the shitty 4kery 4k is this?

WTSFFIS Huh?

 Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin

 Kiss Kiss Kiss Kiss Kiss

Posted: at 16-06-2009 11:34 PM (14 years ago) | Hero
Reply
- myragonza at 17-06-2009 08:18 AM (14 years ago)
(f)
Quote from: edocouple on 16-06-2009 11:33 PM
I am a swedish man married to my nigerian wife since october last year. We are not doing so good, i wonder if you have any good advice to give.

Before she arrived she always said in the chatroom that she can not live without me, she is deeply in love with me, she loves me more than I can imagine. I cannot understand this. Now when she finally has the opportunity to express all this love, she does nothing. She is happy watching TV alone. She don’t care if I sit close to her or not. If I try to kiss her when she is watching TV I never know if she is in the mood, if she is going to turn her face away or not. This makes me very insecure about our relation. I never know when to express my love, when the time is right for her. I have started to ask her “may I kiss you”, “may I hug you” which I find stupid and unromantic. But the fear of being rejected by her is so devastating.

Since the very first day we met in chatroom I explained to her how important physical contact is to me. I explained to her I need lots of kisses, hugs and other expressions of love. She said she was fine with this. She even told me she need this herself.

I cannot endure the fact that my wife prefer not to touch me, she do not want my kisses, she turns away her mouth when I am trying to kiss her. I find it hard not to receive any hugs or other signs of affection to me. I find it difficult she always having a lot of excuses about why she don’t want physical contact with me. Either she freezes, she is tired, she is watching TV or she has any other excuse of avoiding me. It is true that when I am hugging her and she is in the right mood, she returns my hugs. But not even once since she arrived has she spontaneously hugged me or kissed me. I wonder if she really loves me.

What is love to her? Is it only a commitment, a decision once taken in the past? Should not love result in something sweet, emotional in the presence? Are spouses supposed to live together in an apartment physically separated, as if they were brother or sister, or two friends? When we wake up in the morning she don’t even greets me with a hug or a kiss. Maybe she greets me ‘good morning’, that is all. And when we go to bed she does not want to kiss me or hug me even then.

She says it is because of her African heritage and culture she behaves like this. She says African husband and wife can sit apart from each other, they don’t need any closeness. They don’t hug and kiss, this is something Europeans do. And Europeans they divorce all the time she says.

She had to wait several months to get to see me, her husband. And when she finally sees me and lives with me, she seems to be uninterested in me. She says I am fat, she don’t like my tobacco, she don’t like my country’s food. She complaints about my snoring, and our bed being too small.

i think she is the typical kind of african woman....i mean,no offence....but she is just not the romantic kinda person like u.....u know its difficult for an african born person to adapt to the western lifestyle...she needs plenty of time.....she may have said yes to ur question but u can't expect someone to change just like that...........

Posted: at 17-06-2009 08:18 AM (14 years ago) | Addicted Hero
Reply
- Pires07 at 17-06-2009 02:01 PM (14 years ago)
(m)
gosh t00 loNg!!!

Posted: at 17-06-2009 02:01 PM (14 years ago) | Gistmaniac
Reply
- mazi at 17-06-2009 02:04 PM (14 years ago)
(m)
if na true.....oriala gi mugu!
Posted: at 17-06-2009 02:04 PM (14 years ago) | Hero
Reply
- Pires07 at 17-06-2009 02:08 PM (14 years ago)
(m)
lol, oburula maga?

Posted: at 17-06-2009 02:08 PM (14 years ago) | Gistmaniac
Reply
- PreetyInstinct at 17-06-2009 02:21 PM (14 years ago)
(f)
@POster i understand how u feel :(ermmm but wat advise do u want us 2 give?i think u should just try and be more patient and pray about it ok don't loose ur cool and be strong....god bless laters.

@Pires so no simple hello frm u nawa ooo.......

Posted: at 17-06-2009 02:21 PM (14 years ago) | Hero
Reply
- shanique at 17-06-2009 02:24 PM (14 years ago)
(f)
........

Posted: at 17-06-2009 02:24 PM (14 years ago) | Hero
Reply
- PreetyInstinct at 17-06-2009 02:31 PM (14 years ago)
(f)
 Huh?

Posted: at 17-06-2009 02:31 PM (14 years ago) | Hero
Reply
- mazi at 17-06-2009 02:36 PM (14 years ago)
(m)
Quote from: Pires07 on 17-06-2009 02:08 PM
lol, oburula maga?

d babe don play a fast one...
Posted: at 17-06-2009 02:36 PM (14 years ago) | Hero
Reply
- vivian07 at 17-06-2009 02:45 PM (14 years ago)
(f)
@ poster, shit happens... give her more time, and show her love..
Posted: at 17-06-2009 02:45 PM (14 years ago) | Hero
Reply
- Kennee at 17-06-2009 02:47 PM (14 years ago)
(m)
Quote from: edocouple on 16-06-2009 11:33 PM
I am a swedish man married to my nigerian wife since october last year. We are not doing so good, i wonder if you have any good advice to give.

Before she arrived she always said in the chatroom that she can not live without me, she is deeply in love with me, she loves me more than I can imagine. I cannot understand this. Now when she finally has the opportunity to express all this love, she does nothing. She is happy watching TV alone. She don’t care if I sit close to her or not. If I try to kiss her when she is watching TV I never know if she is in the mood, if she is going to turn her face away or not. This makes me very insecure about our relation. I never know when to express my love, when the time is right for her. I have started to ask her “may I kiss you”, “may I hug you” which I find stupid and unromantic. But the fear of being rejected by her is so devastating.

Since the very first day we met in chatroom I explained to her how important physical contact is to me. I explained to her I need lots of kisses, hugs and other expressions of love. She said she was fine with this. She even told me she need this herself.

I cannot endure the fact that my wife prefer not to touch me, she do not want my kisses, she turns away her mouth when I am trying to kiss her. I find it hard not to receive any hugs or other signs of affection to me. I find it difficult she always having a lot of excuses about why she don’t want physical contact with me. Either she freezes, she is tired, she is watching TV or she has any other excuse of avoiding me. It is true that when I am hugging her and she is in the right mood, she returns my hugs. But not even once since she arrived has she spontaneously hugged me or kissed me. I wonder if she really loves me.

What is love to her? Is it only a commitment, a decision once taken in the past? Should not love result in something sweet, emotional in the presence? Are spouses supposed to live together in an apartment physically separated, as if they were brother or sister, or two friends? When we wake up in the morning she don’t even greets me with a hug or a kiss. Maybe she greets me ‘good morning’, that is all. And when we go to bed she does not want to kiss me or hug me even then.

She says it is because of her African heritage and culture she behaves like this. She says African husband and wife can sit apart from each other, they don’t need any closeness. They don’t hug and kiss, this is something Europeans do. And Europeans they divorce all the time she says.

She had to wait several months to get to see me, her husband. And when she finally sees me and lives with me, she seems to be uninterested in me. She says I am fat, she don’t like my tobacco, she don’t like my country’s food. She complaints about my snoring, and our bed being too small.

Well, What she's doing has nothing to do with African Heritage or Culture... Yu've met the wrong woman. l normally don't support Divorce but l think she's not worth yur energy.

Get rid of her, she's there for the Financila Comfort only

Posted: at 17-06-2009 02:47 PM (14 years ago) | Addicted Hero
Reply
- Kennee at 17-06-2009 02:51 PM (14 years ago)
(m)
Quote from: shanique on 16-06-2009 11:33 PM
what the shitty 4kery 4k is this?

WTSFFIS Huh?

Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Grin Yeye girl

Posted: at 17-06-2009 02:51 PM (14 years ago) | Addicted Hero
Reply
- Katee at 17-06-2009 02:56 PM (14 years ago)
(f)
 Cheesy Cheesy the girl don catch MUGU  Grin
oyinbo, sorry ooo,
God go give u ur wife  Grin
Posted: at 17-06-2009 02:56 PM (14 years ago) | Upcoming
Reply
- Kennee at 17-06-2009 03:00 PM (14 years ago)
(m)
Abi ooo my Sista... D Guy meet yahoo babe

Posted: at 17-06-2009 03:00 PM (14 years ago) | Addicted Hero
Reply
- mazi at 17-06-2009 04:31 PM (14 years ago)
(m)
she wan enter europe....dat was a free ride plus some fat change
Posted: at 17-06-2009 04:31 PM (14 years ago) | Hero
Reply
- around_d_corner at 17-06-2009 04:35 PM (14 years ago)
(m)
pathic and lng story..........
Posted: at 17-06-2009 04:35 PM (14 years ago) | Hero
Reply
- Katee at 17-06-2009 06:08 PM (14 years ago)
(f)
e be like say d guy no hear about Nigerians before him say him wan marry her
if not, him 4 think twice


guy, u do well as u help my sister enter obodo oyibo,
now settle her make she waka fast fast
Posted: at 17-06-2009 06:08 PM (14 years ago) | Upcoming
Reply
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