dis is so f.ucking stale @justmak

stop posting 16th century joke, we r in 20th century...

dir is dkkk Ooooo

abeg who see my dog ?

 

mmmer

yes, he lives beside my shrine...but na lie him dey lie, na only grinding he sabi do...book no knw , leaf e no sabi...

abeg who see my dog?

Hmmer

justmak, wait make I sharply finish a quikie before u start Ooo...


why I dey tell u sef, u get money to buy the available but expensive fuel?

stale, justmak is in d second year now with his new roommate (ossy) who is a fresher...

I didn't read it, can someone help with the summary?

na joke ?

justmak Don smoke wet donkey Shi.t

that's not a big deal...

Over the years, I’ve noticed that some couples have an easier time handling unexpected change than others. Some can make adjustments and go with the flow. Others can’t handle it when things change, when their expectations aren’t met, or when things happen that they “didn’t sign up for.

”They feel hurt, angry, and frustrated. Thoughts of divorce might even enter their mind. Maybe it’s because their spouse isn’t on the same page with them as they move through the situation. Or, maybe it’s because their spouse caused the situation.

Yes, there may be times when you’re justified for having these kinds of thoughts or feelings. And a few situations may be legitimate grounds for divorce.

But they are also grounds for give and take, a sense of adventure and humor, and even forgiveness and grace.
They are times to move closer together, not pull further apart.

Tips for Managing Changing Expectations in Your Relationship

So, how can we not just survive, but thrive through the unanticipated changes that come our way in relationship?

Realize that Change is to Be Expected, and Commit to Never Letting it Pull You Apart

You talked about changing expectations on your wedding day, remember?

When you promised to love, honor and cherish in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer! Tough situations can make or break a couple. Choose to let it make you stronger and better, together.

Agree to Disagree

Make the most of the things you can both agree on together, and graciously agree to disagree when needed. Disagreements don’t have to be final or fatal. My wife and I have changed our views on money several times in our marriage. Sometimes it has taken months or years for both of us to get 100% on the same page regarding a particular issue. Other times, God worked within one of us pretty quickly to change our thinking.

Keep it as Simple as Possible

Those who are debt-free and live a modest lifestyle can weather most any storm in their relationship better than those who have the stress of debt and stuff hanging over them too.

Good Communication is Key

Don’t shut down or keep your thoughts and fears to yourself. But don’t make a scene, start an argument, or pass blame either. Find a time – and a way – for both of you to share your thoughts and feelings in a positive manner.

Is funny how communication with your spouse might affect one’s finances. The returns are likely greater than just financial. A committed relationship to your spouse pays all sorts of dividends – companionship, support during health issues, a united family and more.

However, financial benefits are great too: Did you know that couples who argued regularly about finances were 30 percent more likely to get divorced. My suspicion is that ARGUING might have as much to do about communication skills as it does their finances. The sad thing is divorces devastate the finances not just of the mom but the dad and the kids too.

And lastly don’t be afraid to revisit an issue from time to time. For example, if we’ve agreed to disagree about an item, we commit to talking about it again a month or two down the road to see if it is still important to us at that time.


Note: Don’t be afraid to reach out and ask others for help or counsel. How have you handled changing expectations about money in your marriage?

You might have a look on the Relationship Chemistry Programme in the link below to have comprehensive detailed information on tackling your relationship Issues..

see as I dey look dem,  #certifiedMadPpl

passing with my bugati

Tags: relationship advice, making a commitment, saving your relationship.

Categories: Getting on Better with my Partner

Whenever I tell someone that they don't have to wait for their partner to commit to saving their relationship, I always get a quizzical look and sometimes downright scepticism: Doesn't it take two people to make a relationship work?

Let's be clear, in over five years, working as a marital therapist, I've yet to meet a couple where the responsibility for getting into a mess is not pretty evenly spread. Six of one and half a dozen of the other. So I have a lot of sympathy for people who're worried that this involves taking all the blame. It doesn't. Just taking responsibility for your half.

Instead of sitting around passively waiting or begging your partner to get with the programme, you can take control and break the deadlock. What's more, by changing your behaviour you will be changing the whole dynamic in your relationship. Instead of the current downward spiral – where one nasty action sparks another – you can set up a positive circle (where one kind one sparks another). In other words, you might start saving your marriage or relationship on your own but pretty soon, your partner will notice the difference, soften and become more open to change.

Here are five ways to move forward:

Look at your own contribution to the problem

It is much easier to complain about our partner's failings than look at our own. So step back and take a long look at what's been going on. When you cut away all the justifications, what do you regret doing?

Make a fulsome apology

I expect you've said 'sorry' many times before. Unfortunately, 'sorry' can become a knee-jerk reaction or a way of buying peace (even if you don't really mean it). A fulsome apology is different. It acknowledges both the unhelpful behaviour and the impact on the other person. For example: 'I wish to apologise that I haven't done more about around the house. It must have been exhausting for you and made you feel taken for granted.' Don't add an explanation (for example: 'I've had a lot of work on) as this sounds like justification and lessens the power of the fulsome apology.

Ask yourself what you would like to change?

Hopefully your fulsome apology will have drawn a line in the sand and maybe even sparked a matching one from your partner. Don't worry if your partner thinks you're just trying to sweet talk him or her or remains sceptical. Imagine for a second, your partner has said: 'Let's try again' or 'Let's work on our relationship'. What would do differently this time round? Instead of waiting for your partner, make those changes today. For example, listen more, help out more with the children or approach problems more calmly.

Challenge your interpretation of what's happening between you.

We imagine there is a straightforward link between events and feelings. Your partner does not text and you feel unloved.

However, it is more complex than that. Our reaction depends on our interpretation. For example, 'he didn't text because he doesn't care.' No wonder, you get upset. However, if the interpretation is 'he didn't text because his battery is flat.' The feelings might be irritation that he forgot to charge it. Equally, if your partner does not seem to have noticed your added efforts - challenge your interpretation. If it is 'she truly doesn't really love me' the response will be despair. If it 'she is worried that I might slip back into the old ways' then the reaction might be to redouble your efforts. If you're not certain why partner behaved in a particular way, ask him or her rather than making assumptions.

Control your panic

In my experience more relationships fail after a declaration of 'I love you but I'm not in love with you' or infidelity because of the panic of the partner on the receiving end rather than the person who has fallen out of love. So when you're feeling anxious, don't push for reassurance (as this only pushes your partner away) but go for a run, phone a friend or do some deep breathing exercises.

See Exracts from Dr Yemi's (PHD) latest book below


Dr Yemi is a marital therapist and the author of 'Relationships Chemistry' Top Certified Steps to achieving better cooperation and communication in relationship and marriage..

See this page for detailed information - www.wizardofdates.com/p/products-review.html

omomarty,  please I want to make a quick call to UK,  is ur service effective for that?