What is dangerousness?
Dangerousness means any man who causes damage to his partner’s emotional, financial, segxwal and physical life. Dangerous men are not different from other men that walk on the street. They live in the same house that other people live, eat what you and I eat, sleep like you and I do and play like any other person. Really it is not easy spotting them.
The Permanent Clinger
He is a type of man that wants to be the center of your world. He is very sensitive emotionally thus women are attracted to him because women are but uses it as an avenue to cage his victim.
His nature.
Can’t stand to be without you
Pleads begs, cries when you threaten 2 quit
Threatens to hurt himself if you ever leave
Blames you for his neediness
Wants constant assurance about his desirability
Has very few if any outside interests
Has very few close friends
Has had multiple unsuccessful relationships
May have an unusual relationship with his mother
Produces a feeling of suffocation in you when you spend prolonged time with him
Your Defence
Do u want a man that will choke u all Ur life?
He will try to be closer often displaying a needy attitude, he is not out for you rather hes out 2 meet his needy desire through you.
So do u want 2 be used?
The Parental Seeker
He acts like a baby. He sees you as his mother, who is suppose to feed, care and do everything for him
His nature
He wants constant reassurance from you
Wants to be waited on and refuse to do basic things by himself
Doesn’t help with adult chores
Expect special treatment because he is needy
Wants you to make decisions for his life
He is childlike in his emotional needs
He underachieves as a way of avoiding responsibility
Has a history of been rescued or kept or sheltered in relationships
Wants to be told what to do and needs direction to get anything done
Appears to need a mentor in all areas of his life
Your Defence
Ask yourself what the motivating factor is in you going into relationship with a man-child.
Do you find his dependency or vulnerability attractive? Answering this question sincerely will assist you protecting yourself from getting involved with such man
The Emotionally Unavailable Man.
His emotions are somewhere. He is not a good husband material. His emotions may be directed to work, education, career, achievement, recognition, hobbies. E.t.c
It may even be that he is married or in a relationship at the same time dating someone else, although he may come around occasionally.
His nature
Has hobbies, sports, work, educational goals, friends or some combination of these that always comes ahead of the relationship
He is pre-occupied with his career to the extent that long term dating, engagement or marriage is never considered an option
Does not seem to be bothered by the ending of a relationship.
Promises to end his relationship with someone else, but “reasons” keep coming up as to why he can’t
Doesn’t take time between the ending of one relationship and the beginning of another one
Has a history of affairs
He may be an addict
Your Defence
Does he spend quality time with you?
Because is attention is somewhere else, he hardly focus on your relationship.
Notice his response when you suggest ending the relationship, in most cases he will not bother, he will not want to know why, simply because he has other things drawing his attention outside.
Man with a Hidden Life
He is a type pf man that does not allow you to know him. He ensures that detail aspects of his life are properly hidden from you. He is the type of man that does his things in a solo manner, you can hardly tell where he is going or where he is coming from. Everything about him is hidden and secret.
His nature
Will not answer direct questions about where he goes, what he does, or who he is with
Conceals important information about himself that you only discover later
Goes by Aliases
Engages in secret behaviours
Is often unable to be reached directly, he has no address
Resist disclosing personal information about himself, such as were he was raised, who he is related to, or where he went to school.
Receives mysterious phone calls or sms letters and he also has mysterious appointment, jobs or engagement
Does not disclose information about previous ( or current ) relationship – wives or girlfriends
Tells stories that don’t line up his actions or what you know about him
Goes period of time without contacting you
Is not forth coming with information about his employment or how he makes money
Your Defence:
Develop a questioning mind. Compare what he says with what he does, trust him but check his words, verify his claims.
The Addict
He is a man that is hooked on drugs or alcohol. His primary focus is his addiction, the woman in his life come secondary. Often times an addict looks promising and dependable but the truth is he does not bother about you if the substance he uses is available.
His nature.
Uses most of his income on addictive agent
Suffers mood swings in attitude if he can not use his agent
Has lost relationships, jobs, or other significant things due to his actions
Lies about his usage
Lies about his where about so he can use his agent
Does not want to discuss the addictive agent
Causes you discomfort with his attitude about his agent
Places people as secondary to the agent
Uses addictive substances almost daily
Your Defence:
Ensure that you are not living with relations that are addicts, this is important because you will find it difficult to detect his addictive nature simply because you are used to living with them.
Secondly keep a open mind, be on the lookout for signs that borders on addiction.
If he is, then know you are secondary
The Abusive and Violent Man
He has a big problem with equality based relationship. He can not stand to be questioned or influenced. He has issues with power and control, As far as he is concerned women are to controlled and any resistance must be conquered through force, which comes via abuse and violence
His nature.
Talks down to you, criticizes you, call you names, or uses belittling languages against you.
Refers to his previous partners in negative demeaning ways.
Attempts to control or dominate your life choices small or large
Tries to dictate your spiritual or religious beliefs
He is frequently irritable
Raises his voice, yells or scream even when carrying on a normal conversation
Punches wall or throw things when angry
Seems to experience anger as his most frequent emotion
Has been suspended or expelled from school or work for anger or fighting
Has trouble with his previous relationship because of his anger
Blames you or others for his anger or outburst
Your Defence
Leave the relationship on the first sign of violence. Since violence is progressive, the first slap should be the end of the relationship, because if your stay on in the relationship more slaps will surface
Emotional Predator.
He is a type of man that takes advantage of the emotional gap in your life. He is constantly meeting your emotional needs and ensuring that you are tied or dependant on him.
His nature.
He has a natural instinct sensing vulnerable or “sensitive” women
Senses women with low self esteem
Senses women with weak emotional and segxwal boundaries
Senses women who want or require relationships in order to feel needed or fulfilled
Senses women who are bored lonely or needy
Senses women’s body and eye language
He is overly helpful, comforting and understanding
Creates a sense of fun and mystique to draw you in.
Senses unfulfilled physical-intimacy needs as well as segxwal needs
Comes on fast and strong and sweeps you off your feet.
Is overly interested in every detail of your life
Wants to move in together or wants to marry quickly
He is a chameleon who can be a lot of things to al people.
Your defence
Don’t disclose too much about yourself to him.
Watch is reaction when you refuse to disclose personal information or when he ask certain questions – in most cases he will ask more question or try to influence you to disclose more about yourself.
For Questions & Clarifications
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