mallorca
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HOPE IS MY ROAD,VICTORY IS MY DESTINY
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unu di egwu Reply  my name is kebella  ........yu already no that  ...heheh...if yu wanna smell what kebella is cooking........bring it up!!
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unu dikwa egwu nime egwu Reply HOPE IS MY ROAD,VICTORY IS MY DESTINY
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nwanna na alu nwanne ya Reply unu abu ndi hausa  my name is kebella ........yu already no that ...heheh...if yu wanna smell what kebella is cooking........bring it up!!
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Quote from: kebella on 11-09-2011 01:32 PM nwanna na alu nwanne ya well 98% of my kinsmen married from our place......mine will not be difrent unu abu ndi hausa HOPE IS MY ROAD,VICTORY IS MY DESTINY
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odikwa terrible Reply congrats my name is kebella ........yu already no that ...heheh...if yu wanna smell what kebella is cooking........bring it up!!
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Dear Poster, You have started and ended with the truth. I commend you because you stand proudly for Nigerians and you also stand for the truth. Your statement is 100% true …other cultures have morals, ethical standards {and values}, it‘s not just Nigerians. No matter what anyone says to themselves and others; or think to themselves…that is the logical and factual truth of the matter. Circumstances affect Nigerians, and circumstances affects others in their culture as well. People are people no matter what ethnic group or culture they come from. The real question is, what you know about the other culture is it really the truth or is it lies? And does it really apply to the person in question? As you rightly said, much is based on stereotypes and I add, preconceived notions, false perceptions and false pride. Just because someone narrates a story doesn’t mean all of what they are saying is true. Some people think more of themselves than they ought to. Some use people as their standard, when people are not the standard (example: American culture period). Just as we all know, there are many things going on inside Nigeria but is everyone included or apart of it? No! All Nigerians are not 419 nor do all use juju..or whatever others are saying on the outside. And it is the same in every other place and culture. There are people in other cultures who are living contrary to the negative image that is being shown. Of course, one still has to be careful, but one should be basing this very important decision of marriage on facts and not lies, nor misconceptions, false pride, distortions of the truth or prejudices. One should also be very careful to ensure that one does not pit themselves against God in trying to interfere and impose their own will over God’s in relationships that he has brought together. God knows the destiny of both, and only God sees from the beginning to the end. And, if you are one that has done this, you shouldn’t blame God at all when it comes time to eat what you have planted. There are many successful marriages from all different cultures…Nigerians, white Americans, black Americans, etc.…I know many African-American couples young and older, who have been married for years; some even 20, 30 plus…the only thing is that those successful marriages rarely get much publicity or media coverage. There are marriages from all different cultures that are destroyed as well. Some relationships were laced with violence, unfaithfulness, deceit, others got pregnant from another man but said it’s the husband’s, racism and prejudices, outsider interferences, and family hostile interferences, etc. The list is too numerous. There are successful Nigerian and African-American, Nigerian and white-American, Nigerian and Spaniard, etc. couples as well. Many shared the bulk of the beginning issues came from outside of their marriage not within; and those who were not even in the marriage, related or non-related did so much…including juju to try and destroy their marriage. The couple has to learn about each others culture, if they didn’t know already, and the two together carried on from there. We all know that there are many Nigerian and African-American, white-American, etc., couples who did not make it…the reasons are numerous from both sides. Stemming from dishonesty, deceit, unfaithfulness, disrespect, etc…and again outside interference. EXAMPLE: I have seen “live” a Nigerian guy who was friends with some Nigerian girls, but he had no interest in marring any of them. The guy now marries a black-American, white-American, Hispanic, Asian, European, etc. This guy married a Christian African-American. The Nigerian girls began to do levels big time. In front of the guy, the Nigerian girls would act all nice but when the guy wasn’t around those same girls would do all kinds of non-sense and try to disrespect the girl that guy chose for a wife. The Nigerian girls used the culture to try and drive a wedge between the husband and the wife. The husband’s eyes saw nothing, the Nigerian girls outside the marriage succeeded there (only at first). The Nigerian girls tried juju on the wife but it didn’t work. So, those 9ja girls now did juju on the guy through food and gifts, to turn the guy against his wife. The guy began reacting…doing all kinds of bad to his wife. Flirting and sleeping around with slimy behaving girls which endangered the wife’s life. The guy even began beating up his wife and defending the honor of the 9ja girls who was interring in and destroying his marriage while controlling him and forcing him to do what they wanted him to do with the use of juju. Do you know what happened? The husband allowed the 9ja girls to destroy his marriage. After he and wife divorced, the guy’s eye now cleared. The guy really did love his wife. He said she was a good woman and they had a great relationship; she was very respectful to him, faithful, loving, etc. He even went back after her, but it was now too late. Many Nigerian guys, do mix well with other ethnic groups but If I may share some sisterly advice; because I've see this happen more often. Please be careful…if you choose to marry a woman other than Nigerian (or from your ethnic group), please be more observant, listen to and protect your wife. Some do already, but much more do not. I have seen and heard so many things. It is some of the Nigerian woman who have hand in why some foreign wives choose to go back to their homeland instead of living in Nigerian; and sometime juju is involved (they will bragging and talking about it as if it‘s a good thing that they‘ve done). Even, the kids will be watching the dynamics and seeing what many Nigerian husbands do not see and how it is affecting their mother. This has a lot to do with those children from Nigerian and foreign women marriage unions deciding not to live or return to Nigeria more than not. There is a huge affect, as women are not suppose to be over-riding the men’s will for their own life. I do understand that some ethnic groups wish their group to continue and will force or try to force (through juju if necessary) their kids to marry from their own group. To each his or her own, but one should just be honest and not deceive innocent people if that is your choice. Please do not take this in a way other than what I mean. There many successful Nigerians everywhere, just like others from other ethnic groups or cultures. With my eyes I have also seen some Nigerians strung out on drugs, into one dirty business or another, in jail or on probation, saying they are married when they are not but have many kids all over, married but one sleeping around; married but both sleeping around; saying they are not married when they are and with kids, tried to runs levels on a foreign woman but she got wise and made they guy pay (no juju though), married and making babies with a foreign woman and abandoned them both. I have seen some Nigerian women use men to make a living…up to 4-5 men, collecting money from more than 5 plus men, using juju to take them away from their family and kids, using them to pay for their apartments, housing, expenses, etc., getting pregnant numerous times and aborting the pregnancies, being married and getting pregnant from another man and saying it’s the husband’s, destroying unsuspecting Nigerian men relationships and controlling them at the same time through manipulation and/or juju, being disrespectful to her husband, yelling and screaming and cursing her head off, etc. The list is an on-going one. But is this only with Nigerians? Capital No! All cultures have good and bad going on inside them…ALL CULTURES. We first need to check our own self and our motives/reasons for doing the things we do. Those we meet, yes we need to know about them and their culture, family, etc. but there should be no deceptions from the two involved; and all outsiders should be kept outside. The final decision to marry who one heart’s desire is that person’s decision and it should be made with truth and facts (selfish and jealous motives pushed aside). This is for the actual good of the persons involved. Who be akata? Just as many mentally free and sane African-Americans DO NOT accept nor use the N-word. Many mentally free and sane African-Americans who embrace their African heritage DO NOT accept nor use the word akata. Those who know better, take it just as it is…an insult. So, it is better one be correct…say African-American or find a word equivalent. Clearing up another misconception… it is an insult to call an African-American ‘oyibo‘. Our African ancestors did not willingly come to this country; nor did they willingly mix…many were raped. Thus, there are different skin tones or shades among African-Americans. It’s true that whites give lighter-skinned preference out of their own racist mental delusions but that’s a whole other issue. It is the whites who are bent, even to this day, on striving to keep African-Americans economically, institutionally and mentally enslaved. Those who have been or live in the US and have mingled with others other than Africans know the real. Do the whites have to succeed at what they want to do…capital NO! And they don’t with many…there are many African-Americans who do not fit the stereotypes at all but white America will still keep pumping out the stories of the mentally enslaved African-Americans. Whites have their own culture and blacks have their own culture too…there is a difference. Sorry…let me get back on point, which is NO ONE likes to be called or put into the group with the one who is oppressing them. Nor, do anyone like being called something they are not, even if they are from the same country. If someone is Igbo and another decides to call them Hausa…is that right? If someone is Yoruba and another decides to call him Hausa…is that right? This is what’s being done when one calls and African-American ‘white’ just because he/she is from the US. Black Americans heritage is still Africa, no matter what anyone thinks…and no one can ever change it. So, again it is better one be correct…say African-American or find a word equivalent. Poster...well done ooo!
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@mchinwendu ReplyYou are so right and you seriously took the words out of my mouth, I could not have said those statements any better. Thanks for taking the time to write such an in-depth post! Hopefully people will read it and become less subject to harsh racism and racial stereotyping. It's true what they say that there's only one race and that's the human race. God bless =] one by one
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Quote from: mchinwendu on 11-09-2011 05:12 PM Dear Poster, You have started and ended with the truth. I commend you because you stand proudly for Nigerians and you also stand for the truth. Your statement is 100% true …other cultures have morals, ethical standards {and values}, it‘s not just Nigerians. No matter what anyone says to themselves and others; or think to themselves…that is the logical and factual truth of the matter. Circumstances affect Nigerians, and circumstances affects others in their culture as well. People are people no matter what ethnic group or culture they come from. The real question is, what you know about the other culture is it really the truth or is it lies? And does it really apply to the person in question? As you rightly said, much is based on stereotypes and I add, preconceived notions, false perceptions and false pride. Just because someone narrates a story doesn’t mean all of what they are saying is true. Some people think more of themselves than they ought to. Some use people as their standard, when people are not the standard (example: American culture period). Just as we all know, there are many things going on inside Nigeria but is everyone included or apart of it? No! All Nigerians are not 419 nor do all use juju..or whatever others are saying on the outside. And it is the same in every other place and culture. There are people in other cultures who are living contrary to the negative image that is being shown. Of course, one still has to be careful, but one should be basing this very important decision of marriage on facts and not lies, nor misconceptions, false pride, distortions of the truth or prejudices. One should also be very careful to ensure that one does not pit themselves against God in trying to interfere and impose their own will over God’s in relationships that he has brought together. God knows the destiny of both, and only God sees from the beginning to the end. And, if you are one that has done this, you shouldn’t blame God at all when it comes time to eat what you have planted. There are many successful marriages from all different cultures…Nigerians, white Americans, black Americans, etc.…I know many African-American couples young and older, who have been married for years; some even 20, 30 plus…the only thing is that those successful marriages rarely get much publicity or media coverage. There are marriages from all different cultures that are destroyed as well. Some relationships were laced with violence, unfaithfulness, deceit, others got pregnant from another man but said it’s the husband’s, racism and prejudices, outsider interferences, and family hostile interferences, etc. The list is too numerous. There are successful Nigerian and African-American, Nigerian and white-American, Nigerian and Spaniard, etc. couples as well. Many shared the bulk of the beginning issues came from outside of their marriage not within; and those who were not even in the marriage, related or non-related did so much…including juju to try and destroy their marriage. The couple has to learn about each others culture, if they didn’t know already, and the two together carried on from there. We all know that there are many Nigerian and African-American, white-American, etc., couples who did not make it…the reasons are numerous from both sides. Stemming from dishonesty, deceit, unfaithfulness, disrespect, etc…and again outside interference. EXAMPLE: I have seen “live” a Nigerian guy who was friends with some Nigerian girls, but he had no interest in marring any of them. The guy now marries a black-American, white-American, Hispanic, Asian, European, etc. This guy married a Christian African-American. The Nigerian girls began to do levels big time. In front of the guy, the Nigerian girls would act all nice but when the guy wasn’t around those same girls would do all kinds of non-sense and try to disrespect the girl that guy chose for a wife. The Nigerian girls used the culture to try and drive a wedge between the husband and the wife. The husband’s eyes saw nothing, the Nigerian girls outside the marriage succeeded there (only at first). The Nigerian girls tried juju on the wife but it didn’t work. So, those 9ja girls now did juju on the guy through food and gifts, to turn the guy against his wife. The guy began reacting…doing all kinds of bad to his wife. Flirting and sleeping around with slimy behaving girls which endangered the wife’s life. The guy even began beating up his wife and defending the honor of the 9ja girls who was interring in and destroying his marriage while controlling him and forcing him to do what they wanted him to do with the use of juju. Do you know what happened? The husband allowed the 9ja girls to destroy his marriage. After he and wife divorced, the guy’s eye now cleared. The guy really did love his wife. He said she was a good woman and they had a great relationship; she was very respectful to him, faithful, loving, etc. He even went back after her, but it was now too late. Many Nigerian guys, do mix well with other ethnic groups but If I may share some sisterly advice; because I've see this happen more often. Please be careful…if you choose to marry a woman other than Nigerian (or from your ethnic group), please be more observant, listen to and protect your wife. Some do already, but much more do not. I have seen and heard so many things. It is some of the Nigerian woman who have hand in why some foreign wives choose to go back to their homeland instead of living in Nigerian; and sometime juju is involved (they will bragging and talking about it as if it‘s a good thing that they‘ve done). Even, the kids will be watching the dynamics and seeing what many Nigerian husbands do not see and how it is affecting their mother. This has a lot to do with those children from Nigerian and foreign women marriage unions deciding not to live or return to Nigeria more than not. There is a huge affect, as women are not suppose to be over-riding the men’s will for their own life. I do understand that some ethnic groups wish their group to continue and will force or try to force (through juju if necessary) their kids to marry from their own group. To each his or her own, but one should just be honest and not deceive innocent people if that is your choice. Please do not take this in a way other than what I mean. There many successful Nigerians everywhere, just like others from other ethnic groups or cultures. With my eyes I have also seen some Nigerians strung out on drugs, into one dirty business or another, in jail or on probation, saying they are married when they are not but have many kids all over, married but one sleeping around; married but both sleeping around; saying they are not married when they are and with kids, tried to runs levels on a foreign woman but she got wise and made they guy pay (no juju though), married and making babies with a foreign woman and abandoned them both. I have seen some Nigerian women use men to make a living…up to 4-5 men, collecting money from more than 5 plus men, using juju to take them away from their family and kids, using them to pay for their apartments, housing, expenses, etc., getting pregnant numerous times and aborting the pregnancies, being married and getting pregnant from another man and saying it’s the husband’s, destroying unsuspecting Nigerian men relationships and controlling them at the same time through manipulation and/or juju, being disrespectful to her husband, yelling and screaming and cursing her head off, etc. The list is an on-going one. But is this only with Nigerians? Capital No! All cultures have good and bad going on inside them…ALL CULTURES. We first need to check our own self and our motives/reasons for doing the things we do. Those we meet, yes we need to know about them and their culture, family, etc. but there should be no deceptions from the two involved; and all outsiders should be kept outside. The final decision to marry who one heart’s desire is that person’s decision and it should be made with truth and facts (selfish and jealous motives pushed aside). This is for the actual good of the persons involved. Who be akata? Just as many mentally free and sane African-Americans DO NOT accept nor use the N-word. Many mentally free and sane African-Americans who embrace their African heritage DO NOT accept nor use the word akata. Those who know better, take it just as it is…an insult. So, it is better one be correct…say African-American or find a word equivalent. Clearing up another misconception… it is an insult to call an African-American ‘oyibo‘. Our African ancestors did not willingly come to this country; nor did they willingly mix…many were raped. Thus, there are different skin tones or shades among African-Americans. It’s true that whites give lighter-skinned preference out of their own racist mental delusions but that’s a whole other issue. It is the whites who are bent, even to this day, on striving to keep African-Americans economically, institutionally and mentally enslaved. Those who have been or live in the US and have mingled with others other than Africans know the real. Do the whites have to succeed at what they want to do…capital NO! And they don’t with many…there are many African-Americans who do not fit the stereotypes at all but white America will still keep pumping out the stories of the mentally enslaved African-Americans. Whites have their own culture and blacks have their own culture too…there is a difference. Sorry…let me get back on point, which is NO ONE likes to be called or put into the group with the one who is oppressing them. Nor, do anyone like being called something they are not, even if they are from the same country. If someone is Igbo and another decides to call them Hausa…is that right? If someone is Yoruba and another decides to call him Hausa…is that right? This is what’s being done when one calls and African-American ‘white’ just because he/she is from the US. Black Americans heritage is still Africa, no matter what anyone thinks…and no one can ever change it. So, again it is better one be correct…say African-American or find a word equivalent. Poster...well done ooo! omg!! what a long thing lol.but managed to finish it tho!! great points,but why must you base most of your points on failed relationship on so called "juju" not everyone believe in it,neither do i believe a failed relationships on 'juju' as u put it.when people decide to mess up their lives in the beginning and later realized their mistakes when is too late, they then look for some kind of silly excuses, like looking for someone else to blame.if a man/woman decided on a relationship whether interracial relationship or same tribe.that person should be fully aware of what he/she is getting him/herself into and be ready to accept the responsibility and face the consequences as well........any body that called an African-American a 'white ' need to have his/her head examined. an African-American is a complete black and comes from a black race. so the difference is clear.great points overall!! The difference between GENIUS and STUPIDITY is that, genius has it limits..
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Quote from: laydeelaracraft on 10-09-2011 10:46 AM Quote from: ILOVEIT on 10-09-2011 12:26 AM Quote from: laydeelaracraft on 9-09-2011 11:41 AM @poster- pls dont b surprised. Some Nigerians resist change- infcat, some parents wont allow their kids to marry frm another tribe so it is hardly surprising for me. Most ppl rely on stereotypes wen dealing with groups of ppl without taking time to understand them. To give an example, my mom believes that if you are not Yoruba, Hausa (or Fulani), then you must be an Ibo-person (sbe includes Ppl frm Edo, Akwa Ibom or Calabar). Now for sumone like that cant take the time to find out about other cultures frm their country, how can u b openminded about other cultures? wow she really think edo,akwa ibom n calabars are igbo..quite interesting lol Akwa Ibom n not Ibo, they ask what is the diff? Thats a very extreme example but the point am trying to make is tht ppl dont always make an active effort to get to noe others. When we think about that pereption we have of certain ppl, tribes, race, religion or certain grp of ppl, we need to ask ourselves, where is this coming frm. 80% of the time we cant even remember the source of that stereotype. We need to treat ppl on an individual basis. Matter of fact, wen dealing with ppl we shud start afresh. Anyways dear- how far. How av u been? my dear i totally agree with you.people should be treated or judged individually not race or tribe.such negative perception and stereotype has been there for decades.we can only overcome it by the grace of God..i'm good my princess and you? been busy,been around for sometime tho! The difference between GENIUS and STUPIDITY is that, genius has it limits..
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Am coming back Reply
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Quote from: tayewo12 on 8-09-2011 06:33 AM Quote from: sobeit on 7-09-2011 03:32 PM Quote from: repnigeria on 7-09-2011 11:37 AM There are thousands of other people besides "akata." Gosh I hate that word it's so demeaning. Anyway, yes I can understand where you're coming from but there are other cultures which harbor the same moral and ethical standards that nigerians do as well. And not all American-born blacks fit into the negative stereotype that you claim. I personally am not attracted to "akata" or whatever but as people some of them are well-meaning individuals who are educated with high moral standards. On the other hand, nigerians tend to hail marriages are cream of the crop when in reality I've seen nigerian marriages that are in shambles. They hesitate showing it in public but you can tell they are absolutely MISERABLE. I actually know Nigerians who have gotten divorced yet so many of us act as if such a thing doesn't exist among us. The point I'm trying to drive across is that all the qualities we tend to think are only limited to Nigerians can be found in individuals from many other cultures. It's a thing of preference I agree but there's no need to disallow someone to marry who they please because it doesn't suit your desires. Nigerians definitely have a false sense of cultural or racial superiority and many of us act as if our sh*t don't stink. We're so quick to point out the flaws in others without looking at ourselves first and that is why I think Nigeria can be such a backward nation at times. As a people we still have a whole lot to work on in my honest opinion. you are blaming Hopea23 of being "stereotyping" while u are actually doing the same.u can see it from the highlighted words.the fact is that not everyone see it that way and besides interracial relationships/marriage faces prejudice and discrimination all over the world, no society or country is immune from it.As long as i'm concern there is absolutely no significant difference that distinguish one racial group from another.all racial group got it own uniqueness..it's all comes down to preference and what you want cuz interracial relationship isn't made for weaklings,narrow minded and shallow people, but for those that are strong enough to embrace and acknowledge the cultural differences. I agree with that. Someone's rat is someone's else pet and can be someone else's bush meat! exactly!!
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Quote from: repnigeria on 11-09-2011 11:56 PM @mchinwendu You are so right and you seriously took the words out of my mouth, I could not have said those statements any better. Thanks for taking the time to write such an in-depth post! Hopefully people will read it and become less subject to harsh racism and racial stereotyping. It's true what they say that there's only one race and that's the human race. God bless =] Sure, no problem...you picked a great topic. One race; the human race...very correct. God bless you too
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@ILOVEIT Replylol...yess, it's long ooo The poster addressed the issues in a good and straight-forward manner...I appreciate her and all she shared. I also shared that many relationships fail because some were laced with violence, unfaithfulness, deceit, others got pregnant from another man but said it’s the husband’s, racism and prejudices, outsider interferences, and family hostile interferences, etc. ...including juju. You're right, many other failed relationships don't involve juju at all. Unfortunately, my eyes have seen many that did which is why I moved in that direction. Thanks
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Quote from: kebella on 11-09-2011 03:24 PM odikwa terrible congrats HOPE IS MY ROAD,VICTORY IS MY DESTINY
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Quote from: mchinwendu on 12-09-2011 09:04 PM @ILOVEIT lol...yess, it's long ooo The poster addressed the issues in a good and straight-forward manner...I appreciate her and all she shared. I also shared that many relationships fail because some were laced with violence, unfaithfulness, deceit, others got pregnant from another man but said it’s the husband’s, racism and prejudices, outsider interferences, and family hostile interferences, etc. ...including juju. You're right, many other failed relationships don't involve juju at all. Unfortunately, my eyes have seen many that did which is why I moved in that direction. Thanks ok,heard you.well experience they said is the best teacher. haven't experienced so-called "juju" b4 and won't. The difference between GENIUS and STUPIDITY is that, genius has it limits..
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Love is where you found it, my point is, it's not good to be narrow minded or prejudiced, there's always a flip side to that coin, situation can be reversed and you find yourself on the recieving end of prejudice and bigotry, then you become the Gentile, the issue is not limited to inter racial alone, but inter tribal as well,perhaps another day we'll talk about it, any ways it's allways good to keep an open mind. Reply
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Love is where you found it, my point is, it's not good to be narrow minded or prejudiced, there's always a flip side to that coin, situation can be reversed and you find yourself on the recieving end of prejudice and bigotry, then you become the Gentile, the issue is not limited to inter racial alone, but inter tribal as well,perhaps another day we'll talk about it, any ways it's allways good to keep an open mind. Reply
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akata pple no get morals Reply
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Quote from: repnigeria on 7-09-2011 10:36 AM I've heard many different sides to this but no one is yet to give me a valid, logical explanation for it. Some individuals from other ethnic groups have this narrow-mindedness as well, especially many indians and people of asian and hispanic cultures. In my opinion, it all seems foolish. If someone is in love and has the financial, academic, and psychological maturity and security to do so, why stop them simply because their partner is not of the same racial or ethnic group? Wise words, I agree 100% with you... 
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