Just read this wonderful article sent in by Tomi Sule..It's a must read
We have heard the saying“It is better to be alone than in bad company”;it is great to be married, but I believe it is better to be single than to be in a marriage where you feel trapped and dead on the inside. A broken relationship is better than a broken home, so if there are signs of an unhappy marriage already showing in your relationship, please have the courage to walk away. It is better to let go of the’ good’, so the ‘best’ can come. if you aren’t in a relationship, the good thing is that you can make the most of being single by building and preparing yourself to be a great partner and spouse when you do get hitched…How do you maximise singlehood? What should you do while ‘waiting’ – or looking for Mr or Mrs Right?
1. Open your eyes:
Don’t shut yourself off from the world, be accessible. You may not have a very active social life when you’re married because of increased responsibilities, so this is your chance to build friendships that will stand the test of time. Besides, how will you meet a potential spouse if you don’t give yourself the chance? Rebecca in the bible got a husband because she went to the ‘well’. The well was a social meeting
point for shepherds and maidens because it was the major source of water in the area and almost everyone had to come there. It was a good place to exchange greetings and chat while you waited your turn to fetch water and since it was done every day, it was a good spot for the beginning of many‘promising’ friendships.
Join a gym, a department in church, a club or start a new hobby where you get to meet people. The idea is to make friends and get to know them –without an agenda.
When you know people in a relaxed atmosphere, they also get to know you and potential ‘courtship’
relationships can begin…I must say this, where you go determines the kind of people you’d meet. Anyone one you meet in a brothel, a night club or a friend’s bachelor party may not have the same values as you and may be the cause of ‘regret-worthy’ one night stands and unwanted pregnancies waiting to happen to an unfortunate victim; so choose your social activities wisely!
2. Look inside:
To be good company, you must learn how to successfully stand alone. You can’t support your future spouse and be a backbone when you haven’t learnt how to support yourself emotionally and otherwise. A successful marriage is the coming together of two ‘whole’ people not two ‘halves’.
That’s why the seemingly romantic line “You complete me” is like a fallacy, because no human being can ‘complete’another person because they are not God. Yes you may feel better around someone and you
may fit together like two peas in a pod, ‘5’and ‘6’…. and all the ‘perfect pair’synonyms, but you need to discover yourself, your likes,your purpose, your passion and what you want out of life. Focus on YOU, focus on building your career, on building your character and building your dreams; that way when he or she comes along, they will be proud and feel so lucky to be with someone like you.
3. Be patient:
I know this seems cliché or maybe crazy if you’re way past your 30s and under pressure to settle down, but the most mistakes in life are made when you’re in a hurry. Count the cost of getting married and be sure that you are ready. Don’t get married for your mother, or for society,do it for yourself. You will be the only one in the marriage with someone else, so why shouldn’t you be allowed to make sure you’re ready?
READ MORE ARTICLE HERE
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