Girl replies, "You will have 2 rinse out your mouth and wash off your face!"
3) Prostitute: no hair grows on my honeypot...
-->Doc: did you ever see grass grow on a busy high way?
3) A man goes hunting with a bunch of his friends on His land!! They have been hunting a while and his best friend says"hey I can see in your bedroom with my scope". He says " who's that man in the bedroom with your wife? The husband says "what? r u joking? The friend replies,"no honestly. I can see them!! The husband says "Fine shoot her in the head and him in the private!! The friend replies"I CAN GET THAT IN ONE SHOT!!!!!!!!
4) There are two brothers, sharing a bunk bed
Big brother says, "me and my girl friend are makin sandwiches". The little brother hears the girlfriend laughing
Little brother says, "stop u r pouring mayonnaise in my mouth".
5)A blind man walks into a dinner and sits down at a booth. The Waiter walks up to his table.
"What can I get you today?" says the Waiter.
"I have a kind of strange request." says the blind man.
"What’s that?" says the Waiter.
"Can I have the unwashed fork of the person you waited on before me?" says the blind man.
The waiter thinks for a minute.
"Um ok" says the waiter.
The Waiter brings the blind man the fork and the blind man slips it into his mouth. He sucks on it for a short time.
"The meat loaf and mash potatoes are delicious I’ll have that" says the blind man.
The waiter is grossed out but also impressed he was right about the dish. The blind man eats tips very well and leaves. The blind man comes back the next two days in a row with the same request and both times he was correct about the dish of the person before him. The next day when he arrives the Waiter notices him walking in.
"Jenny, Jenny" the Waiter says flagging down a Waitress he works with.
"This time I wanna have some fun with this fun. Here put this into your panties." He says as he hands Jenny a fork. Jenny giggles and does as he asked. He walks but to the table with the fork in hand ready for the blind mans daily request. The blind man as always asks for the fork of the person waited on before him. The Waiter hands him the fork fighting his laughter. The blind man pops in into his mouth.
"hmmmmm." says the blind man sucking the fork for a short time
"I had no idea Jenny works here!"
6) A construction worker is working on the 3rd floor of a building under construction. He turns to grab the saw and notices it’s gone. After searching a while he notices the saw on the first floor on a table. There is another worker close by on the 1st floor standing around.
The man on the 3rd floor yells "Hey can you bring me the saw?!"
The man on the 1st floor places his hand by his head to listen closer.
The man on the 3rd yells "The saw!"
The man on the first floor shakes his head.
The man on the 3rd floor starts to signal "I need" and he points at his knee. "The hand saw" and he moves his arm back in forth in a sawing motion.
The man on the 1st floor quickly wips down his pants and begins masturbating.
The man on the 3rd floor is shocked! He runs all the way down the stairs to the first floor.
"What the hell are you doing?! I said I need the hand saw!"
"I know I was just trying to tell you I’m cumming."
post your sex jokes here
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