We have played 5 league games this season. Congratulations on the 7 points accumulated so far – abysmal by our standards, but you are coming from Everton, so we’ll let it slide – for now. It must be said that expectations for your initial weeks were quite low. Being with the fixture list and all (which you keep whining about); you have done a fair job. That’s one way to look at it.
Another way of looking at this bullshit is your often perplexing team selections. Please explain to this honoured assembly why you insist on playing that God-forsaken, knock-kneed modafoka Ashley Young? That has not made a decent cross since James Ibori was stealing the poo out of Delta State. The last time he actually dribbled anyone was before the coming of Christ! That dark-skinned nigga is only suited for holding Van Persie’s kit during games, for Christ’s sakes! Drop that fool and give Adnan Januzaj a run of games! That boy is a breath of fresh air and looks like a far better player than that Young. What is Antonio Valencia doing on that right wing? Nigger’s so one-legged, even Khalid Boulahrouz can mark him out of a game in his sleep. Turn that nigga into a right back and get a decent winger to run riot there and feed RVP and Rooney for the love of Alomo Bitters!
Ehen, why are you even playing Chris Smalling? Yes, his grass to grace story is inspiring, but isn’t it obvious to you that the guy plays with half a brain? – The other half of that brain is with Phil Jones. The damn boy can’t cross for poo. He can’t tackle to save his life, and his marking is jerkier than a two year old playing FIFA 2014! Then there is Evra. Look, Jesus Navas used him for training. I know you have a thing against players with tattoos, but Buttner has actually played well for Manchester United. Fabio as well, or is it Rafael. Play these boys.
You might not know a lot about Nigeria, although you managed Joseph Yobo and that fat-Bottom Yakubu Aiyegbeni. You might want to call them and ask what jazz means, because I swear to God I will jazz the poo out of you and your family if you play that imbecilic Danny Welbeck one more time. I don’t know if you have a dark-skin quota to fill in the team so you put Young, Welbeck and Valencia but you need to stop fielding that mandingo-looking nigga and start putting Chicharito or Kagawa instead! Welbeck is easily the worst player in that team and everyone unanimously agrees on that score except your good self!
Mr Moyes, I don’t dodge my girlfriend and pay N100 to watch United games in Wasiu’s viewing center down the road every weekend to be watching the kind of rubbish you are presiding over. You need to sort this poo out, and fast. We were tolerant of Baba because he won us a raft of titles in his days. That privilege hasn’t been extended to you yet.
CLICK HERE FOR THE LATEST HOT SCANDAL GISTS
CLICK HERE FOR MORE FUNNY OPEN LETTERS
| Posted: at | |
kison
TRENDING GISTS 
Abuja Court Fails To Hear EFCC Suit Against Order Restraining Yahaya Bello’s Arrest
OAP Do2dtun Reacts To Viral Bullying Videos, Calls Out Secondary School Bullies
Wives Of Osun State Gov Adeleke Battle For Position Of 1st Lady As Nigeria's 1st Lady Visits
Police Deploy Officers to Investigate Bullying at Leads British International School
NAFDAC Uncover Illegal Activities Of Fake Cosmetics Producer In Lagos