Verbal manipulative conversation should not be used at home.
Below are a few examples of verbally
manipulative conversations:
* You spend the
day cleaning the
house.
Baseboards are
scrubbed, the
kitchen is spotless
and you are
feeling good
about all you’ve
accomplished.
Your husband
comes in from
work and says,
“good job, too
bad you didn’t use
more wax on the
floor.”
What is he saying
with this
statement? He is
complimenting
you and at the
same time
dismissing your
hard work. You
have become his
servant; a person
whose job it is to
meet what he
feels is appropriate as far as cleaning the
house.
If your spouse makes statements that
cause you
to want to defend yourself…explain why
you
didn’t use more wax, you are being
verbally
manipulated.
* You have an important work related
social
event that you want to attend. Your wife
doesn’t
feel she needs to make an appearance. To
justify
her lack of interest in accompanying you
she
says, “if you loved me you wouldn't make
me
go.”
What is her objective with this statement?
To
cause you to feel guilt. If you were a good
husband, you would put your needs aside
in
favor of her needs. You love your spouse;
you go
out of your way to show how much you
love
your spouse. What better way to
manipulate you
than for your spouse to question your love
for
her?
* Money is tight, your wife doesn’t work
outside
the home and you have full responsibility
for
paying the bills. Your wife books an
expensive
vacation on a cruise ship. What is her
response
when you become upset with her for
spending
money you don’t have?
“I did it for us. You’ve been so stressed
over work
and we haven’t spent time alone in a long
time. I
thought it would be nice for us to get away
for a
romantic vacation.” Don’t fall for it! She is
nothing more than a snake-oil salesman.
She is
bent and determined to get what she
wants at
the appearance of giving you something
you
need. Truth be told, she isn’t the least bit
concerned about you and your level of
stress.
* Then there is the overt verbal
manipulator. He/
she doesn’t know when to take “no” for an
answer. This person wants something and
is hell
bent on getting it. Even after you say “no”
he/
she will come back at you from a new
angle. The
objective? To wear you down until you say
what
he/she wants to hear…”yes.”
Most of us are socially conditioned to be
nice.
The verbal manipulator knows this and will
play
on your desire to be nice…to meet their
needs.
Most of us also respond to comments
made by
others, especially if we are married to that
person. To protect yourself, your best
response
to the verbal manipulator is no response at
all. If
he thinks you should have used more wax,
who
cares. Don’t defend your choices. If she
spends
money you don’t have, tell her to get a
refund
for those cruise tickets and refuse to
discuss the
matter further.
I don’t normally suggest spouses give each
other
the silent treatment but when dealing with
the
verbal manipulator, silence is a powerful
tool.
| Posted: at | |
TRENDING GISTS 
AMVCA 2025: Seven Doors & Lisabi: The Uprising Light Up Nollywood’s Biggest Night (Full Winners)
Kidnap Ring Busted In Anambra: Four Arrested In Daring Night Raid
Ex-AUN Provost, Professor Yusuf Attahir Baba Loses Three Children in Devastating Car Crash
Football Star, Lionel Messi-Marriage Rumours Stir Online Frenzy As Divorce Speculations Grow
El-Rufai & Peter Obi Meet at Cambridge Conference, Sparking Political Speculation Ahead Of 2027 Elections
"How My Mother’s Lover Rap3d Me" — 12 Year Old Victim Narrates Ordeal