1. Wait for everyone to be served
What if they are also waiting for you to be served as well? You'll die of hunger looking at each other before anyone has the brass neck to be first. Always keep a snack handy just in case you find yourself in this uncomfortable situation.2. Keep your things off the table
Go the whole way and get rid of the plates and cutlery as well. This will save even more space for food on the table. Just use your fingers to eat.3. Don't text at the table
That's just rude. If someone has a cellphone at the table, pick it up and drop it in their soup. Teach them a lesson in good manners. 4. If you prefer not to have wine while dining out, don't turn your glass upside down
Smash your glass on the floor so there an be no confusion you not a secret drunkard like the rest of them.5. Practice good speakerphone manners
See answer 3.6. Whoever arrives at a door first holds it for the next person
Last one to sit down is a sissy, and pays the bill.7. Don't microwave stinky foods in the shared lunchroom.
Tell the other guests, you are sorry they won't be getting dinner because it stinks, and you read somewhere it's bad etiquette to microwave stinky food. They'll just have to go hungry because you don't want to be thought of, as a bad host. If fact, tell them to get out and buy their own dinner, so you can heat the food up with a clear conscience. 8. At the airport, don't crowd the boarding area
Let the other passengers push in front of you and get the best seats. Then feel like an idiot all way to your destination because the only seat left on the plane by the time you got on, is the toilet seat.9. Let people off the elevator and hold the doors for others before you board.
Miss your floor, and spend the next four hours going up and down in the elevator until you pluck up the courage to get off on the floor you want. Then spend another four hours, holding doors open for your ungrateful work colleges. Arrive at your desk just in time for the boss to sack you for being eight hours late.10. If all you have to say in your e-mail reply is "Thanks!" refrain from sending it.
Unless you are e-mailing your ex boss to say "Thanks" for sacking you, because you hated him and your boring job. In fact. Send him a "Thanks" e-mail everyday for the rest of his life just so he gets the message.11. Keep your cell phone out of the conversation
Especially if you are in a cell phone store, complaining that your brand new cell phone doesn't work. Enjoy the confusion on the sales assistants face when you are trying to tell him his phone is crap, without bringing the cell phone into the conversation because that is considered rude.12. Be polite in e-mail
Unless it's to scammers or spamers. They deserve everything they get. And don't forget that ex boss of yours. Feel free to give him/her a large piece of your mind. In LARGE RED TEXT if you feel like it.13. Respect the text
Simply miss that all important meeting and possible promotion, by not sending a txt out side of office hours to confirm when and where it is taking place. | Posted: at 17-01-2013 06:23 PM (12 years ago) | Newbie |
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