Can you move into a woman's house after marriage? (Page 2)

Date: 02-08-2009 12:08 am (12 years ago) | Author: King Samuel O Dguy
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- ceejay58 at 2-08-2009 07:35 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
.
Posted: at 2-08-2009 07:35 PM (12 years ago) | Hero
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- around_d_corner at 2-08-2009 07:40 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
ma ans is capital NOPE isn't possible....
Posted: at 2-08-2009 07:40 PM (12 years ago) | Hero
Reply
- ceejay58 at 2-08-2009 07:48 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
ok
Posted: at 2-08-2009 07:48 PM (12 years ago) | Hero
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- around_d_corner at 2-08-2009 08:12 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
Quote from: PreetyInstinct on  2-08-2009 07:10 PM
Quote from: mazi on  2-08-2009 01:19 AM
nah nah......summary plz
and short one... Smiley
and bi fast.........
Posted: at 2-08-2009 08:12 PM (12 years ago) | Hero
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- nellygold at 2-08-2009 09:28 PM (12 years ago)
(f)
Quote from: gabon on  2-08-2009 06:50 PM
ok na

r u afraid lol
Posted: at 2-08-2009 09:28 PM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
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- Dapson50 at 2-08-2009 09:38 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
Abah, how can you move into a woman house after marriage most especially in Naija, you don't become woman wrappa be that now, boy, boy, kai Alah kiyaye.
Posted: at 2-08-2009 09:38 PM (12 years ago) | Newbie
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- nellygold at 2-08-2009 09:47 PM (12 years ago)
(f)
Quote from: Dapson50 on  2-08-2009 09:38 PM
Abah, how can you move into a woman house after marriage most especially in Naija, you don't become woman wrappa be that now, boy, boy, kai Alah kiyaye.

WE R IN  MODERN DAZ  Wink
Posted: at 2-08-2009 09:47 PM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
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- brightossy at 2-08-2009 09:52 PM (12 years ago)
(m)
Quote from: esonu on  2-08-2009 05:32 PM
Quote from: brightossy on  2-08-2009 12:37 PM
Quote from: esonu on  2-08-2009 11:58 AM
is not ideal jor!!! to some gurls they will use that opportunity to disrespect u, any slightest mistake she go yarb u, tell u dat u arnt man enough
Or even give u quit notice.
DAT TIME U GO BE LIKE SHEEP WEY NO GET SHEPERD
And start 2 dey sleep unda bridge 4 mile2 lagos.
Posted: at 2-08-2009 09:52 PM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
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- nicemaureen at 3-08-2009 12:07 AM (12 years ago)
(f)
well, for me ooo is not proper i want to live in my husand house
Posted: at 3-08-2009 12:07 AM (12 years ago) | Newbie
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- fem2008 at 3-08-2009 01:06 AM (12 years ago)
(m)
a lot wrong with it
one, is not biblical
two, is not our culture in 9ija
three, in nature, is not respectful
that why a lot of single mum
in western world
Posted: at 3-08-2009 01:06 AM (12 years ago) | Newbie
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- erikaakpan at 3-08-2009 02:43 AM (12 years ago)
(f)
Quote from: nellygold on  2-08-2009 03:02 PM
Quote from: erikaakpan on  2-08-2009 12:20 AM
I personally dnt see anything wrong with it but it is advisable for them to go looking for a place together so there wouldnt be any confusion. If the couple wants to live together, then the should start afresh. its traditional for the woman to move in with the man but, things are different now. Also it depends on the couple financially, if the man isnt making enough money at the time then wat else can u do. The only bad thing about that is, that the woman will think that she is in control of everything. From my experience we both moved out from out apt and went searching together, cause that is what was reasonable at the time.

She's right

There's nothing wrong with that, if the woman in question will realise that she's been married to the man, not the other round.., n if she can maintain to keep ego/pride far away...,then there'r 'ill be no problem..

thanks nelly

Posted: at 3-08-2009 02:43 AM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
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- nellygold at 3-08-2009 06:57 AM (12 years ago)
(f)
Quote from: erikaakpan on  3-08-2009 02:43 AM
Quote from: nellygold on  2-08-2009 03:02 PM
Quote from: erikaakpan on  2-08-2009 12:20 AM
I personally dnt see anything wrong with it but it is advisable for them to go looking for a place together so there wouldnt be any confusion. If the couple wants to live together, then the should start afresh. its traditional for the woman to move in with the man but, things are different now. Also it depends on the couple financially, if the man isnt making enough money at the time then wat else can u do. The only bad thing about that is, that the woman will think that she is in control of everything. From my experience we both moved out from out apt and went searching together, cause that is what was reasonable at the time.

She's right

There's nothing wrong with that, if the woman in question will realise that she's been married to the man, not the other round.., n if she can maintain to keep ego/pride far away...,then there'r 'ill be no problem..

thanks nelly

u r welcome, how r u today?
Posted: at 3-08-2009 06:57 AM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
Reply
- erikaakpan at 3-08-2009 07:52 AM (12 years ago)
(f)
Quote from: nellygold on  3-08-2009 06:57 AM
Quote from: erikaakpan on  3-08-2009 02:43 AM
Quote from: nellygold on  2-08-2009 03:02 PM
Quote from: erikaakpan on  2-08-2009 12:20 AM
I personally dnt see anything wrong with it but it is advisable for them to go looking for a place together so there wouldnt be any confusion. If the couple wants to live together, then the should start afresh. its traditional for the woman to move in with the man but, things are different now. Also it depends on the couple financially, if the man isnt making enough money at the time then wat else can u do. The only bad thing about that is, that the woman will think that she is in control of everything. From my experience we both moved out from out apt and went searching together, cause that is what was reasonable at the time.

She's right

There's nothing wrong with that, if the woman in question will realise that she's been married to the man, not the other round.., n if she can maintain to keep ego/pride far away...,then there'r 'ill be no problem..

thanks nelly

u r welcome, how r u today?

im ggod, how r u?

u came peeping at my profile the other day n didnt say hello.......

Posted: at 3-08-2009 07:52 AM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
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- myragonza at 3-08-2009 08:03 AM (12 years ago)
(f)
Quote from: dguy on  2-08-2009 12:08 AM
Random interviews were taken on this subject by the vanguard newspaper:

Good, but count me out— Mode 9, Musician
Quote
Sincerely there’s nothing wrong in that, especially if the man in question does not have the financial muscles to live up to his responsibility. In this critical period of economic crisis, it would be advisable for the man or woman to move into the apartment of the party who already has one. If you look at this issue very well, you’ll discover that it’s another way of cutting down on cost. Instead of spending money on agents and their landlords, there’s no law in this country that says the man cannot stay in his wife’s apartment. I don’t see it as any big deal?

In the same way, the woman would naturally move into the man’s house if he’s got all the resources. It’s a two- way thing. It’s either the man has more money and carries the woman along or vice versa. But personally, I’ll not want to do something like that.

Ah! This is Africa…o. Such a thing will probably work out very well in the Western part of the world. In Africa, a man is expected to be a man in all he does. Our people will always frown at such things, so I won’t do it. It’s a personal decision.

At worse, both of us can put our money together to rent an apartment. It will be difficult for me to marry a woman and then move in to live with her.
This is not to say that those African men who indulge in such acts are weak, nor am I laughing at them. But then, I don’t buy the idea for myself.

Remember that it’s also very possible for the woman to rise up tomorrow and use it against the man, women will always be women no matter how much she claims to love you.
Even if she was to be the best woman on earth, you may upset her someday and she may not even know when she’ll remind you that you’re putting up in her house.
Another problem that man will have to face will come from his friends. If he’s my friend, I’ll not mock him about it but most of his friends will definitely abuse him for that. Some will go as far as calling him woman wrapper. And before you know it, he’ll begin to lose his ego.
At last, he too will not be happy with himself. It’s even possible for him to plan leaving the home for the woman when he feels he can’t take it anymore.

This whole calamity is worse when the man in question does not earn much. If he’s wealthy, he wouldn’t mind buying the house from his wife and even if he doesn’t, people will not see anything wrong with the idea.

For the man who decides to go and leave in his wife’s apartment, he should equally be prepared for all this wahala.
If you ask me to advise my friend, brother or sister on this issue, I’ll not stop them from doing what they think is right for them. If my brother thinks it’s right for him to go and live in his wife’s apartment, I’ll let him do it. You know what? People do not really like the truth. So, I’ll encourage them to go ahead with their plans.
And if I have a sister who thinks it’s right for her husband to come and live in her house, I’ll also encourage her to go ahead so that in future, they can’t say I denied them anything.

Don’t tell me that I’m not a good friend…oo because e no good to put mouth for husband and wife matter. I don talk my own finish

It’s okay but — Kalu Ikeagwu, Actor
Quote
There’s nothing wrong with it for  those who can do it. The most important thing is that the parties involved have a mutual agreement. After all, you and I know that husband and wife share responsibilities in most cases, especially when both of them earn good salaries. So it doesn’t matter who moves into whose home.
But I’‘ll prefer my woman to move into my own apartment not because it’s wrong. It’s just a personal opinion.


It will bring disrespect —  Pascal Izuchukwu, Lab analyst
Quote
I’ll never think about it because women have a way of using anything they do for a man against him in the long run. Here in Africa, a man is expected to be the head of the home but when he moves into the woman’s apartment, it simply means that the woman is now in charge of the affair.
Some women will even go as far as using abusive words at you when there’s any misunderstanding. God has made it that the woman is a helpmate and not the sole provider of the home.



Society will frown at it— Tope Oladimeji, Make up artist
Quote
I don’t think it’s a bad idea. But in this country of ours, society will frown at it. Some people will begin to feel that I’m forcing him to marry me. Others may think he doesn’t have the money to cater for his home and I want to influence him with my wealth.
It will be better for me to give him money to rent a new house and everybody will see that he’s the person spending the cash and not me.

It will amaze you to know that most times, those things people say about us have a way of turning around to become a reality. So, don’t give people that space of wagging their tongues on you.



What God has joined together… —  Yinka Davies, Musician
Quote
Have they not become one? Did the Bible not instruct us never to be intruders? For God’s sake, if the man and woman have been joined together in matrimony, then I don’t see the need for any gossip about whether the man is moving into the woman’s house or the woman is moving into the man’s house.

I think what really matters is that we take time to know who we are getting married to, after which if you think both of you are compatible, then ask for God’s favour, simple!
We really need to have a change of heart in this part of the world because our mind set is so polluted that we frown at everything, even those that should not bother us. As for me, there’s nothing wrong with the society but everything is wrong with the people therein. So, we need to correct our mind set.


No big deal —  Adeola Ajayi, Actress
Quote
I don’t think there’s anything wrong  with  that at all, it’s just a society thing. I can allow my man move in with me after wedding if there’s mutual understanding between us. There’s no big deal about whether the guy’s moving into my apartment or I moving into his own.
My ex- boyfriend’s mother had stayed with me in my family house and I never saw it as a difficult tax. No, big deal.


I won’t let that happen— Carol Tacha, Fashion designer
Quote
I’ll not allow such a thing to happen to me-o! And do you know why? People will think I’m the man of the house and even the man may one day use it against me some day.
If you know how most men feel when they are not capable of taking care of their families financially, then you’ll not try something like this. Men always feel inferior about every little thing, especially when their women are more financially buoyant.
One day, he might get irritated and walk out of the marriage and that may mark the end of the marriage. And when this happens, what will I do then?


What are your views on this?


i suggest we get our own house,Dguy.... Cool Cool

Posted: at 3-08-2009 08:03 AM (12 years ago) | Addicted Hero
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- nellygold at 3-08-2009 08:09 AM (12 years ago)
(f)
Quote from: erikaakpan on  3-08-2009 07:52 AM
Quote from: nellygold on  3-08-2009 06:57 AM
Quote from: erikaakpan on  3-08-2009 02:43 AM
Quote from: nellygold on  2-08-2009 03:02 PM
Quote from: erikaakpan on  2-08-2009 12:20 AM
I personally dnt see anything wrong with it but it is advisable for them to go looking for a place together so there wouldnt be any confusion. If the couple wants to live together, then the should start afresh. its traditional for the woman to move in with the man but, things are different now. Also it depends on the couple financially, if the man isnt making enough money at the time then wat else can u do. The only bad thing about that is, that the woman will think that she is in control of everything. From my experience we both moved out from out apt and went searching together, cause that is what was reasonable at the time.

She's right

There's nothing wrong with that, if the woman in question will realise that she's been married to the man, not the other round.., n if she can maintain to keep ego/pride far away...,then there'r 'ill be no problem..

thanks nelly

u r welcome, how r u today?

im ggod, how r u?

u came peeping at my profile the other day n didnt say hello.......


lol ok am sry 4 dat, i ill say hi nxt time ok, i ill be rushing out for work now, talk to u later, n takia
Posted: at 3-08-2009 08:09 AM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
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- SAmyrocko at 3-08-2009 10:30 AM (12 years ago)
(m)
Can someone help me and summarize this plsss ?

Posted: at 3-08-2009 10:30 AM (12 years ago) | Addicted Hero
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- erikaakpan at 3-08-2009 10:32 AM (12 years ago)
(f)
do u think its right for a man to move in with his wife? the interviews above are giving u wat other ppl though about it

Posted: at 3-08-2009 10:32 AM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
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- SAmyrocko at 3-08-2009 10:35 AM (12 years ago)
(m)
Move ln, as ln to live together ln the same house ?

Posted: at 3-08-2009 10:35 AM (12 years ago) | Addicted Hero
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- erikaakpan at 3-08-2009 10:37 AM (12 years ago)
(f)
yes, u kno na. once u get married should the man move in with the woman.....but traditionally the woman is suppose to move in with the man

Posted: at 3-08-2009 10:37 AM (12 years ago) | Gistmaniac
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- SAmyrocko at 3-08-2009 10:43 AM (12 years ago)
(m)
Well, lf that ls the case. Personnaly l don't think ls something to worry about.
provided the wife will still see you as the man of the house and accord you the respect that
ls due to you as the head of the family.
I wouldn't want a lady that will turn Red after showing me a different colour from the on set.
If l presumed that she would change, l'd rather abort the idea before lt becomes too late.


Posted: at 3-08-2009 10:43 AM (12 years ago) | Addicted Hero
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