![-]( "brendivas") brendivas at 3-04-2011 10:59 PM (14 years ago)  (f) For me i will take it like a man and pretend that it doesn't happen, while i will look for a peaceful way to make her understand and stop it
wot if she is not ready to listen frm d first time and it happens again ?
It means the relationship is not working. Put an end to it. | Posted: at 3-04-2011 10:59 PM (14 years ago) | Upcoming | |
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![-]( "ceejay58") ceejay58 at 3-04-2011 11:17 PM (14 years ago) (m) put an AK47 to his chest and pull d trigger. Lol.
mhh dat will be too fast. d best thing is to make him feel u have forgiven him & wait till dinner time, mix some OTAPIAPIA in his food. trust me his life will never remain the same..........HE IS A GONER  na waa ooo..lol | Posted: at 3-04-2011 11:17 PM (14 years ago) | Hero | |
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![-]( "ceejay58") ceejay58 at 4-04-2011 12:09 AM (14 years ago) (m) But seriously it's only an insensitive and immature person who 'll always want to insult his/her partner at the slightest of any provocation. when u love someone all u ought to care about should be the person's happiness.. u ought to respect their feelings.. and even when there is an argument or quarrel between them one has to be careful concerning one's choice of words... Now in the case of the poster i ask.... have u find time (i mean when he's in good mode) to discuss this issues with him and try to make him realize how deeply his insulting words hurts u? and what were his reactions? If he still carry on after u ve both talked about it without given any tot about ur feelings then just be sincere with urself and tell urself the truth... such a r/ship is heading for the rocks... perhaps he feels that maybe the only way to tell u he's had enough.. but if u think u can continue to take in all that as a submissive partner well, God help u... but never u retaliate or counter him with hot and abusive words in the hit of the argument.. cos that can be very very unpleasant. esp when u know u don't stand a chance with him in case fight ensue. | Posted: at 4-04-2011 12:09 AM (14 years ago) | Hero | |
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![-]( "Ajento") Ajento at 4-04-2011 03:56 AM (14 years ago) (m) Verbal insults hurts and lasts more than physical abuse, it should not be tolerated. | Posted: at 4-04-2011 03:56 AM (14 years ago) | Gistmaniac | |
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Verbal insults hurts and lasts more than physical abuse, it should not be tolerated.
Correct!
Live and let live! | Posted: at 4-04-2011 08:57 AM (14 years ago) | Hero | |
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![-]( "ajanni") ajanni at 4-04-2011 09:19 AM (14 years ago) (m) In every relationship (good or bad one) we have arguements.
As matured people we should be ready to take the test and solve the problem, but
what happens if your bf/gf/wife/hubby insult u everytime when u are arguing about something?
Maybe u can solve the problem but u can not forget about all those ugly words u heard.
How do u handle this person? What would u do in this situation? Thx in advance  let him/her knows that you are not very comfortable with such an insults and recklessness | Posted: at 4-04-2011 09:19 AM (14 years ago) | Grande Master | |
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![-]( "kebella") kebella at 4-04-2011 09:35 AM (14 years ago) (f) That's verbal abuse and it's a misguided attempt by an insecure & manipulative spouse to exercise control & establish dominance in a relationship.By intimidating u,nullifying ur every objection or request,and insulting u, ur spouse feels that he or she can maintain authority over u and ur relationship.He/she torments u with mind games and name-calling,and then demands an apology from u. In a couple, partners are supposed to love & respect one another! It is never acceptable for one to carry all the weight in a relationship & treat his or her partner like a slave.
Don't accept repression & cruelty as a part of relationship/marriage!
Take a look inward and carefully examine why & how u allowed ur spouse's verbal abuse to control u. While u certainly needn't take responsibility for ur spouse's repressive and malicious behavior, it's helpful to consider d reasons behind ur submission to such unjustifiable treatment.
Maybe u cling to ur spouse for fear of abandonment.Whatever d reason,u must initiate ur own healing process.Open yourself to ur fears - and confront them.
The next step is to face ur partner.Describe d abuse exactly to him or her. If he/she becomes defensive & angry, gently tell him/her that this is d type of behavior that's hurting u.Refuse to yield to his/her accusations & manipulations.
Tell ur partner that u'will no longer accept his/her degradation.Set and stick to specific consequences if ur partner verbally attacks u even after u've spoken to him/her about it.Make sure d punishment is not too severe or too lenient.Don't expect ur spouse's abusive behavior to simply end, but allow time for ur partner to accept what has happened & forgive him/ herself.
Throughout d process,remind urself that u have done d right thing for u and for ur partner.
she got yu right there
my name is kebella  ........yu already no that  ...heheh...if yu wanna smell what kebella is cooking........bring it up!! | Posted: at 4-04-2011 09:35 AM (14 years ago) | Addicted Hero | |
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Sometimes its better 4 one of the couple 2 walk away frm the scene...instead of stayin and claiming rights wit the other...one has 2 step down for the other...thr cant be 2 captains in one ship...when arguement arises smtimes its beta to kip mute!  | Posted: at 4-04-2011 09:51 AM (14 years ago) | Gistmaniac | |
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![-]( "kebella") kebella at 4-04-2011 09:54 AM (14 years ago) (f)
my name is kebella ........yu already no that ...heheh...if yu wanna smell what kebella is cooking........bring it up!! | Posted: at 4-04-2011 09:54 AM (14 years ago) | Addicted Hero | |
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Verbal insults hurts and lasts more than physical abuse, it should not be tolerated.
Gbam! | Posted: at 4-04-2011 11:32 AM (14 years ago) | Hero | |
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![-]( "blessedme") blessedme at 4-04-2011 11:37 AM (14 years ago) (f) personally i hate insult... i want to learn too | Posted: at 4-04-2011 11:37 AM (14 years ago) | Hero | |
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That's verbal abuse and it's a misguided attempt by an insecure & manipulative spouse to exercise control & establish dominance in a relationship.By intimidating u,nullifying ur every objection or request,and insulting u, ur spouse feels that he or she can maintain authority over u and ur relationship.He/she torments u with mind games and name-calling,and then demands an apology from u. In a couple, partners are supposed to love & respect one another! It is never acceptable for one to carry all the weight in a relationship & treat his or her partner like a slave.
Don't accept repression & cruelty as a part of relationship/marriage!
Take a look inward and carefully examine why & how u allowed ur spouse's verbal abuse to control u. While u certainly needn't take responsibility for ur spouse's repressive and malicious behavior, it's helpful to consider d reasons behind ur submission to such unjustifiable treatment.
Maybe u cling to ur spouse for fear of abandonment.Whatever d reason,u must initiate ur own healing process.Open yourself to ur fears - and confront them.
The next step is to face ur partner.Describe d abuse exactly to him or her. If he/she becomes defensive & angry, gently tell him/her that this is d type of behavior that's hurting u.Refuse to yield to his/her accusations & manipulations.
Tell ur partner that u'will no longer accept his/her degradation.Set and stick to specific consequences if ur partner verbally attacks u even after u've spoken to him/her about it.Make sure d punishment is not too severe or too lenient.Don't expect ur spouse's abusive behavior to simply end, but allow time for ur partner to accept what has happened & forgive him/ herself.
Throughout d process,remind urself that u have done d right thing for u and for ur partner.
she got yu right there 
Live and let live! | Posted: at 4-04-2011 11:38 AM (14 years ago) | Hero | |
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![-]( "truenaija2") truenaija2 at 4-04-2011 11:40 AM (14 years ago) (f) just tell the person it makes me sad when u throw insults at me , i would be very glad f we can have agruements without insults , the person doesnt read your mind so he might not know how you feel or its an habit and he doesnt know its bad, communication does the magic | Posted: at 4-04-2011 11:40 AM (14 years ago) | Gistmaniac | |
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![-]( "truenaija2") truenaija2 at 4-04-2011 11:41 AM (14 years ago) (f) In every relationship (good or bad one) we have arguements.
As matured people we should be ready to take the test and solve the problem, but
what happens if your bf/gf/wife/hubby insult u everytime when u are arguing about something?
Maybe u can solve the problem but u can not forget about all those ugly words u heard.
How do u handle this person? What would u do in this situation? Thx in advance let him/her knows that you are not very comfortable with such an insults and recklessness exactly | Posted: at 4-04-2011 11:41 AM (14 years ago) | Gistmaniac | |
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![-]( "truenaija2") truenaija2 at 4-04-2011 11:43 AM (14 years ago) (f) In every relationship (good or bad one) we have arguements.
As matured people we should be ready to take the test and solve the problem, but
what happens if your bf/gf/wife/hubby insult u everytime when u are arguing about something?
Maybe u can solve the problem but u can not forget about all those ugly words u heard.
How do u handle this person? What would u do in this situation? Thx in advance People always React impulsively to such Matters, unless yu've Learned some Self-control Learn Self-Control tactics in Advance and teach it to yur Partner too... Dat's the way l think it can be Handled exactly | Posted: at 4-04-2011 11:43 AM (14 years ago) | Gistmaniac | |
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But seriously it's only an insensitive and immature person who 'll always want to insult his/her partner at the slightest of any provocation. when u love someone all u ought to care about should be the person's happiness.. u ought to respect their feelings.. and even when there is an argument or quarrel between them one has to be careful concerning one's choice of words...
Now in the case of the poster i ask.... have u find time (i mean when he's in good mode) to discuss this issues with him and try to make him realize how deeply his insulting words hurts u? and what were his reactions?
If he still carry on after u ve both talked about it without given any tot about ur feelings then just be sincere with urself and tell urself the truth... such a r/ship is heading for the rocks... perhaps he feels that maybe the only way to tell u he's had enough..
but if u think u can continue to take in all that as a submissive partner well, God help u... but never u retaliate or counter him with hot and abusive words in the hit of the argument.. cos that can be very very unpleasant. esp when u know u don't stand a chance with him in case fight ensue.
Nice reply. But my dear its not for me...one of my best friends get dis problem.
She dont knw why her man always abuse her like dat, bcos after they settle d arguement she
can not forgt abt d insults....Its difficult bcos she rily luv dis man. | Posted: at 4-04-2011 12:23 PM (14 years ago) | Addicted Hero | |
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Sometimes its better 4 one of the couple 2 walk away frm the scene...instead of stayin and claiming rights wit the other...one has 2 step down for the other...thr cant be 2 captains in one ship...when arguement arises smtimes its beta to kip mute!
My friend tried dis b4 but she not feel comfortable goin outside knowin she got problem at home... | Posted: at 4-04-2011 12:25 PM (14 years ago) | Addicted Hero | |
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![-]( "diplomatik") diplomatik at 4-04-2011 12:26 PM (14 years ago) (f) That's verbal abuse and it's a misguided attempt by an insecure & manipulative spouse to exercise control & establish dominance in a relationship.By intimidating u,nullifying ur every objection or request,and insulting u, ur spouse feels that he or she can maintain authority over u and ur relationship.He/she torments u with mind games and name-calling,and then demands an apology from u. In a couple, partners are supposed to love & respect one another! It is never acceptable for one to carry all the weight in a relationship & treat his or her partner like a slave.
Don't accept repression & cruelty as a part of relationship/marriage!
Take a look inward and carefully examine why & how u allowed ur spouse's verbal abuse to control u. While u certainly needn't take responsibility for ur spouse's repressive and malicious behavior, it's helpful to consider d reasons behind ur submission to such unjustifiable treatment.
Maybe u cling to ur spouse for fear of abandonment.Whatever d reason,u must initiate ur own healing process.Open yourself to ur fears - and confront them.
The next step is to face ur partner.Describe d abuse exactly to him or her. If he/she becomes defensive & angry, gently tell him/her that this is d type of behavior that's hurting u.Refuse to yield to his/her accusations & manipulations.
Tell ur partner that u'will no longer accept his/her degradation.Set and stick to specific consequences if ur partner verbally attacks u even after u've spoken to him/her about it.Make sure d punishment is not too severe or too lenient.Don't expect ur spouse's abusive behavior to simply end, but allow time for ur partner to accept what has happened & forgive him/ herself.
Throughout d process,remind urself that u have done d right thing for u and for ur partner.
u've seen me right?  i look kool right? ???but don't send me mails asking for my add or phone no. and don't give it to me either  , i'll ask u if i want it ..ok...kool | Posted: at 4-04-2011 12:26 PM (14 years ago) | Addicted Hero | |
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Live and let live! | Posted: at 4-04-2011 12:35 PM (14 years ago) | Hero | |
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thank u | Posted: at 4-04-2011 12:36 PM (14 years ago) | Addicted Hero | |
Reply |
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