Courtship Tips

Courtship is not only a pre-marital stage in a relationship but the foundation.This important stage and step to marriage is usually misconstrued,abused and wasted thereby setting the stage for crisis in marriages.This is not to say that courtship has all the panacea to marital problems and failure,but it sure would confer some measure of stability in marriages if the following tips are taken seriously.

Open Mindedness,No Pretence.
Human mind is deceitful and desperately wicked and the great play-wright,Williams Shakespeare observed in one of his works that "there is no art of knowing the true construction of the mind from the face".This underscores the complexity and dynamics of human behaviours such that it is impossible to conclude or say with an air of finality that we know the people close to us inside out.This has also made it difficult for people in relationship to know if their partners are open or pretentious.Importantly,openness is  vital if courtship and by extension,marriage is to be successful as whatever character,information or secret concealed during courtship is carried over to marriage; and sometimes becomes the albatross of the marriage.

Avoid Pre-marital Sex.
Alot of people may find this very difficult to understand let alone aplying it during their courtship.Sex is not a sign of love but a response to emotion which is usually shortlived.It could better be described as infatuation because relationship lasts a lifetime with or without sex.Sex makes it difficult for people to see the real personality behind the facade of beauty that their partners are wrapped in.Sex destroys courtship morethan it protects or sustains.A man or woman that has no uterior motives cannot walk out of courtship on account of sex denial as there are more important and serious issues to learn and know about eachother order than sex.If anything,sex only beclouds your sense of reasoning and judgement while courting.

Carry Out Background Checks on Your Partner
This is very important.Take positive steps to know who you are courting,his family,job,friends,history and every piece of information that is necessary.Even if you have to go extra mile,do because it is worth the headache and failure to do so during courtship is like postponing the evil day.You have to know and be well acquainted with eachother for the purpose of compatibility.

Do Not Co-habit
It is very wrong for people to cohabit during courtship.Until marriage is fully consumated,a man and a woman have no justification whatsoever living together.The two cannot stand on the same plank and should not be approached with same mindset because no matter the length of courtship,it cannot be seen as marriage until the needful is done-marriage.

Avoid Discussing Your Courtship with Friends.
This is one of the problems that has destroyed many courtship and relationships.People discuss their relationship to their own peril.When you complain or boast about your relationship to your friends,you either attract gossip or evil from them which will open floodgate of unsolicited and unwarranted development in the relationship.If you must complain especially,then let it be to the right persons,may be your spiritual leader,parents or mentor.

Don't Show Off
Courtship is not a context,therefore do not try playing to the gallery by ego boasting or showing off in order to impress your partner.Boasting either goes with lies or pride.You might end up telling your partner what or who you are not and this might cast doubt on your credibility thereby calling to qestion your intentions.Be yourself.

Shun Desperation.
Avoid it must be him/her or no one else because your life can still go without such person.Oh I have suffered in this relationship therefore I must see the end of it all.Really! Marriage is not by sympathy and do not marry anybody out of sympathy or any other consideration if not for love.Do not in your courtship overlook what you cannot condone in your marriage.

Above All,Pray
There is no limit to what prayers can do for those who believe.Courtship is actually a time to pray for the anticipated union because marriage is made in heaven.

Posted: at 27-07-2011 10:57 AM (12 years ago) | Upcoming

i laughed at the "ABOVE ALL PRAY" HAHAHA. Well i'm not a guy but i think i might show this to my brother. LMAO!

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Posted: at 29-07-2012 04:33 PM (11 years ago) | Upcoming

"Do Not Co-habit " - true! this is because this would mean that you are already committed to each other and that you assume responsibilities of husband and wife which you both may not be ready for.




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Posted: at 3-08-2012 10:06 AM (11 years ago) | Newbie

true talk highly impartve

Posted: at 2-09-2015 09:35 PM (8 years ago) | Upcoming