I am tireedd of my MARRIAGE!!! (Page 7)

Nne nwa, i dey mange hopin say one day i go turn to manger

so shall it be.....am not just happy today

the fact is I need advices, support, anything to get me out of this situation.  I am soooo tired of my marriage and my husband, I am so tired of it all, playing all those mind games, trying to understand him, making efforts, shutting my mouth when hurt, not telling him what I really feel to not hurt his ego, going through hell in my personnal life without the right to complain,  I even reached the point of regretting marrying him and having a child with him, lately I've been wishing to go back to my single days and never ever marry in my life.

My husband is nothing terrible, which, in some aspects is even worse, he is proud and selfish, but also very "unchangeable", always the same, he enjoys smoking, drinking, hanging out with friends, he dreams about big money but just manages a small job. Other htan that he is honest, a good father (if I keep low expectations), doesn't beat me or anything like that, he participates in the home financial expenses and so on,  BUT no plans for the future, we never discuss anything, anytime we are together, I am just doing my thing while he's doing his. I'm going to bed alone every night. he has stopped clubbing so much but the first few years of marriage he would go out to club everynight (even if I was pregnant and alone at home) or at least a few times a week (when I was alone with a baby).

I don't share anything with him. I thought our relationship will grow more intimate with time but it seems it's getting worse. He was not much of a talker when we dated, now we don't even share more than the necessary daily life talks (what's for dinner and so on). we never share a meal together, even on week ends. he takes a nap after the baby takes his so we don't go out together. he never offers to have a "date" or anything to do together.  he stays stuck to his laptop at night and only comes to bed long after I'm asleep.

I make it sound like he is the one having all the faults but it's not true, I also have my own faults, I made mistakes in our relationship, I am very aware of it. It took time for us to know each other better, to understand our cultures and differences, and I have made a LOT of efforts. I wouldn't mind him telling me if anything I did was wrong, I just wanted a happy home and a blissful marriage, and I invested a lot in this relationship.

Now, when I look back, I have this bitter feeling that I was alone doing all of that. Though he did make some efforts, I never saw him making any "costly" effort. He'd never sacrifice anything or go out of his comfort zone for me. As time passes, I feel like I am an "investment" to him, nothing more than a watch or a car, something to take out on special occasions, to complete the picture of a "successful man" he wishes to show around.

I honestly don't know if he realizes how bad I feel about our relationship, despite my many attempts to talk to him. I'm sure we could stay married like that forever, I'd just be his maid, raised his kids, shut up about my feelings and personality,  and he'd come back every night to have dinner and believe he "achieved" something in life,

I am so sorry I poured out my life like that on a forum, and I really hope to get serious advices, maybe some hints on how to get things going from now,

Thank you

thanks for ur advice @DP

@mallorca i am getting lots of wonderful advice here n i know a lot of peopler learning tooo , naijapals should b where we can learn too not just jokee


n everyoneelse in the house i really appreciate ur totfullness

wetin dey make u open your teeth