Men, Why Empathy in Relationships Matters and How you Can Step it Up

Date: 25-09-2012 4:23 pm (12 years ago) | Author: uduak Sophia Monday
- at 25-09-2012 04:23 PM (12 years ago)
(f)
Most of us have known that empathy is a cornerstone of a healthy, connected relationship.  However, men and women actually want different emotional payoffs from each other. and we (not all) also know that, men like to know when their partners are happy while women want the man in their life to know when they are upset. It could be that for women, seeing that their male partner is upset reflects some degree of the man’s investment and emotional engagement in the relationship, even during difficult times. This is consistent with what is known about the dissatisfaction women often experience when their male partner becomes emotionally withdrawn and disengaged in response to conflict.

Empathy doesn’t come naturally for everyone and there are many reasons for this including attachment trauma and other challenging family of origin experiences where you weren’t modeled empathy.  Men are often not socialized to be empathic to the degree that women are.  The bottom line is that if empathy is a struggle it can be practiced, learned and integrated into your relationships.  If trauma is part of your story, you may need to begin with empathy for yourself before you can demonstrate it outwardly.

What is empathy?  Empathy is the ability to recognize another person’s beliefs and emotions; to not only put yourself in another person’s shoes but respond to their needs. So men, we’re looking for behaviors that demonstrate empathy to your partners so they feel your emotional engagement.  Let’s look at some of the ways you can do this:

1. Follow up and ask her about something that was bothering her.
2. Ask her about her day.  Listen for the emotional content under the facts and dig deeper with her.
3. During an argument listen without interruption and validate her feelings.
4. Recognize that she is separate from you and is justified to have separate feelings and desires.
5. Refrain from always having to be right.
6. Let her see you practicing empathy in other areas of your life.

The presence or lack of empathy shapes all of us from our earliest attachment relationships with our parents or primary givers.  It’s an important skill to hone in all of your relationships.  Men or women can struggle with empathy.  It’s also important to note that the the more men and women try to be empathetic to their partner’s feelings, the happier they are. Cheesy Cool


Posted: at 25-09-2012 04:23 PM (12 years ago) | Addicted Hero
- xena15 at 25-09-2012 04:31 PM (12 years ago)
(f)
Gbogboski has spoken!
Noted.

Posted: at 25-09-2012 04:31 PM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
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- winace at 25-09-2012 04:57 PM (12 years ago)
(f)
I dey u Sophie . Thanks for dis post.
Posted: at 25-09-2012 04:57 PM (12 years ago) | Addicted Hero
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- sophiebaby at 26-09-2012 09:13 AM (12 years ago)
(f)
Quote from: xena15 on 25-09-2012 04:31 PM
Gbogboski has spoken!
Noted.

 Grin Grin Grin Grin U NO DEY EVR FORGET D NAME BABE.  Cool

Posted: at 26-09-2012 09:13 AM (12 years ago) | Addicted Hero
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- sophiebaby at 26-09-2012 09:15 AM (12 years ago)
(f)
Quote from: winace on 25-09-2012 04:57 PM
I dey u Sophie . Thanks for dis post.

 Cool Cool Cool Kiss

Posted: at 26-09-2012 09:15 AM (12 years ago) | Addicted Hero
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- Treasure2 at 26-09-2012 09:52 AM (12 years ago)
(f)
Learning
Posted: at 26-09-2012 09:52 AM (12 years ago) | Hero
Reply
- micc at 26-09-2012 12:34 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
ok o
Posted: at 26-09-2012 12:34 PM (12 years ago) | Hero
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- sophiebaby at 26-09-2012 01:55 PM (12 years ago)
(f)
 Roll Eyes

Posted: at 26-09-2012 01:55 PM (12 years ago) | Addicted Hero
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- dlimelite at 26-09-2012 06:57 PM (12 years ago)
(f)
Good one  Grin
Posted: at 26-09-2012 06:57 PM (12 years ago) | Hero
Reply
- sophiebaby at 27-09-2012 10:33 AM (12 years ago)
(f)
 Kiss

Posted: at 27-09-2012 10:33 AM (12 years ago) | Addicted Hero
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