“Do you still love me?” “Do you want to break up?” “Do you want to get back together?” These questions and others like them are inquiries that should never be asked unless you are prepared to hear both answers.
By the time these questions are asked, the answer is never going to be good. Yet, I have counseled so many couples and continue to speak to people on a daily basis who ask these questions. The hope is that they are just being insecure and the answer will be the one they want. However, when the answer is not the one they are looking for, they exhibit behavior that is not very attractive and can be humiliating.
If you suspect that your partner does not love you anymore, is seeing someone else, or you are unsure if your ex wants to get back together and the uncertainty is driving you crazy, then, by all means, ask. Just make sure you are prepared for any answer. To not be prepared for the worst possible news is to be in denial. Denial can lead to wishing for something that you know is not going to happen.
A 34-year old woman, Bukola Abiwa, has been arrested by the police and arraigned before Ejigbo Magistrate’s Court, Lagos State, Southwest Nigeria, for allegedly attempting to kill herself and her fiance, Sunday Onayiga, with a knife. She is now in prison custody at Kirikiri, Lagos, for alleged murder.
She decided to kill herself and her fiancee after she was told by her fiance to pack out of their house at 3, Bassey Street, Orelope area of Egbeda, Lagos, where they have lived for over two years. The angry woman insisted that he must marry her because he promised to marry her two years ago.
The Ondo State-born woman expressed her frustration when Sunday broke the news to her that he was no longer interested in the marriage.
She reportedly hit his head on a wall and took a kitchen knife and pursued Sunday to the Police Station at Idimu to kill him.
The police arrested her and charged her to court for attempted murder and conduct likely to cause breach of public peace.
The embittered woman lamented at the open court that he has used her for two years and now wanted to dump her for another woman.
She is facing a two-count charge of assault and conduct likely to breach public peace. Narrating her ordeal, Sunday said he met her at Ikotun area and told her that he loved her and wanted to marry her.
He said before he met her, she was living on her own and he asked her to come and live with him and promised to meet her parents.
Bukola said that she started living with him as his wife not knowing he had another thing in his mind.
She said that she was shocked when Sunday told her that he no longer loved her and that the marriage had been cancelled.
Sunday told P.M.NEWS that he decided to quit because she was troublesome and could not manage her as wife. Bukola was later charged to court for the offence. She pleaded not guilty and the presiding Magistrate, Mrs. M. B. Folami granted her bail in the sum of N250, 000 with two sureties in like sum.
She was remanded in prison custody at Kirikiri, Lagos, because she could not meet her bail conditions.
Nollywood actress Monalisa Chinda may have finally decided to give love a second chance following a highly controversial divorce of ex-hubby Mr Segun Dejo Richards.
Barely a year and six months after Richards tied the knot with his lover based here in the United States, (Olayemi Omolade Olayinka), the actress was recently spotted with a guy at the Auto Lounge Nite Club, Victoria Island, Lagos-Nigeria at the birthday bash of fellow actress, Susan Peters. This caused some to insinuate that Mona, as she is fondly called, may have given a second thought to love.
Looking ravishingly beautiful, the actress who was in company of her friend, Emem Isong, was said to be fiddling with her Blackberry and smiling heartily.
While the gig lasted, Mona and the unidentified young man were seen laughing heartily. It has been almost three years since her marriage to Dejo crashed, and some feel it would just be nice if the young man is available to illuminate the actress’ heart again.
The Minister of Finance, Dr Ngozi Okonjo-Iweala, made the announcement at the flag-off of the Federal Government Community Service Scheme, held in Yola on Monday.
The project, which is under the Subsidy Reinvestment and Empowerment Programme (SURE-P), is part of the steps taken by President Goodluck Jonathan, to address the problem of youth unemployment.
“The programme is designed by President Goodluck Jonathan’s administration to create employment opportunities for up to 370, 000 women and youths yearly in the 37 states of the federation and the FCT, towards improving socio-economic infrastructure.
“To reduce the vulnerability of unskilled women and youths through exposure to income generating opportunities and to create good value systems in women and youths, through pre-engagement orientation sessions, ” Okonjo-Iweala said.
She explained that each state of the federation would benefit with about 10,000 jobs and every beneficiary would receive N10, 000 monthly.
Okonjo-Iweala, who expressed worries over the rate of unemployment in the country said that the country’s unemployment rate was still manageable, compared to some African and European countries.
“Youth unemployment is now a global problem as well as a big issue, but for us, we have to look carefully on how to tackle this problem. For example, in South Africa and Spain the rate of unemployment is now over 50 per cent each, while in Nigeria, the rate of unemployment is about 47 per cent,” she said.
She explained that the main objective of the programme was aimed at reducing the current level of unemployment and harnessing manpower towards national development aspirations.
She noted that the scheme had three components, including community services scheme, graduate internship scheme and vocational skills training scheme.
Speaking, Gov. Murtala Nyako, said that no fewer than 50,000 unemployed women and youths across the state were appointed Special Assistants to the governor, with each of them earning N10, 000 monthly.
“As part of my administration’s efforts to reduce the rate of poverty and unemployment in the state, 20 farming and skills acquisition centres were established in all the 21 Local Government Areas of the state.
“Three modern vocational and technical training centres were also established in the three senatorial zones of the state,” Nyako said.
Popular Nollywood actress, Tonto Dike made a surprise appearance in Ghana over the weekend and thrilled a section of Ghanaian music and movie fans with some Azonto dance moves while she showed off a rather large tattoo on her back.
She was not in town for her usual acting business. She came to co-emcee the much touted Stand Up GH concert by Imajin Advertising which brought in American stars Keri Hilson and Bow Wow. Before the show, organizers at a press conference stated that they were keeping the identities of the show’s emcees a secret to surprise the audience and the media.
However a few hours to the show, Tonto and Keri Hilson granted an interview on Yfm fm, where it became obvious that she was going to be on stage that night. According to feedbacks received on some social networking sites from those who witnessed the show, both Tonto and James added nothing to the event with the way they anchored the well publicised event.
She did not make too many appearances on stage as one may have thought. NEWS-ONE cameras recorded her twice on stage after she was introduced.
Despite the few appearances she made, Tonto managed to get the audience loving her when she tried to do the popular Azonto dance.It was quite obvious Tonto prepared for the Azonto and no wonder she impressed the audience. It was James Gardner, who started it all, when he coaxed the actress into doing the dance that has gone international. Tonto’s tattoo was however a subject of discussion among the show’s audience.
“It is a tattoo of herself; she must be really obsessed with whatever reason she got that big tattoo for,” somebody said from the audience.
Also, critics were not too happy with her makeup. Though they thought her outfit was to some extent awesome, her makeup was just too much.
“Tonto looks too fake with this make up. What kind of makeup is this? Oh please,” another fan said.
In the critics’ opinion, she has beautiful skin and could have done better with mild make up. Tonto in Nollywood is described as one of the most controversial actresses to ever grace the silver screens. She never gets out without controversy or scandal trailing her.
"My name is Sandra and I am from d eastern part this is my story. I was raped when I was 14 and it affected me so much that throughout my secondary education I never had any male friends and talking to a boy then was a problem.
It continue till I finished my secondary skool n luckily for me I gained admission into one of the university in the eastern part and there my problem continued again.
After 5yrs of my encounter, I fell in love wit this guy in same school with me same level bt different faculty, at first it was so beautiful loving him but at a point it went sour cause he started beating me whenever he is angry n at most times will force himself on me after beatings.
I would cry and say I will never forgive him atmost time I will call it quit but when he asks for forgiveness I will stupidly forgive him, most times I wonder if I am under a charm or what?. That's not where it stopped, I became pregnant, I told him and he said he is not ready to be a father that I shud abort it which I agreed.
I aborted it and it affected me academically cause I did it after my 1st semester yr 2 exams, I cried and ask God 2 forgive and told him that I don't want the relationship again and he pleaded with me that infact no more sex I agree and believed in him but it was all a lie cause right now I've done the 3rd abortion and yet still in love with him even afta ma pastor told me that I dont have a future with him and that he will destroy me and my future and leave me for another girl.
Please I need help cause I am running mad, this whole thing is affecting me badly both academically and emotionally.
"What should I do? Because some part of me still want to be with this guy but life and future is a stake - " Sandra.
“I sent my daughter to go and fetch water. When she did not come back on time, I sent her sister to fetch her. Her sister came back to inform me that an old man was making love to my daughter. So, I went there and saw things from myself.”
Mrs. Hadijat Saliu said while narrating how a 67-year-old man, Ahmed Atanda of Oke-Adi area of Ilorin, Kwara State, impregnated her 14-year-old daughter.
Atanda, a driver and divorcee father of two, allegedly lured the girl to an uncompleted building at a nearby well at Sango area and allegedly had carnal knowledge of her.
Mrs. Saliu said she was surprised when she caught the man live making love to her daughter (name withheld). She said when she could no longer bear it, she tapped the man on the shoulder, and he quickly jumped up. She added that a doctor had confirmed that her daughter is now pregnant.
The victim also acknowledged that Atanda had made love to her. But the accused, Ahmed Atanda denied having sex with the girl, alleging that he was being framed up.
Atanda said, “On that day, I was just passing by to collect cashew and dogonyaro leaves to treat myself. The girl said I should help her lift her bucket of water she fetched from the well. In the process, I heard one woman shout, ‘Everyone come oo! Come oh! He is molesting my daughter.
“I did not have canal knowledge of her because I had an operation near my private part and I cannot have segxwal intercourse now.”
The Division Police Officer, Kulende Police Station, Mr. Aminu Abdullahi, on Monday confirmed the incident. He added that the matter would be transferred to the state’s Criminal Investigation Department for further investigation.
Junaid Salisu - a resident of Lingyadi village near the site of today's attacks which suffered a similar fate last year at the hands of robbers - receiving treatment in May 2011 (File photo)
Twenty seven persons, including a policeman were killed by armed robbers in the early hours of Monday in Dangulbi Village in the Dansadau Emirate of Zamfara.
An eye-witness, Alhaji Lawalli Dangulbi, who spoke to newsmen at the Gusau Specialist Hospital, said there was pandemonium in the village when the robbers struck. He said the assailants shot sporadically, killing 18 persons instantly.
Alhaji Dangulbi is the chairmanship candidate of the All Nigeria Peoples Party for Maru Local Government Area in the Local Government Council polls coming up later this month.
He explained that the other dead bodies were discovered in neighbouring villages of Biya, Guru and Sabuwar Kasuwa.
The party stalwart said that he managed to carry eight wounded persons from the scene of the attack which, he said, was over 100 kilometres from the state capital, Gusau for treatment.
The Zamfara State Commissioner of Police, Mr Usman Gwary, was however, not available for comments.
The commissioner was said to have travelled to the scene of the crime with the state's Acting Gov. Alhaji Ibrahim Wakkala.
They went there to see things for themselves, sympathise with the people and attend the mass burial of the dead.
The Command’s Public Relations Officer, Mr Sanusi Amiru, confirmed the incident but refused to give further details.
The News Agency of Nigeria (NAN) learnt that the attack might be a reprisal attack for an earlier ambush on the criminals’ enclaves in the emirate by security operatives and vigilante groups.
The attackers were reported as not having taken anything from their victims during the attack.
NAN reports that Gov. Abdul'Aziz Yari made donation of operational vehicles with communications gadgets to security operatives in the state last month, bringing the number of such vehicles to 74.
The vehicles were donated in a bid to combat armed robbery and other criminal activities in the state.
Ending a relationship is never easy, even when you’ve truly had enough and you’re ready for freedom. Break up with others as you would like to be broken up with. Other than that, here are 6 of our best break-up methods.
1. Be honest
Whether he ends up believing you or not, being honest with whomever you’re breaking up with is the best way to go. Tell him why you need to move on and answer any questions he may throw at you as honestly as you can. Think about the times you were dumped with no reason. How did you feel? It probably frustrated you wondering why, when things appeared to be going so well, he decided to end it. Be fair and be honest with him.
2. Pick the right time
Some poor choices include at a party or any other social gathering, in the car or doing a mundane yet domestic task together such as grocery shopping. Chances are, he’ll be caught off guard no matter when you break the bad news, but if you do it in the frozen food section, he may have a much stronger reaction that if you do it at a café or in your neighborhood park. There is never going to be a perfect time to break up with someone, but try to have as much control over the time as you can, rather than blurting it out over brunch with friends.
3. Do it in a public place
This minimizes the chances for chaos. If you’re in a restaurant and there are people around, he will be less likely to fly off the handle and cause a scene. If you’re alone and he freaks out, you might be more likely to cave and call the whole thing off. Being in a public place may give you the confidence you need to follow through. Plus, when it’s over you can just walk away, rather than trying to get him to leave you place.
4. Do it in person
Do not be that person who ends a relationship electronically. Breaking up with someone via text, email or even over the phone is totally disrespectful. Even if you can’t wait to be rid of him, at least have the courage to look him in the eye as you dump him.
5. Make sure you are absolutely ready to do it
Not being totally sure of your feelings when you go to end a relationship can mess with your heart and his. If you’re not completely certain that it’s the right thing to do, you’ll confuse him and make him feel like he still has a chance, or worse, you’ll lose him when you still have feelings for him. Be totally ready to cut the ties or risk more heartache than necessary.
6. Take the high road
Chances are if he doesn’t see it coming, he won’t be happy with being dumped. He will curse at you, call you every name in the book, and make you feel like hauling off and punching him in the face. Restrain yourself. You’re leaving anyway, so just take a deep breath, nod politely and then walk away. You won’t gain anything by goading him on or giving him the satisfaction of knowing he upset you.
Only In Nigeria will people actually push an aeroplane. After pushing it in order to start, they will ask people to go in, knowing fully well that its faulty. But with the ego of getting money any way and in any form, they won't think rightly.
Then when it crashes they will declare countless days of their so called mourning. May GOD help this nation. Tell me why it won't crash. Mstchewwwww.
I was once told that praying for this Country is a waste of time, instead pray for yourself and when your prayers are answered. Then think of how you will help this nation. Is this true?
That was the first time it began to dawn on observers that actresses who have paid their dues are actually getting paid. As you read this omotolas take home fee is no longer N1.7M, the actress now collects N5M(five million naira per script)to be involved in any movie.
According to observers "she has even turned down scripts worth N3M and recently turned down a script worth N2.5M and ireti doyle got the role. "Omotola got paid N5M for her role in movie 'amina' by producer tarila thompson whilst she go N4.5M for her role in ties that bind after a series of negotiations.
Lets say she collects four scripts in two months,that's a solid 20million keh!
Abeg maybe i should dump writing for a waka pass role eeeeeh.
At least 20 Nigerians were this morning deported from the United Kingdom and were dropped off at the Murtala Muhammed international airport in Lagos, Nigeria.
They left the United Kingdom at about 2 a.m. today on a chartered flight along with Africans from other countries, Mr. Morrison Robinson, one of the deportees, said.
He said almost all the deportees had overstayed in the United Kingdom beyond the time permitted by their entry visas and were detained before being deported on-board a chartered Italian plane.
“We were many. They are still going to Congo and other African countries,” Robinson said, looking at his two bags and expecting a relative to take him home.
A Lebanese, Hassaini Habi working with a construction company Hajaig Construction has been crushed to death with his married Nigerian lover, Mrs. Josephine Agav by a backup vehicle owned by the Power Holding Company of Nigeria, PHCN,
The incident happened at NNPC depot, Apir, Makurdi, the Benue state capital, northcentral Nigeria. Habi was said to have been going out with the 23-year student of Community Secondary School, Apir and a mother of two for quite sometime despite warnings from her husband, Mr. Christopher Agav.
Investigation revealed that on the fateful day, the randy Lebanese had planned to take his lover out as usual and in the process of negotiating a U-turn at the NNPC depot, a PHCN Toyota Hilux van crushed his car and he died on the spot while Josephine passed on later at the Federal Medical Centre, Apir.
Meanwhile, PHCN have since supported the family in burying their wife while Hajaig insisted that they had nothing to do with her death.
“As soon it happened, PHCN gave us N150,000 as assistance to bury Josephine but Hajaig said they were not concerned with the death. Claims that Josephine or her friend owed Habi N100,000. 00 is completely false,” Mr. Fidelis Agav, the eldest man in the family said.
A bomb blast has been reported at the entrance of the headquarters of the Borno State Police Command in Maiduguri. The suicide bomber drove a car to the gate of the police command opposite Government Secondary School along Damaturu Road in Maduguri and detonated a bomb.
Four policemen at the gate of the command headquarters as well as the suicide bomber were killed instantly.
A Florida mom who was found guilty of strangling her daughter with a bra has been sentenced to life in prison. After a little more than two hours of deliberations, a jury found Nioshka Bello, 24, guilty of first-degree murder Wednesday, the Orlando Sentinel reported.
A judge sentenced Bello, who has a history of mental illness going back to when she was 15, immediately afterwards. Bello confessed to killing her 2-year-old daughter, Janessa Sandoval, shortly after the child’s death in September 2009, the newspaper reported. She then spent several months in a state mental hospital after she was found incompetent to stand trial. After reviewing medical reports, a judge ruled last year that Bello was well enough to appear in court.
Prosecution records say the troubled mom was out of work, broke, and about to lose the apartment where she was staying the day she strangled her daughter with a bra and her bare hands, according to the Orlando Sentinel. She argued with Janessa’s father on the phone, begging him for financial help, but he hung up on her, saying he was with someone new.
Prosecutors said that Bello tried unsuccessfully to commit suicide before deciding to kill the girl in the bedroom that she and her daughter shared, local TV station News 13 reported.
TO people in Prison: Beware KOLO-MENTAL AS ENTER THE PLACE!
The collapse of the 50-year-old Abakpa-Nike Bridge in Enugu State capital Wednesday night following an intense rainfall Thursday caused heavy traffic build up in the city, cutting off close to one million residents of the city.
Residents of the densely populated Abakpa-Nike who passed through the bridge late Wednesday evening woke up Thursday morning to discover to their that the bridge had collapsed, cutting them off from other parts of the city. Although no life was lost in the disaster, it, however, caused a major traffic problem for motorists plying Abakpa-Nike, Emene and Trans-Ekulu axis Thursday as most residents of the area were forced to return home, while some trekked to their places of work, market and school.
Rosemary Obika, who leaves close to the bridge, said that at about 7.00 pm that night, they heard a loud noise and before they could get there, the bridge had already gone down.
“People scampered for safety as motorists and other road users were diverted to Penoks area to avoid the collapsed bridge," she said. "As this was going on, another section of the bridge also collapsed and it completely cut off the road. There was great confusion.”
On Thursday, Enugu State Government deployed Arab Contractors, a construction company in the state, to the location, while the bridge was barricaded as security men kept vigil at the place.
A woman prison officer who swapped sexy letters and phone calls with three inmates was jailed for 12 months today. Zanib Khan, 27, had ‘illicit relationships’ with two drug dealers incarcerated at HMP Brixton and a third prisoner at Ford open prison in Sussex.
Zanib Khan shared nearly ten hours of intimate calls with the men on a secret phone she hid from her prison bosses and her personal phone.
Police also found segxwally explicit love letters from prisoners at her home she smuggled out of jail stuffed inside her uniform.
Ms. Zanib Khan had relationships with Timothy Iyegbe, Daryl Smith and Jason Graham, between March and November 2011.
Police believe she was close to four other prisoners over three years.
Ms. Khan, who joined the prison service to pay for a law qualification, also covered up the fact her father and her boyfriend were both serving prisoners when she took up her post.
Judge David Higgins today jailed Khan for 12 months for what he described as ‘deplorable and deeply antisocial behaviour’.
He said: ‘The period of offending is approximately eight months between March and November 2011. ‘Inevitably that means you embarked on a knowing, sustained, voluntary, and indeed gross breach of trust. It is the very denial of that which you are employed to do. Your behaviour was both deplorable and deeply antisocial and the public will be rightly shocked by that behaviour by someone in your position. It certainly diminishes confidence in the prison service.’
The court heard Zanib Khan began work at HMP Feltham in 2009 before moving to HMP Brixton, in south west London. She had been the subject of internal disciplinary proceedings prior to the discovery of the raunchy texts and letters after it was discovered she had been visiting her father and boyfriend Wahid Khalique in jail.
Ms. Zanib Khan was arrested on January 26, 2012, and officers found the box for the illicit phone in her bedroom. In interview she denied any involvement with the three men and attempted to frame her younger sister Zahira.
Daughters of Jezebel! She wants to fabricate lies against her own blood sister...
I. WOMEN PRETEND PASS CHAMELEON 2. WOMEN NO GET MONEY 3. MOST WOMEN OF UNA LOVE NA FAKE 4. WOMAN GET LONG THROAT 5. ACCORDING TO RESEARCH NA WOMEN PLENTY PASS FOR HELL FIRE
SATAN USE WOMEN FOR EVIL MORE THAN MEN. (E.G WITCHES and may more)
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