that she wasn't aware of the changes she would notice from
now on but yet she hated being on her 'period' for the first
few months in the beginning. Playing football and riding
bicycles had suddenly become difficult during those 5 days.
She never thought she would ever love but everytime she
did, she was only rejected. It was obvious, who would date
a 14 year old flat chested girl? There was nothing more that
she wanted than to look pretty and attractive. As she grew
older, so did her desire to become attractive. In the advent of
computers, she was exposed to porn, google and sex and
the city. She had decided that one day she will become
Samantha (the 'Sex and the city' character who was hot,
attractive and horney all the time)
Lucy didn't care about her size and started to read more
about sex and started watching porn everyday. She had
learned alot. The only fear the then 15 year old had, was
becoming pregnant (every girl's nightmare). She kept herself
from experimenting with men who she didn't trust. It was a
sensible decision (unlike Samantha). She waited, screened
men and started hooking up. With every man, the
experience was different and she learned and opened up to
new possibilities.
At the age of 17, she had achieved her goal. She was another
Samantha (with principles). She never did two guys in a day
or a week. She did strangers but never looked back at them.
She never waited for breakfast and never gave any guy false
hope. She liked beasty men coz gentle ones would make her
fall for them. A friend was never a toy and never a lover. She
had learned how to detach emotion from sex. To such an
extent that she had stopped feeling any emotions.
Her relationships were nothing but a disguise. She was weak
inside, afraid to love or to be loved. Afraid of losing control.
Sex had become the only reason she would sleep next to a
Man. There was no hope for love. Love was painful and
stressful for her. She had constructed a stronger Woman
but a weaker lover. She treated men the way they treat
women- like objects. Becoming so blind that she had started
hurting the gentle guys. She could not limit her extremes and
soon realised that she felt like a robot, a rock, a thing. She
always said ' A woman can do anything a man can do' and
that woman had proved it.
It was true that every guy wanted to make love to her. She
could control men like no other woman could have. While
men enjoyed her company, women questioned her ways-
often calling her a slut. They couldn't figure out how an
average looking woman was able to control men that easily.
But it wasn't her body, it wasn't her face, it was HER. The
person she was, the conviction in her eyes and her mystified
words distinguished her from other women. She was bold,
direct and blunt. Dominating as Hitler and caring as Teresa.
She wasn't a women with ordinary patterns. But she sure
was a woman of her words..
She could make a man do anything. Yes, absolutely
Anything! No woman could be her and she could not be
anyone but SAMANTHA.
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